From the first time I watched Star Wars, I was hooked. It was 1996, I was eight, it was after a trip to Disney World and riding Star Tours, asking my dad "this is cool, but what is all this?" When we got home, we went to the video rental store (yea, one of those), and rented "A New Hope." As soon as it was over I begged my parents to go rent "Empire" and then "Return of the Jedi."
When the first trailer for "Phantom Menace" came out I was in awe. More Star Wars?! We bought tickets for opening night (and got stuck in the first few rows). I can still remember the absolute silence when the movie started and the words "A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away," appeared on screen, followed immediately by the cheers when the first notes of John Williams' iconic score began to play.
In anticipation of December's release of "The Last Jedi," I rewatched all eight movies and have come up with a list of the most iconic moments, best, worst, and funniest moments in the series. I will also run through a few continuity errors (and things done right across 40+years), Easter Eggs, and a few miscellaneous things I noticed along the way. For reference, I have seen the eight full length movies starting with the digitally remastered original series, extended editions, and Blu Ray remakes. For this post, I will be using the Blu Ray editions, because... like it or not... they are currently the "definitive" edition (unless Disney releases the unaltered versions of the movies). In terms of the continuity issues, I will also be referencing "The Clone Wars" movie and TV series, but not "Rebels" because I haven't watched "Rebels" yet.
Forty years, eight movies, and one super nerd means that this will be a rather lengthy post, so I don't expect many of you to make it all the way through this post. But, the way I see it, if you can make it through multiple viewings for the prequel trilogy, you can probably make it through this. So, without further ado: "Chewie, punch it."
(WRITER'S NOTE: While in compiling these lists, I watched the movies in chronological order according to the story, however, I believe first timers should watch movies in order of release date for maximum impact, and lists were complied with that in mind)
(ALSO: SPOILERS!)
The Force is strong with this one - The most iconic moments in the Star Wars saga
In eight movies, I tallied 94 iconic moments. Rather than narrow them down, here all 94 (I told you this would take a while). Some iconic moments will resurface in the best and worst lists, yes, some iconic moments are on the worst list. Obviously, the original trilogy and specifically "A New Hope," will have more iconic moments than the newer movie, since it's tough to call a scene from a 2016 movie iconic just a year later. But that's the power and impact of Star Wars, that there still are some.
First, there are four things that deserve iconic mention by themselves:
1. The music - Whether it's the main theme, the Imperial theme, Duel of Fates, or any of the other countless melodies in Star Wars, it's hard to find someone that won't recognize the tune if you start humming, whistling, or playing it. This just proves that John Williams is the Man
2. Opening Logos/Crawl - I was not alive in 1977 to see the original Star Wars in theaters, but anyone who was told me that jaws dropped at the start of the movie. Words in space? What?! Since then, it's tough to imagine a Star Wars movie that doesn't have an opening crawl (looking at you Rogue One). But, in my mind, the 20th Century Fox logo and fanfare, right into the "A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away...," "Star Wars" bursting into the screen, and the opening crawl all go hand-in-hand and make me smile every time I see them.
3. May the Force be with you - Perhaps the most iconic line said over the whole course of the saga.
Jedi? Not Jedi? Doesn't matter. Almost everyone gets in on this action at some point. Also, this line has inspired it's own holiday! Also, also, as a Catholic, it's hard to not want to respond "and also with you," (or now, "and with your spirit).
4. "I have a bad feeling about this" - One of the more notable running gags in the Star Wars saga is the use of this phrase. My guess, George Lucas used it multiple times in "A New Hope" by accident and when people noticed he just played it off like it was a planned joke, and to hammer it home just kept using it in every other movie. Now, it's become a must for any future Star Wars movie.
Ok, now here's the real list of most iconic moments.
94. TIE Fighters in the Sun (Force Awakens) - it was in the trailer, and it's a beautiful shot
93. Jabba's Laugh (Return of the Jedi) - anytime you get a state of drunkenness based off of you and Neil Patrick Harris impersonates you, yo know you've done a good job.
92. Leia warns Luke in Cloud City (Empire Strikes Back) - perhaps an example of the sometimes lazy writing in the Star Wars saga that this line would be replicated and improved upon in the next. movie. But still, you see this scene a lot in video games, board games, and other merchandise or advertisements.
91. "Rebellions are built on hope" (Rogue One) - another one on the list mainly because it's in the trailer. But, a valid argument for Jyn Erso to make in trying to convince everyone to attack the Death Star.
90. Hux addresses the First Order (Force Awakens) - It's tough to see Bill Weasley as a bad guy, but it was impressive to see his ferocity in addressing the troops. Also, jaw dropping at how many troops there were in the First Order, reminiscent of Saruman rallying his Uruk-hai.
89. Darth Vader's Entrance (Rogue One) - We'll come back to this later, but in the meantime, seriously... how ominous is this?
88. Death Star looming on the horizon (Rogue One) - Another beautiful shot (unless you're on that planet) that even made it onto a poster.
87. Rey speeds past a downed Star Destroyer and X-Wing (Force Awakens) - In first few scenes of the latest Star Wars episode, we're still establishing the scene when Rey speeds past the wreckage of, presumably, the Battle of Jakku. I don't know much about the Battle of Jakku (as it's not featured in the movies), but I thank those that gave their lives for crashing their ships and giving us this shot.
86. Owen and Beru die (A New Hope) - Nothing against them, but I didn't care too much for Owen and Beru Lars. Sure, they raised Luke and had nice cameos in the prequels, but they didn't do much except die, allowing Luke to leave Tatooine and join the rebellion. But, the image of their death is still iconic to Star Wars, and the inspiration for one of the funnier moments in Family Guy's Blue Harvest.
85. "It's true. All of it." (Force Awakens) - Yes, I know this isn't the entirety of the line, but I have to save some fun for later. Han explaining to Rey and Finn that the stories they heard about the old days of the rebellion are all true. (Again, more later).
84. Anakin and Padme's Wedding (Attack of the Clones) - Not even so much the wedding itself as the closing shot of the movie that is iconic. Also worth noting the mirroring of the final scene of "Empire Strikes Back," complete with R2-D2 and C-3PO standing off to the side (which ranks a little higher).
83. Kylo Ren takes on Rey and Finn (Force Awakens) - Star Wars is known for it's climactic fights, but this one ranks so low mostly because of how new it is, and how much development is still ahead of the characters in the next two episodes.
82. The Resistance Arrives (Force Awakens) - This moment is iconic, again, because of the shot of Han, Chewie, and Finn surrendering just as the Resistance arrives to rescue them being included in the trailer.
81. Ending Shot (Empire Strikes Back) - While the movie doesn't end on this shot (no really, the movie ends looking at the outside of the medical frigate as it sails away), it's still the definitive image you have of the end of Empire Strikes Back. (Also, see what I mean about the mirroring of Anakin and Padme's marriage?)
80. Emperor's arrival (Return of the Jedi) - The first time we see Emperor Palpatine in person, and how the troops pull out all the stops for his arrival. I mean, is anyone actively working in the Death Star when he steps off his shuttle?
79. The Trash Compactor Scene (A New Hope) - Is there anything more terrifying than being slowly crushed to death along with a pile of garbage? Okay, probably, but still a very iconic moment in the original movie.
78. Death Star Ray Gun Assembly (Rogue One) - This scene was very Easter Egg-ish, but still pretty awesome. There are few things more iconic than the Death Star and it's planet destroying power, and seeing the source of that being installed stood out in the latest installment in the saga.
77. Kylo Ren's tantrum (Force Awakens) - Upon receiving the news that FN-2187 (Finn) helped Rey escape from Jakku, Kylo Ren explodes and destroys all the machinery around him. Talking to people after this movie came out, this was always one of the first scenes people talked about. But, I'll save the link and talk about this scene more a bit later.
76. Starkiller base fires (Force Awakens) - It's a Super Death Star that destroyed a whole planetary system. How can it not be an iconic scene?
75. Palpatine makes Luke watch space battle (Return of the Jedi) - Emperor Palpatine, the Dark Lord of the Sith, makes Luke Skywalker, a budding Jedi, watch as his "Rebel friends" wage war outside the second Death Star. The dialogue is what makes this scene iconic, Palpatine throwing everything he can at Luke to get him to convert to the Dark Side.
74. Luke tells Leia they're related (Return of the Jedi) - By the third movie we know that Luke is strong with the Force. We know Luke is Darth Vader's son. But for him to have a sister that is also a main character?! WHOA!
73. Han Solo's death (Force Awakens) - Thirty-Three years and four movies too late if you ask Harrison Ford, but anytime you kill off a main character it's bound to become an iconic scene.
72. Escape from space slug (Empire Strikes Back) - Only Han Solo would be
71. Kylo Ren talks to Vader (Force Awakens) - Sure, the burnt Vader mask is also Easter Egg-ish, but seeing this in the trailer instantly brought out the geek in everyone and made the wait for this movie that much harder.
70. Invasion of Theed (Phantom Menace) - Despite its many flaws, Episode I was a GREAT movie according to everyone after leaving the theater for the first time in 1999. While more or less a throwaway transition shot, this image specifically is one that has likely been burned in your mind's eye when thinking of this movie, and I guarantee you can also hear the song played during this scene when looking at that picture.
69. The Opera (Revenge of the Sith) - A lot of the dialogue in this scene was included in the trailer and has become highly quotable among fans. This scene is also iconic because it signifies, essentially, the start of Anakin's turn to the Dark Side.
68. Battle Droids activate (Phantom Menace) - Sure, the CGI hasn't aged well in the 18 years (oh my God! 18 YEARS?!) since Episode I came out, but even so, the scene where the battle droids are all crouched on the ground, stand up, turn, and grab their guns was a sure sign that we were in for something pretty epic.
67. "So this is how liberty dies... with thunderous applause" (Revenge of the Sith) - We all know the prequels suffered from poor writing, and I'll say best efforts by great actors to do the best with what they were given. So, maybe this scene is one of those. But still, it's a pretty significant moment in galactic history, THE moment the Empire is formed, and the warm reception with which it was welcomed. Not to mention the jokes/memes/implications it has on current events. The thing I don't like about this scene is that the Senate chamber appears to be cylindrical with the floating pods arranged in columns as opposed to in the previous movies looking conical with pods in spirals. I know this is a matter of perspective, but still, it bothers me. Also, Bail Organa and Padme are senators from different planets, and yet are sitting in the same floating pod. I don't know proper protocol for these things, but if every planet has their own pod, I wouldn't think this would be allowed. Also, who's in whose pod?
66. Luke sees Force ghosts (Return of the Jedi) - After defeating Darth Vader and successfully turning him back into his father Anakin Skywalker, and the death of the Emperor, Luke escaped the Death Star with his father's body, to head to the Forest Moon of Endor to join the celebration. In a moment of solitude, Luke sees the manifested spirits of Obi-Wan and Yoda, shortly joined by that of his father. For reasons we'll get into later, this great moment is buried low on this list.
65. Luke enters the Dark Side Cave (Empire Strikes Back) - Luke is training to be a Jedi and comes across a cave on Dagobah where the Force has a strong presence. Yoda urges him to leave his weapons behind, but
64. Luke lifts rocks (Empire Strikes Back) - I'm including the rock lifting separately from the dialogue and rescuing the X-Wing, pretty much specifically because Weird Al mentions this exact moment in his song "Yoda."
63. Gungans emerge through the fog (Phantom Menace) - Again, another somewhat throwaway transition scene. But, remember, it had been 16 years since the last Star Wars movie, a new saga is announced, everyone is waiting for the trailer, and this is the first scene in that trailer. For that reason alone, it's iconic. Also, if you miss the 20th Century Fox and Lucasfilm logos, for a split second, you might confuse it for the scene where the Grasshoppers arrive in "A Bug's Life," which when the trailer first came out for Episode I, was also due in theaters.
62. Order 66 (Revenge of the Sith) - Emperor Palpatine brings an end to the Jedi Order by executing Order 66, an order to the clone troopers to assassinate their Jedi commanders. It's one of the more devastating scenes in the movie. Because of that several moments can be considered iconic. Palpatine's line (not in the linked scene) to Anakin: "Every single Jedi, including your friend Obi-Wan Kenobi, is not an enemy of the Republic," included in the trailer. The image of
61. Yoda tells Luke "You will be [afraid]." (Empire Strikes Back) - Despite a full movie and a half of Luke learning the ways of the force, we don't really know much about it. Then Yoda drops this line on us and we're all like whoa, this is gonna get real! Also, has to be iconic when anytime someone says "I'm not ____" and you answer "You will be. You will be."
60. Vader force chokes Death Star officer (A New Hope) - This is the first time that we see this particular force ability. Really anything involving Darth Vader in this movie can be classified as iconic.
59. "Begun the Clone War Has" (Attack of the Clones) - The line itself is not so much iconic as, again, the memorable closing shot of the scene. So many clones. So much CGI.
58. "Hope" (Rogue One) - A de-aged CGI Carrie Fisher, as Princess Leia, utters just one word at the end of Rogue One but still left moviegoers smiling, cheering, or jaw dropped when it was uttered. Little did we know that this would be the last appearance of Carrie Fisher in a Star Wars movie while she was alive, adding to it's iconicness (yes, I know it's not a word).
57. "That's no moon" (A New Hope) - Han Solo, Luke Skywalker, Ben Kenobi, and Chewbacca are aboard the Millennium Falcon entering the remnants of the Alderaan system approaching what appears to be a small moon. Obi-Wan utters the iconic phrase "that's no moon, it's a space station," to which Han replies "it's too big to be a space station." Yea, Han, that's the point. It's a Death Star, not a Death Pluto. Sorry Pluto.
56. Obi-Wan explains the Force to Luke (A New Hope) - The Force is the basis for the entire Star Wars saga. Imagine these movies without the force. Pretty boring. Until the scene in Obi-Wan's house we know nothing about the Force. Afterward, we know
55. Vader talks to Palpatine (Empire Strikes Back) - Darth Vader is summoned by the Emperor, via hologram phone call (can we call it a phone call?). It's our first encounter with the ruler of the galaxy, making it an iconic moment. What's more is that it's really the first moment we realize that the Emperor is strong with the Force, until then we don't really know too much about him. It's also the beginning of the whole "Darth Vader is Luke's dad" reveal. Also, an issue I'll revisit later, Ian McDiarmid was added into the scene replacing the original actor, Marjorie Eaton, and voice actor, Clive Rivell.
54. Galactic Celebration (Return of the Jedi) - The Emperor is dead, his second in command is dead, the second Death Star is destroyed, the Empire has fallen. There's joy across the galaxy. More on this later.
53. Obi-Wan inspects Clone Army (Attack of the Clones) - The movie is called Attack of the Clones. The war is called the Clone Wars. Halfway through the movie we finally get a look at the clones and man, it was worth it. That's an impressive shot with Obi-Wan on the balcony and clones as far as the eye can see (or the screen can hold).
52. Obi-Wan reveals himself (A New Hope) - Luke follows R2-D2 on a search for "Obi-Wan Kenobi." Luke thinks he might be related to "Old Ben Kenobi," (gee I wonder what gave him that idea). When Ben comes to Luke's rescue after being attacked by sand people, Luke asks if Obi-Wan is a relative of his, to which Ben reveals "he's me."
51. Kylo Ren lights his lightsaber (Force Awakens) - The lightsaber is, not even arguably, I'll say definitively, the coolest weapon in the history of everything. For 38 years lightsabers came in all sorts of colors (though red, blue, green, and purple were the only ones shown on the big screen). But they had all looked relatively the same, simply put, handle and single beam of light. Then came a long Kylo Ren. Not satisfied with your average every day lightsaber, he has three blades, reminiscent of medieval knights swords with a crossed hilt. (I know the linked picture is from the end of the movie, but also from the trailer). Everyone's face when they saw that thing light up in the trailer....
50. Han running towards and away from Stormtroopers (A New Hope) - Much like Leia telling Luke about the trap on Bespin, this scene is used even more in Star Wars montages for, you name it. I'll talk about this later as well, but when you think of Han Solo this is probably one of the top five moments you'll come up with.
49. Darth Vader's funeral (Return of the Jedi) - Much like Han Solo's death which we've talked about already, any time you kill off a main character, there has to be some level of iconicness (still a made up word) involved. In this case, it's putting Vader on a funeral pyre. Luke, standing alone, burning his father. It's a powerful scene. Where's everybody else? If I had to guess they're
48. Han and Leia hug (Force Awakens) - Han Solo and Princess Leia, name a more iconic duo. I'll wait.......... When two of your most famous characters reconnect and embrace after 30 years, it's going to get the fanboy blood flowing through everyone.
47. Vader's first breath (Revenge of the Sith) - First of all, Darth Vader's breathing is one of the more unmistakable sounds in pop culture, and chronologically, this moment was the first time you ever hear it.
46. Anakin's angry glare (Revenge of the Sith) - This ranks higher than Vader's first breath because it's inclusion in the trailer and on posters and the like. It's another one of those shots where it's omission from the movie wouldn't really have changed anything, but they kind of figured, hey, let's make him look angry and hammer home the point that he's a bad guy now. I'm not sure where his yellow eyes came from, or went after this seen. But, if looks could kill, amiright?
45. Darth Vader puts on his helmet (Empire Strikes Back) - Darth Vader, one of the most menacing villains ever brought to life on the big screen. Why does he wear the black suit? This is our first indication of why, he's injured and scarred, and the suit is more than just for show.
44. Mace Windu "This party's over" (Attack of the Clones) - Mace Windu arrives on Geonosis to rescue Anakin, Obi-Wan, and Padme. He ignites his purple lightsaber for the first time, the first lightsaber lit that isn't red, blue, or green.
43. Darth Vader's rebel slaughter (Rogue One) - When you think of Rogue One, you think of Jyn, Cassian, and crew stealing the Death Star plans to set up the events of the original Star Wars movie. It came as a surprise, however welcome, to see Darth Vader ignite his lightsaber and, quite frankly, go to town on a group of rebels trapped between ships.
42. TR-8R (Force Awakens) - No, that's not his real call sign, it's apparently FN-2199. But the internet has decided it should be. The First Order stormtrooper that confronts Finn after his defection from the First Order. He's become a pop culture hero after this scene.
41. Luke force grabs his lightsaber (Empire Strikes Back) - This scene is iconic because it's another first for Force powers, using the Force to call things to you.
40. Sand people attack Luke (A New Hope) - Specifically the shot of the Tusken Raider standing over Luke pumping his arms up and down yelling in celebration(?). Not sure how they exactly captured Luke as it's pretty obvious that none of the blows with his gaffi stick actually landed. Also an interesting note, the actor that played the sand person only raised his hands once in triumph, but it didn't look great on film, so they just played/reversed/played/reversed... the clip to achieve the now famous scene.
39. Speeder Bike chase (Return of the Jedi) - When you think of the Forest Moon of Endor and get past the Ewoks, you'll probably immediately think of the Speeder Bike chase.
38. Assault on Hoth (Empire Strikes Back) - The first Star Wars movie featured a lot of sneaking around, with Han, Luke, and Leia shooting at Stormtroopers in the Death Star and then a space battle. To differentiate from that, "Empire" decided to go with a full scale ground battle complete with giant walking tanks. The AT-ATs have become synonymous with "Empire" and Hoth, not to mention the frequency with which you had to play this battle in "Shadows of the Empire."
37. Destruction of Alderaan (A New Hope) - The plot of the original film in the saga revolves around destroying the Death Star, which has the power to destroy a planet. The only time that power is demonstrated is on the home world of a main character.
36. Darth Vader chokes/interrogates rebel (A New Hope) - By this time in the movie, we're still establishing the world and the characters. We don't even know this "man in black's" name, but he looks scary and WAIT WHAT?! He just lifted this guy up by the throat with one hand and is asking him questions?! This guy means business!
35. Darth Vader's Arrival (A New Hope) - After a (soon to be mentioned) groundbreaking opening sequence and shootout, this hulking cloaked figure clad head-to-toe in black emerges from a smoking doorway making no sound other than this bone chilling breathing sound. An iconic entrance for an iconic villain.
34. Vader deflects Han's blaster shot (Empire Strikes Back) - By now we know that Darth Vader can do things most normal people can't. But, so can Luke Skywalker and Obi-Wan Kenobi. But when the doors in Cloud City open and Darth Vader appears behind them and Han pulls out his blaster to shoot Vader but he holds up his hand and deflects it, I think everyone's reaction was "he did what?!"
33. Star Destroyer attack (A New Hope) - Again, I wasn't alive in 1977, but I can only imagine what it must have been like to see the opening crawl (crazy innovative) followed by a rather big spaceship coming in from the top of the screen, only to be followed by an even bigger ship that seemingly never ends.
32. Han shot first (A New Hope) - The bounty hunter Greedo finds Han Solo in the Mos Eisley cantina only to be gunned down by his target. Funny thing is, Greedo gets a shot off as well, but misses, because... Han shot first. Except for that weird time from 1997 to 2011 that Greedo shot first and awkwardly missed from point blank range.
31. Luke and Leia Death Star canyon swing (A New Hope) - Luke and Leia, separated from Han and Chewie, find themselves on the precipice of a giant canyon in the middle of the Death Star. Another scene that's often included in Star Wars montages for commercials, games, etc.
30. Obi-Wan vs. Vader (A New Hope) - Darth Vader comes face-to-face with his former master Obi-Wan Kenobi in a hallway in the Death Star. The pair exchange verbal jabs, which are a big part of why this scene has become iconic. Also helping the fact, it's the first lightsaber duel in the franchise. Which leads us to...
29. Obi-Wan's death (A New Hope) - Obi-Wan's duel with Darth Vader ends when Obi-Wan sees Luke running towards the Millennium Falcon, stops and smirks knowingly at Vader before lowering his defenses and letting his former apprentice strike him down, when his body completely disappeared from his robe leaving just his robe and lightsaber in a heap on the ground.
28. Smug Han (Return of the Jedi) - The rebel crew on the forest moon of Endor sets a trap and creates a diversion for the Imperial officers inside the shield generator to draw the crew outside into the trip. Then, Han, who is standing in their way as they try to head back into the shield generator and stands there with a "oh, I'm so sorry"look on his face and a shrug to say as much.
27. Death Star Escape (Return of the Jedi) - Han and Leia's Rebel battalion have taken down the shield generator leaving the Death Star vulnerable to attack. Lando pilots the Millennium Falcon into the heart of the Death Star to take out the main reactor. The fire caused by the triggered explosion nearly engulfs him and everyone's favorite starship, but lo and behold, the Falcon bursts out of the flames and Lando whoops triumphantly (while Nien Nunb giggles humorously next to him), and the Death Star explodes.... again.
26. Luke receives his father's lightsaber (A New Hope) - Again, the lightsaber is one of the most iconic weapons in the history of cinema. Every kid has grown up waving sticks around making lightsaber sounds. It all started with this scene, Luke receiving the lightsaber once owned by his father.
25. Millennium Falcon jumps to lightspeed (A New Hope) - Part of human nature is to try and outdo those that came before you. So far, we've broken the sound barrier. We have not broken the speed of light, which is considered impossible, but maybe in a few generations the impossible will be possible, but I won't hold my breath. So, when Han, Luke, Obi-Wan and crew talk about traveling between planetary systems, the thought was "how long is that going to take?!" Well, no time at all when you can make the jump to lightspeed. Again, in 1977, this must have been mind-blowing to see in the theaters.
24. Rey meets Luke (Force Awakens) - Despite the focus of the storyline of the latest Star Wars episode being the destruction of the newest attempt at a Death Star, the real plot is trying to find a map to find Luke Skywalker. In the end, the Resistance finds said map, and Rey, who's past is a mystery, finds the missing Jedi and presents him with his old lightsaber before the movie cuts to the end credits. OH THE SUSPENSE!
23. Vader unmasked (Return of the Jedi) - As mentioned earlier, we got a peek at the back of Darth Vader's head in "Empire Strikes Back," but after Luke turns his father back to the Light Side in "Return of the Jedi," a dying now-Anakin(?) asks his son to take his mask off so that he can see him with his own eyes. The general reaction among fans in their first viewing was probably something like this.
22. "Chewie, we're home" (Force Awakens) - Han Solo and Chewbacca, name a more iconic duo. I'll wait..........The Millennium Falcon is also arguably the most iconic ship in the Star Wars galaxy (maybe it should get its own Star Wars Story movie?). So, when your best tag-team of heroes reunites with their former ship after several decades apart, it's bound to give you goosebumps.
21. Luke staring at the sunset(s) (A New Hope) - Again, perhaps a bit of a throwaway scene (considering how much flak Luke gets for being a whiny brat in the early parts of the movie), but you can't deny that it's a beautiful looking shot of the main hero looking at not one, but TWO sunsets (how exactly does a planet revolve around two suns?)! And, let's not forget the great score by John Williams.
20. R2 shoots Luke's new lightsaber (Return of the Jedi) - Luke Skywalker descends upon Jabba the Hutt's palace to rescue Han Solo after his being frozen in carbonite. Luke, in turn, gets taken prisoner. Now, Luke lost his hand and his/his father's lightsaber in a battle with... his father at the end of "Empire Strikes Back." What's a Jedi to do without his weapon after being taken prisoner by a crime boss? Build a new one and hide it in his astromech droid until the opportune moment. Also, this is the first time that a lightsaber not blue or red was seen in the saga (because the blue didn't stand out enough against the scenery of Tatooine).
19. Yoda activates his lightsaber (Attack of the Clones) - This scene is one of the most iconic in the prequel trilogy. Yoda, the Jedi grandmaster that thrilled fans training Luke in the original trilogy is brought back in the last years of the Republic as the de facto head of the Jedi Council. In Episode I though, he's limited to more or less a glorified cameo. In Episode II though, he gets to stretch his legs (literally and figuratively) and takes part in commanding the battle of Geonosis. When Count Dooku quickly defeats Obi-Wan and Anakin, Yoda comes to the rescue to face Dooku and, after showing off their knowledge of the Force, resort to lightsabers. But wait, Yoda doesn't fight with a lightsaber. Wait he does?! Oh. My. God.
18. Luke's Death Star Trench run (A New Hope) - The rebellion is pushed to the brink. Their only chance is to destroy the Death Star. Conveniently, they have a force sensitive not-yet-Jedi piloting an X-Wing and headed right for the thermal exhaust port. But wait, he's being pursued by
17. Yoda recovers Luke's X-Wing from the swamp (Empire Strikes Back) - The scene that gave us much more knowledge of the Force than we had before, as well as the multi-purpose quotes "judge me by my size, do you?" and "that is why you fail."
16. Anakin vs. Obi-Wan (Revenge of the Sith) - You knew that by the last movie of the prequels Anakin would become Darth Vader. One could only assume that that transition would require a heart wrenching and epic battle between Anakin and his master Obi-Wan. This fight did not disappoint, and gave us a great quote to use to create endless jokes.
15. Luke vs. Vader (Empire Strikes Back) - The saga's biggest hero against the saga's biggest villain. The fight's not even close. There's a reason why the movie is called "The Empire Strikes Back." Still, a marked improvement in intensity in a lightsaber duel from the Obi-Wan Kenobi vs Darth Vader fight in the previous movie.
14. Luke vs. Vader: The Rematch (Return of the Jedi) - It's the climax fight at the end of the (at the time) final Star Wars movie. Father vs. Son with the Emperor watching. Luke is at a crossroads, resisting the pull to the Dark Side. How can it not be considered iconic?
13. Palpatine's force lightning (Return of the Jedi) - Another huge "OH SNAP!" moment for the saga. Luke has defeated Darth Vader. The Light Side has won out. But now the elderly Emperor Palpatine is entering the fray, not with a lightsaber, but with.... lightning?!.... from his hands?! Yet another first time being introduced to another power of the Force.
12. Vader kills Palpatine (Return of the Jedi) - Regardless of which version you're watching (which we'll revisit later), Darth Vader picking up his master and hurling him down the Death Star chasm to save his son is one of the indelible scenes in the series.
11. Rebel Ceremony (A New Hope) - The Death Star has been destroyed, the Empire dealt a crippling blow, the Rebels have won the day thanks to the heroics of the characters we've been following for the last two hours. Why wouldn't there be a scene honoring their achievements by giving them medals?! A great scene that is, without a doubt, aided once again by the brilliance of John Williams.
10. TIE Fighter Dog Fight (A New Hope) - Upon escaping the Death Star and witnessing the death of Ben Kenobi, our heroes are "not out of this yet," as several tie fighters. Han and Luke have to each go to one of the two gunner positions in the Millennium Falcon. After a few close calls, Luke finally hits his target, prompting Han to squash Luke's new found confidence.
9. Darth Maul's appearance on Naboo (Phantom Menace) - Due to the technology of the day, there was a limit to what the original trilogy could accomplish. That was not the case for the prequels, which,
8. "It's a trap!" (Return of the Jedi) - Who knew that a squid looking thing with a rubber face, eyes that didn't blink all the way, and fins that essentially were useless as hands would be responsible for one of the most iconic lines in the franchise. Don't get me wrong, as you'll see later, I love Admiral Ackbar, but in a series, to that point, predominantly human, he kind of came out of nowhere. When the Rebels realize that the Empire knew they were coming, Ackbar yells "IT'S A TRAP!" and a cult hero was born.
7. "These aren't the droids you're looking for" (A New Hope) - Again, one of the lines in the movie that has become an often used reference in many every day conversations. Also iconic because it is the first time we see that Jedi can use mind tricks to confuse opponents.
6. Mos Eisley Cantina scene (A New Hope) - The Star Wars movies are known for their transition shots. Almost every scene is set up with an exterior shot of the building in which the scene takes place, or a ship traveling between the place we were and the place we're going. By no means is this uncommon in other films, but seemingly more prevalent in this saga. The Cantina Scene is the most famous among them. Nothing like this had been seen in the movies before 1977, and people have been duplicating it ever since. Also, you can't think of this scene without hearing that song.
5. Han saves the day (A New Hope) - Han Solo is a hero, but he's a scoundrel, and leaves the rebellion upon returning Princess Leia and receiving his reward. Can you blame him? It's not his fight, and he has a bounty on his head. Yet, somewhere on his way back to repay Jabba the Hutt, he grows a conscience and comes back just in time to save Luke from being blown away by Darth Vader. Also, that yell.....
4. Death Star explodes (A New Hope) - Moments after Han's aforementioned return, Luke fires a photon torpedo into the thermal exhaust port just at the moment that the Death Star is getting ready to fire on Yavin 4 and the rebel base. The Death Star explodes before the laser fires up, and it's a sight to behold.
3. "I love you." "I know." (Empire Strikes Back) - Funny thing about this scene, the original script had Leia saying "I love you," and Han replying "I love you, too." No matter how many takes they did, George Lucas, Irvin Kirschner, and Harrison Ford were not satisfied. Finally, they just looked at Ford and told him to do what felt natural, and he ad libbed the line "I know" after Leia told him she loved him. Damn he's good.
2. Leia's Hologram (A New Hope) - Certain lines just stand out from the rest in movies or TV shows, some are catchphrases, other's more slogans. But, if you ask anyone, whether they've seen Star Wars or not, about Star Wars they'll probably respond with "help me Obi-Wan Kenobi, you're my only hope." Unless of course they say....
So there you have it, a rundown of the most iconic moments in the Star Wars saga, ranked as best I could, and I'm sure I missed some, but I wanted to keep it short.... ish. With (at least) two more episodes due out by 2019 and several more Star Wars stories in years to come, the list will likely grow and some moments may rise or fall based on new information to the story, or a new moment passing it. But just because a moment is iconic, doesn't mean it's one of the best (but also doesn't mean it isn't), and just because the moment is, in my opinion, one of the best doesn't mean it's iconic. So, now we get to the fun part (for me - run now while you still can), here's my take on the best and worst moments in the saga.
The Light Side - The Best Moments in the Star Wars Saga
In this section several moments previously labeled as "iconic" will not appear, but that doesn't mean I don't like them. Most of them won't appear in the "worst moments" either. While I like several of them, because it's Star Wars, what's not to like, at best, I guess I feel indifferent. But here's my favorite moments in Star Wars (arranged, painstakingly and next to impossibly, from least best to most best).
107. (sorry) Rey goes dune sledding (Force Awakens) - After a long day of scavenging imperial wreckage, Rey slides down a giant sand dune to get to her speeder. It's not really an important part of that scene, but boy does it look like fun!
106. Leia is Boushh (Return of the Jedi) - After a stressful negotiation with Jabba the Hutt for the bounty on Chewbacca, the bounty hunter Boushh (who I just found out was a real bounty hunter) appears at night to rescue Han Solo from the carbonite. Han is suffering from carbonite sickness and is disoriented and when he feels Boushh's face he asks who it is and Leia takes off the mask and says "someone who loves you." Watching this as an eight year old for the first time, I was surprised when Boushh started speaking English, but downright shocked when it turned out to be Leia. Did not see that one coming, despite knowing that Jabba's guard was Lando. I just kind of figured this Boushh character was someone new that I'd have to get to know over the course of one movie.
105. Jyn gives K-2SO a blaster (Rogue One) - Apologies for the Spanish link, but I blame YouTube. This, though, is a great scene. Jyn and K-2SO have not exactly gotten along throughout the movie. K was less than pleased with the fact that Jyn got a blaster when they left the Rebel base and he didn't. So, at the end of the movie, when everything is on the line, Jyn gives him a blaster to protect himself. It's just... so... sweet. It's like they're almost friends.
104. Cassian kills Tivik (Rogue One) - Who's Tivik? We don't really know, but we know he's a rebel. Either way, it's really not important. What is important is that in the first moments we get to see Cassian we see how much the rebellion means to him and to what lengths he's willing to go. Here's two guys on the same side, in a tight predicament and one is freaking out, likely to draw attention. So, Cassian pulls out his blaster and shoots him. Damn dude, that's cold. But oh my, that's bad ass. Definitely elicited a chuckle from me in the theaters as in "huh! Okay then!" I can't imagine how that conversation went back at the base though. "Cassian, where's Tivik." "Oh, he was freaking out. So I shot him." "Ummm......"
103. Lando starts helping (Empire Strikes Back) - Lando Calrissian is a scoundrel, much like his "friend" Han Solo. Lando looks out for one person, himself. So, it should come as no surprise that Lando betrays his friend and his friend's friends and sells them out to the Empire. After Darth Vader changes the deal they made several times Lando starts thinking maybe this isn't such a good idea, and starts helping our heroes. So, maybe he's not that much of a scoundrel after all.
102. Vader's Arrival (Return of the Jedi) - The last time we saw Darth Vader he was coming off a duel with Luke where he cut off Luke's hand and then said, "oh by the way, I'm your dad. I cut off your hand so that we'll match." (Or something like that). Now, here's this new Death Star and Vader shows up, unannounced and unexpected, and is all business. Then, "oh, by the way, the Emperor's coming so you better get moving and get this thing working or I'll crush your windpipe and kill you."
101. The destruction of Jedha City (Rogue One) - The latest Star Wars movie doesn't tell us much about Jedha other than that it boasts a bountiful supply of kyber crystals, and home to Saw Guerrera's insurgents. So, in the end, I didn't really care much about Jedha being destroyed, but boy was that awesome to watch. The Death Star can destroy planets. But, the Empire didn't want to push the limit too soon, so they settled for destroying a city. To do so, they clearly needed to eclipse the sun. Okay, they didn't have to, but I'm glad they did. Also, sure, they didn't destroy the whole planet, but how far away did that tidal wave of debris go? I'm not thinking Jedha is very livable after that, so why not just blow the whole thing up. Oh, right... because Alderaan has to be the first planet to blow up.
100. Tarkin resurrected (Rogue One) - Making a direct prequel to a movie 39 years after the original debuted presents some challenges, actors age, or in other cases die, so.... what do you do with their characters? Luckily, in 2016 the technology exists to superimpose the older/deceased actors' younger faces over body doubles. Not sure how that works with the legal decision from Back to the Future II, but I assume it was done legally. Tarkin was a great character in the original movie and seeing him back on the screen, and even though it was at times clearly CGI in Rogue One, it was still pretty cool to see him back in action. Certainly a better looking recreation than at the end of "Revenge of the Sith."
99. Chewie commandeers AT-ST (Return of the Jedi) - As the Battle of Endor rages, Chewbacca and a few
98. Starkiller base fires (Force Awakens) - Say what you want about "The Force Awakens" being a remake of "A New Hope," but it's still a great addition to the series. And, to be fair, we all know history repeats itself, so why is it unthinkable that the Empire/First Order would try to build another Death Star, again and again? This time though, it's not just a Death Star, it's a whole freaking planet. Watching the movie, you can tell it's bigger than the Death Star, but seeing the two side-by-side at the rebel bass gives you a better appreciation for its size. The ray gun is damn impressive. It takes out a whole planetary system! Imagine firing a laser the size of Mexico (don't tell the President that, he may abandon the wall for another project). But the question I have is how do you aim it? The one ray splits off into several and travels to destroy different planets. So, are you really shooting multiple rays that just originate from the same point and appear to be one? Also, it sucks up the energy from the sun, until the sun is depleted. Then what? It's still a planet. Planets revolve around their sun. So, without a sun, Starkiller base just drifts aimlessly through space? Also, how does the aiming process work with the planetary rotation? Do you have to aim ahead of your target to accommodate for the rotation of the planet, a "lead the receiver," if you will? So many questions. The scene is awesome, and now my head hurts.
97. Destruction of Alderaan (A New Hope) - A much simpler planetary destruction. One ray. One target. One entire planet destroyed. Like a few other things on this "best of" list, this isn't a happy moment, but that doesn't mean it can't be awesome. Here you have a captured Princess Leia being interrogated for the location of the rebel base, at the threat of destroying her home planet (as opposed to her birth asteroid. Boom. Roasted). Knowing what's at stake, she tells the Empire the rebel base is on Dantooine. Is it? Maybe. We don't know. We never find out. Either way, the Empire doesn't care and ruthlessly destroys Alderaan anyway. I think the worst thing about this moment is, after watching the prequels, it means Jimmy Smits is dead. That's sad.
96. Death Star Gun Assembly (Rogue One) - It's like when you're playing Jenga and take out the last piece and carefully put it on the top and take a step back to admire your work. There was a sense of relief and accomplishment when watching this scene. It just felt right.
95. Second Death Star fires (Return of the Jedi) - While we're on the topic of Death Stars, why not mention how crazy it was when the second Death Star fired on the rebel fleet. The thing doesn't even have it's own shields yet, the main gun isn't supposed to be operational which is why the rebels attacked when they did. Then out of nowhere, bam! Rebel ship gone! Imagine tying your little brother's arms behind his back and then still taking a fist to the jaw. How'd that happen?!
94. Starkiller base explodes (Force Awakens) - The explosions of both Death Stars are great cinematic moments, beautiful to watch. But the explosion of Starkiller base, approximately a gazillion times bigger than both Death Stars, is so much prettier (until you think about how many First Order people were on the planet - sure they're bad guys, but still, that's a lot of lost lives.). Anyway..... on the plus side, the planet turned into a sun to replace the one Starkiller base sucked up and destroyed. So, now the other planets in the system have something to revolve around. Might mess up their climates though.... Hmm.... #notmyproblem
93. Obi-Wan jumps through window after assassin droid (Attack of the Clones) - Don't watch the whole video, just the first 20 seconds. Jango Fett hired Zam Wessell to kill Senator Amidala. Zam used assassin droids but her Jedi protectors thwarted the attempt. In an effort to find the assassin, Obi-Wan just dives head first out the window and grabs onto the droid. What?! That's not like him! Obi-Wan is the methodical one that always has a plan. Anakin is the wild impulsive one. This seems like a total role reversal, but I'm so glad it happened this way. Sure Obi-Wan killed Darth Maul in Episode I, but he was the calming voice to Qui-Gonn's rebellious personality. So, to now have Obi-Wan be the bold one that jumps out windows, makes him a more formidable character. I mean, Coruscant is such a developed planet that no one knows what the surface looks like. You wouldn't survive jumping out of a ten story building and here's Obi-Wan leaping out a thousand-plus story building onto a flying droid. BASE JUMPING EXTREME!
92. Finn rescues Poe (Force Awakens) - As soon as Finn took off his helmet upon their return from Jakku, you knew that he was a good guy. He was all over the trailers as a good guy. He was seen holding a blue lightsaber for crying out loud. So, for the audience there was as much surprise that he was the trooper rescuing Poe as there was for us when Luke rescued Leia. For the one being rescued, probably all the surprise in the world. This was a great scene because of the back-and-forth dialogue regarding how they're going to escape and who has what parts of the plan. This scene was really just one "aren't you a little short for a stormtrooper," line from being a classic... wait.
91. Rey and Finn escape Jakku (Force Awakens) - Again, I don't know much about Jakku, the Battle of Jakku, the inhabitants of Jakku, or who Unkar Plutt (played by Simon Pegg - SURPRISE!) is and why he seems to be in charge. But regardless, there was a battle, a lot of ships crashed and haven't gone anywhere. Instead, they're being picked apart slowly by scavengers for portions, or fractions of portions of.... bread? So, Rey, who we have no knowledge of being a pilot, and Finn, who we know isn't a pilot, climb about the Millennium Falcon and try to outrun a pair of TIE Fighters. To do so, they fly THROUGH a Star Destroyer. Also, how cool is it that when Finn manages to get the gun stuck (what is it with Stormtroopers and guns?), Rey flops the Falcon over so that Finn has a shot at the last TIE Fighter?
90. Trash Compactor Scene (A New Hope) - This is really the first time we get to see the main heroes of the trilogy all together in one place. The dynamic between the hothead Han Solo, feisty Princess Leia, and the "everybody shut up, can't we all just get along" Luke Skywalker is funny and entertaining. It's a wonder they ever managed to get along, fall in love, and/or
89. Vader chokes the rebel (A New Hope) - As mentioned previously, Darth Vader is a badass. The guy can do whatever he wants, except maybe breathe on his own (too soon?). He's so desperate to find the stolen Death Star plans that he just straight up grabs a rebel by the throat, hoists him up in the air, starts asking him questions and tosses him across the room. How can you not take some kind of enjoyment in that?
88. Death Star Escape (Return of the Jedi) - In movies, there's very little suspense when a main character is put in a perilous position. What movie is going to kill off it's protagonist? But, hey, none of the main heroes are involved in the second Death Star battle. So, when Lando is piloting the Millennium Falcon and takes out the Death Star and almost gets consumed in a fireball, there is some doubt... some... that he might not make it. But would they really let the saga's best ship be destroyed? No, probably not. Also, I can't help but imitate/chuckle along with Nien Nunb every. single. time.
87. Anakin's Crash Landing (Revenge of the Sith) - After battling General Grievous to, we'll call it a draw, Anakin, Obi-Wan, and the Chancellor are stuck on a sinking ship. (Can we call them sinking ships?) Anakin, being one of the best star pilots in the galaxy takes the controls. Obi-Wan asks if he can "fly a cruiser like this?" And Anakin responds with the ever helpful "you mean, do I know how to fly what's left of this thing?" When Obi-Wan takes exception to this response, because frankly, wrong time and wrong place Anakin, the sarcastic young Skywalker says "under the circumstances, I'd say the ability to pilot this thing is irrelevant." Haha. Good one. Also, I love Obi-Wan's dry sense of humor when a good portion of the ship falls off and he says "don't worry. We're still flying half a ship." HA! I'm curious though, how, after half the ship fell off, the flames acquired on re-entry didn't make their way up the hallways to the bridge? Also, what happened to the back half of the ship? Where did it land and how many people died? I also pray that they saw the ship coming in far enough in advance to evacuate the control tower that they knocked over. I get that the Chancellor and two Jedi are on the ship, but you're telling me three lives on an utterly destroyed ship are more valuable than those on the ground working their everyday jobs? Oh, wait, the three on the ship have to be in the three movies that take place after this? Okay, fair enough.
86. Millennium Falcon lands at lightspeed (Force Awakens) - Is Han Solo skilled at what he does or just really lucky? Judging by the facial expression he makes when they come out of lightspeed and start trying to land on Starkiller base, I'm leaning more towards lucky. But hey, if it works, right? Think about how fast the speed of light is. We can't really even fathom that since we've only broken the sound barrier. But if we could imagine that, picture yourself traveling at lightspeed straight at Mountain that will still crush you, but you put on the brakes just in time to not die. That's what Han Solo did. He's crazy... but the best kind of crazy.
85. Obi-Wan appears on Padme's ship (Revenge of the Sith) - Anakin and Padme are having a lover's spat about his turn to the dark side, which makes your argument with your significant others about not making the bed seem pretty insignificant. Anakin thinks Obi-Wan put her up to it, she denies it but, surprise! Obi-Wan is standing in the doorway of her ship like a badass. The scene isn't written very well, but I love this moment of Anakin seeing Obi-Wan at the top of the ramp. Maybe it's the pose, maybe it's how well Ewan McGregor wears Jedi robes. I don't know, but next time I'm ever at the top of a ramp looking down on someone, I hope I look this cool. I also hope, the next time I open double doors coming inside, I look as cool as Aragorn, but I doubt it.84. Anakin fights with two lightsabers (Attack of the Clones) - After Obi-Wan gets injured fighting Count Dooku, because Anakin's a jerk and rushed into fight him first and got electrocuted, Obi-Wan tosses his lightsaber to Anakin who now has two. It doesn't last very long because Count Dooku cuts Anakin's green lightsaber in half rendering it useless. But it's still pretty cool while it lasts. But, if you can cut the handle of a lightsaber in half, why wouldn't everyone do this all the time? Also, wouldn't that have made Darth Maul's lightsaber useless when Obi-Wan cut it in half? I mean it is a double-sided lightsaber, so if Obi-Wan caught it exactly in the middle it would turn it into two lightsabers, but if he caught it closer to one end than the other it would be useful only on one side. Now, what about the other issue, of why does no one force push the button on their opponents lightsaber?
83. Palpatine uses force lightning (Return of the Jedi) - As I mentioned earlier, I believe the first time you watch Star Wars, you should watch the movies in the order in which they were released. Given that mindset, so far all we've seen of the Emperor is a hologram, him walking around talking to Vader, and sitting in his throne room. Sure, he's a bad guy, but does he actually do anything? Well, as Luke is about to beat Vader, Palpatine thinks he's about to convert Luke to the Dark Side and then Luke says no. So... BAM! FORCE LIGHTNING! Again, I was eight years old the first time I watched the original trilogy. When Palpatine started shooting lightning out of his hands I was like "WHAT?!?!?!" How did he do that?!" We've all tried to wave our hand to do a Jedi mind trick, or done an inverted "I love you" signal to try and shoot spider webs out of our wrists, but we've also tried to lock up our finger joints like the Emperor to shoot lightning our of our hands, admit it.
82. Jyn Erso's Speech (Rogue One) - "A New Hope" made the rebellion look like this well-oiled machine. Everybody was fighting for the same cause, there was structure, there were plans, and everything was peaches and cream. This scene is great because it shows you that, yea, they're rebels and everyone is in it to take down the Empire, but everyone has a different idea as to how to do that, and what is the biggest reason why it needs to be done. The whole plot of "Rogue One" and "A New Hope" is to destroy the Death Star. In "A New Hope," the Death Star plans are already stolen. How? You don't know. But you assume that it was a well organized, stealthy, put together plan. WRONG. It was accomplished by a small group of rebels that knew it had to be done, despite everyone else deciding against it. It's nice to see that the rebellion was as chaotic as most rebellions tend to be.
81. Cassian believes in Jyn (Rogue One) - I can't seem to find this scene on YouTube, and I'm not about to upload it myself and run the risk of getting fined, but chances are, if you're reading this, you know the scene I'm talking about. Jyn just got shut down by the Rebel council in her plans to try to go steal the plans to the Death Star (in the speech listed just above). She's ticked, and rightfully so. Her father died to protect the secret of the flaw in the Death Star and left her with the knowledge of how to obtain the plans. Then, just at the peak of her frustration Cassian comes out of nowhere with a group of rebels and says that he believes her. Now, they're essentially the main two characters, so it's not a surprise that they're going to be on the same team, but up to this point they were very much at odds with each other. But in this moment Cassian realizes that as much as he believes in the rebellion, some of their tactics and decisions aren't the right ones. So, he decides to go with Jyn to steal the plans on Scarif. Is this a counter-rebellion? A rebel rebellion? Or maybe a rebellion²? It's a touching moment too, when the troops disperse and Jyn and Cassian circle each other realizing that they're now
80. Luke uses the Force to lift C-3PO to scare the Ewoks (Return of the Jedi) - So, I debated putting this moment in the funniest moments column instead, but I genuinely just like this scene. Thanks to Chewbacca thinking with his stomach, our heroes get captured by the Ewoks, except for C-3PO, who the Ewoks revere as a god. Luke, Han, Chewie, and R2 are strapped to logs and on the verge of being cooked for dinner when 3PO tells the Ewoks, at Luke's suggestion, to let them go or he will become angry and show off his power. Of course, C-3PO is useless unless he's translating dialogue for R2, so what power could he have? Oh, Luke's going to make it happen! The Ewoks start freaking out that their god is flying, so they let everyone go. The best part is that 3PO honestly doesn't understand what's going on and believes that he levitated himself. Silly droid, tricks are Jedi.
79. "There is another" (Empire Strikes Back) - It's a quick moment in the grand scheme of the first Star Wars sequel, but as Luke is flying away to rescue Han and Leia in Cloud City. Obi-Wan's ghost and Yoda are trying to talk him out of leaving but, as Beru said (in one of her only lines) "he has too much of his father in him," he's too stubborn and leaves anyway. As he's flying away, ghost Obi-Wan says "that boy was our last hope." Yoda simply responds "no, there is another." Wait what?! You mean there's another force sensitive person in the galaxy? I mean, of course there has to be, right? Just because the Jedi are gone doesn't mean there aren't kids born that could be Jedi. Even so, at this point (because the prequels haven't come out yet) we're not really sure how many Jedi there used to be, so if the Sith "Rule of Two" applied to Jedi, it would make sense that there wouldn't be very many. Anyway, Yoda hinting that Luke's not the only one left is a bombshell moment that gets quickly overshadowed by the whole Vader vs. Luke battle minutes later. So much so that they brought this line back in more dramatic fashion in the next movie.
78. Luke gets his father's lightsaber (A New Hope) - As mentioned previously, this is the first time we see a lightsaber on camera. It's a pretty cool moment because who wouldn't want to have a lightsaber?! There's a lot to digest in this moment as well if you think about the saga as a whole. The fight between Anakin and Obi-Wan at the end of "Revenge of the Sith" obviously had to end with Anakin getting maimed, but you probably also noticed that the camera blatantly focuses on Obi-Wan picking up Anakin's lightsaber so as to give you the "oh, so that's how he had it to give to Luke in 'A New Hope'" moment. Originally it was "oh, Luke's dad is dead, and died when Luke was young, so he gave Obi-Wan his lightsaber and said 'give this to Luke when he's older.'" My how things change. Also, take into consideration the impact of "Force Awakens" on this scene. Rey finds this same lightsaber in Maz Kanata's basement and has a massive flashback to her past. Kylo Ren also wants this lightsaber, believing it belongs to him, being the Darth Vader fanboy that he is. Then, at the end of the movie, Rey standing there, holding the lightsaber in front of Luke. Let's also not forget the best thing to come out of this scene: that Luke Skywalker isn't the brightest kid on the moisture farm.
77. Obi-Wan explains the Force (A New Hope) - Another one that could have been paired with the one right before, but I'm just trying to
76. Force Ghosts (Return of the Jedi) - The Empire has fallen. The Emperor is Dead. Darth Vader became Anakin again and died. In a solemn moment away from the celebration on Endor Luke sees the ghosts of Obi-Wan and Yoda and slowly joined by the ghost of Anakin Skywalker. Now, the first time I watched "Jedi," prior to the prequels, I was blown away with how cool this scene was. The first time I saw this scene post prequels (with the substitution of Hayden Christensen for Sebastian Shaw), I was like "oh, that's cool." But I was in high school and didn't know better. But we'll come back to that.
75. Luke vs. Vader (Empire Strikes Back) - So, separated from the iconic exchange between the primary protagonist and antagonist of the series, as mentioned earlier, this fight is so one sided it's not even funny. Just as Obi-Wan and Yoda warned Luke, he's not ready to face Vader. He holds his own, as much as one could (better than Anakin did against Dooku the first time, ironically). But, Vader is just so much better a swordsman/Jedi/Sith at this point. Part of what I like about this scene though is the dialogue, mostly because it was the dialogue featured in the Darth Vader mask voice changer that we would use as kids when battling with lightsaber. The only problem was, the speaker on it, when using the microphone, was not loud enough so if you talked normally, your opponent could hear you more than they could hear your voice as Darth Vader. But the pre-programmed dialogue was straight from this scene. Ah to be young again...
74. Qui-Gon's funeral (Phantom Menace) - I distinctly remember standing in line waiting at the premiere of "Episode I" and saying to my dad and my friend Kevin that "I bet you the older Jedi guy (because I wasn't sure of his character name, or who Liam Neeson was - I was 11!) dies in this one. Because then it'd be like Obi-Wan dying in the original." They both laughed and said no way. Well, jokes on them! Seriously though, I would have been perfectly okay with being wrong. It's not that he died a bad death, but how are you going to kill of Liam Neeson in the first movie? Such as it is, it was cool to see his funeral, with the Jedi council, the Queen of Naboo, and the new chancellor in attendance, and in a similar way to Vader's funeral: burned in a pyre. Also, the conversation between Mace Windu and Yoda about Darth Maul definitely being a Sith Lord, with the unsurety of if he was the master or the apprentice while the camera rack focuses to the profile or Senator-turned-Chancellor Palpatine? It's like George Lucas is trying to tell us something. Oh... wait. As a kid though, I always questioned how they didn't know. It took me a while to realize that just because the audience knows, doesn't mean all the characters do, which is a fact that a lot of movies often overlook.
73. Obi-Wan's intro (A New Hope) - So, Luke goes searching across the desert for R2-D2, who's looking for Obi-Wan Kenobi, and gets knocked over the head by Sand People. Then out of nowhere, this loud noise (which seems to change needlessly every thirty years) scares the Sand People away. Luke wakes up to find Ben Kenobi tending to him. Luke tells Ben about the droid and his mission. It's impossible not to like the way Ben handles this. "Obi-Wan Kenobi. Obi-Wan... now that's a name I've not heard in a long time. A long time." Ok sure, but why? Oh, because you're messing with Luke! Then Luke has to ask if he knows him. Haha. Jokes on you Luke. "Of course I know him. He's me." As an eight year old watching this the first time, I was like "whoa, that's crazy." But honestly, there's no way you can't not see it coming. In a movie, even at eight years old, I figured it was unlikely that you'd have a main character looking for someone but settle for that someone's relative. It would be too big of a coincidence for Luke to find a Kenobi that wasn't Obi-Wan, and kind of stupid of him to say "oh, ok... you're good enough." But then again, Luke is the one that stared down the barrel of a lightsaber.
72. "These aren't the droids you're looking for" (A New Hope) - Imagine yourself, as a kid, like I was the first time I saw this movie. You're still fairly early into the movie and not quite sure what to make of the whole thing even though you really like it so far. But still, this whole Force thing...? Then, Obi-Wan busts out this whole "these aren't the droids you're looking for" business and the Stormtroopers just let them go. At first I'm thinking, wow that one Stormtrooper is really dumb for believing him, and those other ones are dumber for believing the first trooper. But then... wait... he's doing this subtle little hand wave thing. Is he forcing (pun intended?) them to believe him? He can do that? Wow! That would come in handy in every day life.
71. Podracing (Phantom Menace) - For all their faults, the prequels did do a few things right. One of them was podracing. Much like owning a lightsaber, you almost can't be a fan of Star Wars if you don't want to give podracing a try. It's fast, it's furious (hey, that might make a good name for a movie), it's exciting. Ironically, it's probably the scene in which Jake Lloyd delivers his best performance and he doesn't even have any lines, but he acts well through his facial expressions. When Anakin tells Qui-Gonn he's the only human that can do it, Qui-Gon says "you must have Jedi reflexes." I mean, we know he does, but does that mean that all pod racers have Jedi reflexes? I think Sebulba would make a pretty terrible Jedi. Rats Terrell maybe, though.... Perhaps one of my favorite parts of the scene is that it became blatantly obvious to me, right away, that the English speaking head of the two-headed announcer was voiced by Greg Proops. Given that it's 1999 and "Whose Line is it Anyway?" (the Drew Carey version) was at its peak, this was a very exciting moment for me. Plus, this scene inspired one of the more entertaining N64 video games. In turn, the video game gives the scene in the movie more meaning because you know which racers are better, like Gasgano, Odi Mandrell, Mars Guo, Mawhonic, or Ebe Endocott (a personal favorite as I live in Endicott - but he wasn't very good to race with), etc. In fact, now I kinda want to go play that game for a bit. BRB.
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Okay, I'm back.
70. The Wookiees! (Revenge of the Sith) - Okay, so here's the thing about including Kashyyyk (which probably doesn't need three y's in it) in "Revenge of the Sith," the whole thing feels like a giant Easter Egg. Am I upset with that? No. Han's line of "droids don't tear people's arms out of their sockets when they lose" in "A New Hope" kind of made me want to know more about wookiees. Unfortunately the original trilogy painted the picture that Chewbacca was, at the very least, an endangered species, if not the last of his kind. Then BOOM! A whole planet of Wookiees! AND!!! They're badasses! They're not really afraid of anything. I mean, to be fair, they're fighting droids which they dwarf in every aspect (except for the spider droids and NR-N99 Persuader Class Droid Enforcers). I'm still not sure exactly how Yoda has "good relations" with the Wookiees. There's a prequel I want to see: When Yoda met Chewbacca.
69. "Begun the Clone War has" (Attack of the Clones) - This scene is pretty epic. After a slow moving Episode I and parts of Episode II that dragged on for a while, finally we're getting to the good stuff. Oh, you mean that's all going to be in a cartoon on TV? Why? Oh well. At least this scene is awesome! Look at all those clones! It's also pretty cool to see the leaders of the Republic standing on the balcony overseeing the army's departure to the far reaches of the galaxy. Talk about a war springing up over night! If anything, this scene is awesome for the shots of the troopers all standing in rank and file while the (not) Star Destroyers take off.
68. Cantina Scene (A New Hope) - So here's the thing about this scene. I honestly wasn't sure where to put it. Is it one of my favorites? Depends on the mood I'm in when I watch the movies. It's certainly not one of the worst scenes, so I couldn't put it in the next section I'm going to write, so I guess it has to go in the "best" section. The first time I watched these movies I thought this was a weired scene. Everything looked old and dated, in terms of the costuming, and when I told my dad that he responded with something along the lines of "but you have to realize when this came out in 1977, no one had ever seen anything like this before, so it was crazy!" Which definitely made me appreciate this scene more. If anything, it has to be on the list again because of Family Guy's portrayal of the band. To be fair though, Figrin D'an and the Modal Nodes (yes, that's apparently their name, because... of course it is) do play a second song. That song can be heard in the background as Obi-Wan and Luke meet Han Solo for the first time.
67. "Run Luke, Run" (A New Hope) - Luke just saw Obi-Wan die at the hands of Darth Vader in a lightsaber duel and is pretty shaken by it... for all of ten seconds, at which point he here's his fallen mentor's voice telling him to "run Luke, run." Again, as an eight-year-old watching this movie I was baffled. He just died! How is he doing that?! Wow! I mean, he did just tell Vader "if you strike me down, I'll become more powerful than you could possibly imagine." I guess he was right. I wonder, if Darth Vader knew what he meant, would he have killed him?
66. TR-8R (Force Awakens) - Again, I know his call letters are not actually TR-8R, but it's still a pretty cool moment and a pretty cool fight in the movie. I mean, here you have Finn, who has become a good guy, but as Palpatine pointed out at the opera, "good is a point of view." What must Finn's fellow troopers think of him? Well, obviously they're not overly fond of him, as evidenced by this scene. It's also funny to watch Finn try and use a lightsaber after he didn't even know what it was when he told Maz he needed a weapon, she grabbed his wrist and said, "you have one." Haha! It baffles me though, with all the things that lightsabers can cut through that there are weapons that can match a lightsaber in terms of not getting cut in half. Why doesn't every stormtrooper have one of these or these?
65. The Resistance arrives and Poe kicks ass (Force Awakens) - So, Poe disappeared about twenty minutes after he was introduced, which wasn't cool. Oscar Isaacs had mega billing in this movie and was barely in it (although, Mark Hamill had top billing and didn't even have a single line). It's a pretty cool scene if only for the reaction of Han, Finn, and Chewie being taken captive by the First Order and then in awe of the Resistance troops arriving. But then the battle ensues and Poe just goes off! He takes down a handful of TIE Fighters and several ground troops in one fluid pass around the scene. Finn then remarks "that's one hell of a pilot," yea, no kidding. You know this first hand. You helped him steal a TIE Fighter. But, oh, that's right. You don't know it's him yet. If you did, you would have taken his jacket off.
64. Speeder Bike Chase (Return of the Jedi) - Like Podracing, driving a speeder bike through
63. TIE Fighter Dog Fight (A New Hope) - This is another scene that is made infinitely better by the Family Guy spoof, especially when Peter as Han sings the score to the scene, as we all do when watching the real movie. This is really the first space battle we see in the Star Wars saga, which makes it not just iconic, but pretty great as well. But, it's not without its faults. The obvious example is that the last fighter is a lot closer to the camera when Han is targeting it than it is when he blows it up. The other, and this always confuses me - WHAT ARE THE PHYSICS INSIDE THE MILLENNIUM FALCON?! What do I mean? Han and Luke are on the main level when Han climbs up, Luke climbs down to get to the gunner positions. Both are sitting perfectly upright in their seats despite being oriented differently than they were when standing on the main level. Han should be sitting with his head and shoulders pinned to the back of the seat and Luke should be need a shoulder harness to keep in his seat. Sure, they're in space and there's no gravity in space, so this makes sense (if they're buckled in, which they're not), but if there's no gravity in space, why can they walk on the main level? Then, they turn and talk to each other like it's a hallway and not a silo-like tunnel. Also, the TIE Fighters are seen approaching the Falcon from the sides, with a slightly high approach, and yet, Han and Luke are shooting at them straight on, despite themselves being on the top and bottom of their ship. Even on Jakku in "Force Awakens," when there is clearly gravity, Rey is sitting in the cockpit upright, Finn is sitting in the lower gunner position also sitting upright. NOT POSSIBLE! I'm so confused.
62. Millennium Falcon attacks and hides on Star Destroyer (Empire Strikes Back) - I've said it before, I'll say it again, I'm not sure if Han Solo is good or lucky. This takes some pretty good talent though, I mean, we don't know the odds of surviving a head on attack of a Star Destroyer because Leia shuts C-3PO up before he can tell us, but I'm guessing they're not very good. Yet, Han pilots the Falcon right at the bridge of the Star Destroyer and then hides on the back of it to no longer appear on their scopes. How does one even think of trying this, let alone whether or not it'll work? So, the Falcon disappears, we cut to a scene on Dagobah with Yoda, and then cut back to the Falcon on the back of the Star Destroyer, for me, eliciting the reaction of "haha! that's awesome!" But, there are several other ships around them, how did none of them see Han do this, or see the Falcon on the backside of the Star Destroyer? The plot hole thickens.
61. R2-D2 uses rockets (Attack of the Clones) - Anakin and Padme just fell onto a conveyor belt and C-3PO gets pushed off the same ledge onto the same conveyor belt by R2-D2, but R2 doesn't fall because he has rockets in his legs. WHAT?! R2 can fly? That's awesome! I mean, I'm not sure why he never used them in the original series, despite the many opportunities to do so, but hey, better late (or early) than never, right?
60. Vader stops Han's blaster shot (Empire Strikes Back) - Again, it's a matter of what the Force can allow you to do. The doors to the dining room open, Darth Vader's at the table. WHAT?! Didn't see that coming. Han takes out his blaster, because obviously this is a great time to kill the galaxy's biggest bad guy, but wait... Vader stops all the blaster shots with his hand! And then uses the Force to steal Han's blaster from him. That's pretty badass.
59. Count Dooku's last fight and death (Revenge of the Sith) - Like most of the prequels, the dialogue is clunky, but the fight is pretty cool: two Jedi vs one Sith Lord? The worst part about it is how quickly Obi-Wan was taken out of the fight (and how fake it looked when Dooku dropped the balcony on him). But Anakin battled Dooku pretty well single handedly because, apparently, his powers doubled since the last time they met (which we'll get to later). Anakin wins the battle, cuts off Dooku's hands, catches Dooku's lightsaber in and then, at the chancellor's urging, scissor blades Dooku's head off. It's amazing that he ever turned to the Dark Side. I never saw it coming!
58. Vader's Entrance (Rogue One) - Silhouettes are powerful and creepy. Darth Vader's silhouette is terrifying. As the blast doors open into whatever weird room Director Krennic is standing in and Vader starts walking towards him. What's worse than one silhouette? Two silhouettes. The first is cast on the wall behind Krennic, the other from the reverse angle when Vader is too backlit to make out anything other than his outline. You can see in Krennic's eyes how terrifying this really is. I mean, it's not like he's delivering good news, but even if he were, I'm pretty sure he'd still be shaking in his boots. Not seen in the video clip linked is Vader soaking in the bacta tank, which is a fun but tragic look into what his life has become as a result of turning to the Dark Side. I guess Yoda was right after all.
57. Everything Chirrut Îmwe does (Rogue One) - Aside from having one of the more memorable mantra's in the saga: "I am with the Force and the Force is with me," the blind Force Sensitive-adjacent Guardian of the Whills is pretty awesome in... everything. I kind of think he's actually Daredevil, where even though he can't see he can still see. Sure, the Force is clearly strong with him or strong-adjacent, since he's not really a Jedi, but there's still no reason he should be able to fight the way he does. I would love to see him take on Yoda, Mace Windu, Count Dooku, Anakin, Darth Vader (shut up I know they're the same, but they're not. Spoiler alert for later), or Luke and see how that goes. I think, somehow inexplicably, Chirrut would beat some of them. Because he's just that
56. Death Star on the horizon (Rogue One) - Yet another repeat of iconic moments that I really enjoyed because, cinematically, it's a beautiful shot. Terrifying, but beautiful. Imagine being on any planet, in this case Scarif, and seeing on the horizon a space station capable of destroying the planet, like the one you're standing on. Tell me you wouldn't start crying. You can't.
55. Death Star Explodes (A New Hope) - The resolution of the climax of the original movie features one of the biggest explosions in film history. Maybe not in how big the explosion was while filming, but rather if you consider how big the Death Star was to scale, then name me an explosion bigger. In hindsight, there's not a whole lot of suspense that the Death Star won't explode before destroying the Rebel bass on Yavin 4 because Princess Leia is there, and you're not going to kill off one of your main heroes (sorry Obi-Wan). But at the same time, you're typically not going to let the home planet of one of the heroes be destroyed either.... hmmm... That being said, as a kid watching this for the first time, I definitely was a little anxious as the countdown sequence to firing the Death Star laser was underway and they had their fingers on the sliders ready to fire, just as it exploded. Phew! On the flip side though, Luke is a mass murderer. Think of how many people were on the Death Star when it blew up. Sure they're all Imperial employees, but not all of them had to be bad, right?
54. Luke Force grabs lightsaber (Empire Strikes Back) - As previously mentioned, this is the first time we see this "Accio" power of the Force. Luke's hanging upside down because I guess that's how Wampa's prepare their food, and sees his lightsaber in a nearby snow bank. Naturally he's going to try to reach for it, but he's too far away. It's instinctual, but yea, right! Then he closes his eyes to focus himself and reaches again. I'm like, yea, if it didn't work the first time, it's not going to work now. Wait, why is that lightsaber moving?! Dad, why is that lightsaber moving?! Oh my God, he just grabbed it with the Force! That's nuts! On another note, after he kills/maims the Wampa and leaves the cave, you can hear the sound of him deactivating his lightsaber, yet as he leaves the cave, the blade is still fully extended. Whoever's job to catch that that was probably got fired.
53. "Never tell me the odds" (Empire Strikes Back) - I think this settles the debate of Han being lucky vs Han being good. As he's about to attempt to navigate the asteroid field, C-3PO tells Han that the odds of doing so successfully are 3,720:1 to which Han replies "never tell me the odds." Apparently that's all 3PO is good for in this movie since he does it three times (once on Han regarding Luke's and Han's survival outside overnight, once about the asteroid field, and once about attacking a Star Destroyer - how original of him). Han's response though, is classic. It's arrogant. It's cocky. It's bold. So, does it actually settle the debate as to whether he's lucky or good? No, not really. If he's lucky then he doesn't want to hear the odds because the odds don't matter, because he'll survive regardless. If he's good, then the he doesn't want to hear the odds because he knows he can do it. But, as we learn in the "Force Awakens" when he's about to leave the hangar of his cargo ship at lightspeed, Rey asks if it's going to work and Han says "I never ask that question until after I've done it." So.... lucky (or too reckless to care).
52. Jump to lightspeed (all movies) - This is one of my favorite moments because of how visually pleasing it is (even if it is impossible. Why? Aside from travelling at the speed of light being itself impossible? How about the fact that if you could do so, the stars wouldn't zoom by you, because they're not close enough to you to do so.). And, because, living in the northeast I get to pretend I'm driving at lightspeed almost every night all winter long.
51. Vader Force chokes Imperial Officer (A New Hope) - Again, the first time we see this particular Force power demonstrated. Darth Vader's standing there getting ridiculed by this little punk of an officer because "oh look at me, I work on the Death Star. No one can touch me!" Turns out, you don't even need to be touched to get hurt. What did you think was going to happen when you taunt a Sith lord? Sure, you may believe that the Jedi's "ancient religion" is outdated, but you're old enough to have been alive during the Republic to know what Jedi could do. You know Vader is a former Jedi. I don't see where you think taunting him is a good idea. But you did, and now he's holding his hand up in the air and cutting off your ability to breathe. Congratulations. Until he did it, I, as a viewer, wasn't sure he could. But wow, I didn't want to mess with him before and now I definitely don't want to mess with him. I do have to applaud the acting by Richard LeParmentier though. Have you ever tried to recreate being choked like him and make the veins in your neck and head pop? It's not easy.
50. Opening tracking shot (Revenge of the Sith) - Parts of this movie make it my favorite in the franchise, but other parts totally ruin it. This is one of the former. One cool thing that I like about Star Wars is that all of the movies start with a ship going somewhere. Thankfully, Disney has (so far) continues this tradition. In Episode III we get not just an epic space battle, but one single continuous shot for 1:14. It's also great for the moment that Anakin's and Obi-Wan's ships dive down over the edge of the Star Destroyer and descend upon the battle and my first reaction in 2005 was "oh geez," yea, we'll go with geez. It may not be as long or (because of the use of CGI) epic as the opening tracking shot in Spectre, but it's still pretty cool.
49. Yoda's arrival with reinforcements on Geonosis (Attack of the Clones) - After an epic battle between dozens of Jedi and thousands of battle droids, the Jedi (somehow) are overwhelmed and seconds away from execution. Now, even if the droids start firing at the Jedi in execution style, you know that several of them can't die because either a) they're in the original trilogy or b) they're played by Samuel L. Jackson, still though, while you're not necessarily afraid they're going to die, you are thinking "how are they going to get out of this? Then BAM! CLONES EVERYWHERE! And look who's leading them. It's Yoda. Awesome, Yoda is.
48. Hoth Assault (Empire Strikes Back) - The first major ground battle is a fun one to watch. We know the Empire has all sorts of crazy weaponry like the former Death Star, Star Destroyers, and the like, but now they have giant walking robot camels?! Who's jaw didn't drop the first time they saw the AT-ATs walking across the snow? The music, as it so often does, definitely helps make the scene as epic as it is. How about the snowspeeders zooming around the AT-ATs trying to fire at them to no avail and then thinking maybe if we switch to harpoons and tow-cables. Here's a conundrum though... the AT-AT's have shields to deflect blaster fire, yet, when they get tripped up and fall to the ground and then all of a sudden are susceptible to blaster fire. Ummm... why? If I'm wearing a rain coat and I'm staying dry, but I trip and fall, the rain isn't going to get me any more wet because I'm on the ground.
47. Luke's Death Star Trench Run (A New Hope) - Really the entire battle is great. I'm not sure I think it's fair that the named the fat guy in the X-Wing "Porkins." But Luke's trench run, specifically, is pretty great. At first viewing, I was really upset with the Rebels that Luke was "Red 5." Red 5?! Don't they know he's the main character, but apparently the 5th most important pilot? Now that I'm older I realize that he's Red 5 because he's the newest guy to party. He's untested, unproven, he can't be just thrust into a leadership role. What are his qualifications? You knew that if anyone was going to be the one to blow up the Death Star that it was going to be Luke, because.... plot. But even so, the way it happened, with Obi-Wan's force ghost voice telling Luke to turn off his targeting computer and use the Force, and Darth Vader having Luke locked on target just in time for Han to save the day, it's all pretty epic.
46. Galactic celebration (Return of the Jedi) - Here's a scene that, in some respect, is better after George Lucas Lucased all over it. After the prequels the galaxy became much bigger than it was previously, so it makes total sense to include Tatooine, Bespin, Naboo, and Coruscant all celebrating the fall of the emperor. Word travels fast, I guess. I especially like seeing the scene on Coruscant where they topple the statute of the emperor with the Jedi Temple-turned-Imperial Palace in the background. But this scene is not without its faults, which, like so many other things, we'll get back to later on.
45. R2-D2 shoots Luke's new lightsaber (Return of the Jedi) - Luke needed a new lightsaber after his first one was lost on Cloud City and he needed to hide it in R2 because he knew there was a very good chance that Jabba would take him captive, search him, and take away his lightsaber. So, on the brink of execution, he does a surprise springboard jump back up off the skiff plank and catches the lightsaber R2 shoots at him. It's all pretty epic. But personally, I like it because it's the first time we see a green lightsaber, and green is my favorite color.
44. Ewoks, in general, but specifically Ewoks fighting (Return of the Jedi) - Ewoks are awesome. There, I said it. They talk funny, they're adorable, and they're hilarious yet handy in a fight. For the most part they get wrecked in battle, but then things turn around and their fighting tactics actually start working. Who wasn't at least a little sad when the two Ewoks get wrecked and one sits up likely concussed and tries to wake the other who is clearly dead. It's tragic. I totally understand why people don't like Ewoks, but I'm on the right side of the Ewok line (adjusted for my being born after Jedi came out).
43. Obi-Wan rides Boga (Revenge of the Sith) - I LOVE BOGA! I'm not even calling him a boga. I'm calling him Boga. That's his name. Not his species. Which, according to Wookieepedia, is correct, but I didn't know that until after I wrote the previous sentences and I don't want to delete them because it's my blog and I'm stubborn. Also, Boga is a she. I'm still calling her a him. Not that it matters in the slightest. I think it's mostly the noise that Boga makes that is so great, she looks awesome though too, I mean, who wouldn't want a varactyl? And yes, mine would be called Boga. All of the deaths in "Revenge of the Sith" and I think Boga's is the saddest. Just listen to her wail as she and Obi-Wan are blasted off the cliff! Although, they landed in water and if Obi-Wan survived, I'm sure Boga did too. It's never really shown one way or the other, but that's what I'm choosing to believe.
42. Kylo Ren vs Rey/Finn (Force Awakens) - Any climactic lightsaber duel is bound to be fun to watch, but in hindsight, this one is probably higher on my list than it should be, but I've come so far and it would take too long to adjust everything to move this down. Still though, Kylo Ren takes on two heroes in one battle, while injured, and emotionally all over the place because he's psychotic. Luke's lightsaber seems to want to belong to Rey despite Kylo Ren really wanting it himself. It's cool to see Kylo Ren's lightsaber in action. The unstable blade is something new and exciting, and the two mini blades on the hilt look really cool, although seem to make his style of fighting kind of clunky, so as to not injure himself. But some of the moves, as a result, look pretty cool and he's obviously a good swordsman. But here's the thin, he's presumably been doing this for most of his life whereas Finn has never held a lightsaber before and Rey, if she has in her past, hasn't in recent memory. So, why was this fight even remotely closed to evenly matched?! I mean, sure, Finn got injured badly, but Rey injured Kylo Ren more than he did anything to her. If we're being honest, Finn and Rey should be dead.
41. Luke vs. Vader rematch (Return of the Jedi) - Again, assuming you watch the series in the order the movies were released, this is the best lightsaber fight to date. Luke is finally evenly matched with Vader after their previous fight which was a debacle, for lack of a better word. There's also a lot of raw emotion going on here. Luke's trying to fight the draw to the Dark Side (which, he apparently has?) and Vader is trying to taunt his son to join him and also learns that Luke is one half of a set of twins. I love Luke's reaction to Vader saying maybe Leia will turn if he doesn't. He just screams and starts going off. He's flailing his lightsaber around much like any guy does in an action movie when he pulls out a knife (seriously, why do guys in movies become the sloppiest fighters when they have a knife in their hands). Yet, this is effective. He starts winning the fight on raw emotion, fear, anger, hate (and yet, somehow doesn't cross to the Dark Side. Plot hole?). It's a great father-son bonding moment.
40. Mace Windu vs Palpatine (Revenge of the Sith) - First off, major props to Samuel L. Jackson on his annunciation of the t's when he says "noT yeT." Always made me smirk a bit. Anyway... In my, likely controversial opinion, Episode III has some of the best action scenes in the entire saga. This one has it's faults, for sure, which I'll get to later. But, in the meantime, it's really cool to finally see Palpatine do something. He's been ousted as the Sith Lord and the Jedi are trying to arrest him. Mace Windu, who's no slouch with a lightsaber, takes him on and it's a pretty epic battle. A lot of the choreography that went into the fight is pretty impressive. A lot of turns and dodges that look very artsy for a lightsaber duel. The shot where they blow out the window is pretty impressive and it sets up the next moment on my list.
39. Mace Windu's Death (Revenge of the Sith) - I'm not saying I liked that Mace Windu died. I actually hated it. But, you knew it had to happen. That's the downside of a prequel trilogy - those characters that are in the originals, you're not afraid for them when they're in trouble, and those characters that aren't, you usually have to explain how they die. Windu was the latter. You knew he had to die and you just hope they did it justice. I think they did. Deaths in movies can be hard. You don't want to shortchange a character by giving them a silly death (Bane, anyone?). I'm not sure what I was expecting from Mace Windu's death, but I'm okay with the result. He went out fighting to maintain/regain what was left of the Republic and defeat the Sith all in one fell swoop. And, for the time being, until I get to the next section of worst moments, I'll leave it at that.
38. Vader puts on helmet (Empire Strikes Back) - So, what is Darth Vader? We know he's tall, dressed all in black, breathes more ominously than anyone in the history of forever. Other than that, we don't know much. In the next movie, after we find out that Darth Vader and Anakin are the same person, ghost Obi-Wan describes him as "more machine now than man." But just watching the first movie and the first half of Empire, there's no reason to think that Vader couldn't just be all robot. I mean, I'll admit the first time I saw Stormtroopers I thought they were robots, and then when Luke and Han put on the uniform I was kind of confused. But, if they had been robots, what's preventing Vader from also being a robot? (and by robot I mean droid, obviously) But, then this scene happens and, whoa, Vader's a person. Not only is Vader a person, but he's a deformed person. What the hell happened to him. Also, so that's why he wears the suit. It makes so much sense now. But I still want to know what happened! One of my favorite parts of this scene is Admiral Piett standing there and being an extension of the audience, trying to sneak a peek in to see what Vader looks like sans-helmet. So, even the Imperial Officers don't know what's under the mask!
37. Han and Leia reunite (Force Awakens) - You can see it in just the first minute or so of the linked clip. It becomes apparent that for whatever reason Han and Leia have become estranged. So, when Leia steps off the transport and Han is waiting there, you don't know if it's going to be a pleasant or contentious reunion. Leia's first comment coming in regards to Han's jacket?! Didn't see that coming! The fact that they're standing there not sure what to make of the situation and then Chewie's just like "oh screw it, I'm gonna go hug her!" Then, Han has to go ruin it with serious talk about their son. Anyway.... ALL THE NOSTALGIA!
36. Han and Leia's hug (Force Awakens) - It's, perhaps, a bit of unneeded backstory as to why Han and Leia split, but at the same time, I love backstory, so I'm okay with it. But the hug especially is what does it. It's a throwback to Leia grieving after learning that her newly-discovered-brother Luke is heading to face her previously-unknown-father Vader and tells Han "hold me." This is pretty much the same hug, but for different reasons (duh). But here's why it's so great. It's the last time that Leia and Han see, talk to, or touch each other before he dies. Shut up! I'm not crying, you're crying.
35. "It's a trap" (Return of the Jedi) - Why I like this moment is because of it's hilarity, for me, at least. Admiral Ackbar talks funny. There, I said it. I'm sure it has something to do with being an aquatic based race that can breathe underwater and probably is supposed to be underwater, and when he's not underwater his speech and breathing is different. "The Clone Wars" series kind of proves that to be true. But, it's the practical effects. It's 1983, CGI is still in development (as it kind of is permanently), so everything was done as practical as possible. Which means that someone had to dress up in an Admiral Ackbar costume and then try to make it move, talk, and blink. I can only imagine what the inside of that costume looked like. So, I can only imagine that in trying to talk in that thing, your voice would sound like you have a mouth full of gumballs. Thus we have "Ish a traaapp." When you think about it though, was this line really even necessary? It's calling the trap to the attention of the other rebel pilots, who all have eyes and are all in the same place realizing that, wait, this looks a lot like a trap. It'd be like all of your friends walking outside to see that it's raining and someone saying "it's raining." Someone's going to do it, and someone will make a smartass comment back at them, but it doesn't really need to be said. That's probably where "it's a trap" falls as well, but you can't not love it anyway.
34. Han's heroic return (A New Hope) - As a kid, I couldn't figure out why Han was such a jerk and leaving the Rebellion just as they were getting ready to attack the Death Star (keep in mind I was 8, Jabba hadn't make it into "A New Hope," and I wasn't quite sure what a "bounty" was). So, part of me knew that he was coming back, but yet, still thinking he might not. Now that I'm older, it's maybe more surprising that he came back because it's not really in his character. Han looks out for one person, himself (and maybe Chewie). The only reason he helped Luke and Obi-Wan rescue Leia was because of the money. So, it would make total sense that he skipped
33. Obi-Wan's force ghost (Empire Strikes Back) - Again, eight years old watching these movies, Obi-Wan dies the previous movie but his voice has been heard a few times since. Luke's on his death... snowbank? and hears Ben's voice. Then, whoa! Great Obi-Wan's ghost it's... Obi-Wan's ghost. How'd he do that? He's dead! Is that Luke's imagination? No, can't be (especially since his ghost comes back later). The Force is a crazy, crazy thing.
32. Emperor's Arrival (Return of the Jedi) - At the risk of losing credibility, in hindsight this is probably too high on the list. But it's still a great scene. I love the mirroring of Vader's arrival earlier with a handful of troops greeting him as opposed to, nearly, emptying the Death Star to greet the Emperor. And you thought Vader was important. At the time, Palpatine was relatively unknown. He had been alluded to by other characters throughout the first two movies and had been seen as a floating head in a hologram for a few minutes. But to see him in the flesh is something new. He's shorter than I expected, but he commands respect and fear from everyone. Even Vader, the galaxy's ultimate terror, kneels in reverence to him, and Vader just accepts everything Palpatine says without contest. Dude's got power. What would have happened though, if none of the troops showed up to greet him? Would he have blown up the Death Star himself?
31. Vader kills Palpatine (Return of the Jedi) - It's lower on this list than it would have been in, picking a random year out of thin air, 2010. It's the climax of the (at the time) last Star Wars movie, how can it not be great. Here you have Vader battling with his son only to be then battling with himself as to if he actually is a bad guy or not. He's standing alongside his master as said master electrocutes his son and then out of nowhere decides to pick up the Emperor and heave him over the railing down a chasm miles long. Wait, he did what? The bad guy's really a good guy?! That's crazy. As an eight-year-old I was blown away. I did not see that coming. I'm curious to know what people thought in theaters as they watched it as adults, or even what adults seeing it for the first time today. Apologies for the chosen link, but as stated at the start, like it or not, the 2011 Blu Ray editions are the current definitive version of the movies.... for now.
30. Yoda rescues Luke's X-Wing from the swamp (Empire Strikes Back) - Let's be honest, up to this point Yoda has been more or less comic relief. He hasn't done much other than beat R2 with his stick, and play mind games with Luke until the disembodied voice of Obi-Wan intervenes. Sure, we know he's a wise old Jedi, but he hasn't done anything. Luke crash landed his X-Wing in the swamp, and it starts sinking even deeper as he's trying to train. Luke tries to use the Force to save it and fails miserably because he's, well, not good at the Force (yet). But then Yoda gives him a whole big long lesson about the Force (giving men everywhere the nerdiest lines to say to their girlfriends) and then, as Luke walks away, Yoda says "screw it, Ima teach this boy a lesson," and then just goes about getting the drowned X-Wing out of the swamp like it's nobody's business. Then, when Luke's all like "whoa," Yoda's like "yea, that's why you fail, loser!" (Or something like that). But man, the feeling you have the first time you see a little green Muppet do what a grown man couldn't... Classic.
29. Yoda's introduction and reveal (Empire Strikes Back) - I end up going back and forth as to my favorite character. Either way, I've settled on Yoda and Darth Vader. One's the ultimate baddy, the other's the ultimate awesome-everything-else. When Yoda first appeared on screen I had no idea what he was (or that he was Yoda, which is the point). He's just this ugly looking puppet sitting on a log, talking backwards, and not being of any help. But hey, he promises Luke he'll take him to Yoda, so he might be of some help. Then, after beating R2 with his stick over a lamp and trashing Luke's camp he finally takes Luke to his house. Really, it's a test of Luke's patience, plus maybe he's gone a little crazy after being alone for 19 years, but we don't know that. Then Obi-Wan interrupts and Luke's all like "you're Yoda," and Yoda's like "betcha didn't see that coming!" It's a classic scene of misdirection for one of the best characters ever. Also, the inspiration for this. You're welcome.
28. Galactic Opera (Revenge of the Sith) - Yes, "Palpatine is Darth Sidious" is the worst kept secret in the saga. But still, it's cool to see Ian McDiarmid so skillfully play both sides. This is the first, really, where it becomes evident that Palpatine is a Sith Lord, or at the very least knows a lot about them. He gives Anakin a whole history of Darth Plagueis, who turns out to be his former master. His former master figured out how to manipulate the midichlorians to create life, and he also taught his apprentice (Sidious) everything he knew. Reading between the lines tells me that either Plagueis or Palpatine is, in a way, Anakin's father. Whoa. But, in this scene, it's like he knows exactly what's on Anakin's mind (which, I mean, he does), and this is pretty much the moment Anakin becomes Darth Vader, even though he didn't know it yet. Again, being the sucker for backstory that I am, I like this scene for it's insight into the history of the Sith. But, I also like this scene because I just want to watch the opera that's unfolding in the theater. It's just bubbles floating around with a low groan of sound accompanying it, and yet, the people are clapping. Am I missing something? Show me more!
27. Rebel ceremony (A New Hope) - The Death Star is gone! The Empire has been wounded! We're apparently going to use this single event as the official marker for our calendar and start numbering years from this point on! Why? Because reasons! But seriously, it's the first Death Star, not the second, which was bigger AND HAD THE EMPEROR ON IT! Why would they start numbering years from the Battle of Yavin? I mean from a real world perspective, numbering Star Wars years from this point is the same as numbering the years from the first movie. But if I'm the characters in the Star Wars galaxy, I'd rather number the years from maybe the formation of the Republic, or the end of the Empire, I dunno, something more widely monumental. ANYWAY..... the Death Star is gone, etc etc etc, and the rebels are celebrating by giving those directly responsible medals. Luke, Han, and Chewie walk down the stairs and down an aisle flanked on either side by rebel soldiers all standing with rebels of similar positions (rather than with their friends. Damn you formalities). And, after reaching the front of the room, get medals from Princess Leia while C-3PO and a refurbished R2-D2 watch on. Thank God R2 was fixed, I was so happy when that happened. Then, the pair of heroes (another argument to save for later) get medals and Chewie yells at everyone to start clapping (the wookiee version of a late night applause button), and then John Williams score crescendos aaaaaand.... credits. Goosebumps. What a great scene. You know it had to be a big deal when Luke puts on a gold jacket, that every kid grew up wanting, but yet when would you ever wear it. I mean hell, even Han buttoned up the top button his shirt! Now you know it's serious.
26. Anakin's march on the Jedi Temple (Revenge of the Sith) - Ok, here's another scene that I like not for it's subject matter but for the execution (pun intended?) of the scene itself. Until he puts on the armor at the end of the movie, I'm still calling him Anakin. But, Anakin, now technically Darth Vader, is spearheading the purge of the Jedi Temple on the execution of Order 66. Just the scene of him walking with thousands of Clone Troopers up the stairs is enough to give you goosebumps. Despite its over abundance of CGI, it's still a beautiful series of shots that are all quite awe inspiring and ominous. One problem though.... I want to see the actual goings on in the Temple and not just in fast forward on a security hologram. I guess I'll have to wait for Lucas to buy back the rights to Star Wars and release the super edit of the prequels in 2042.
25. Yoda's Heartbreak over Order 66 (Revenge of the Sith) - I totally feel for Yoda here. He's clearly the wisest if not the strongest of the Jedi, so it should come as no surprise that he can feel his colleagues being murdered across the galaxy. But the fact that it's such a raw, deep pain that he seemingly physically feels heartbroken, it's almost enough to make you want to cry over it. I said almost. And we'll get back to that later as well. But, I like this moment so much that I included it in one of my interviews with a college basketball player, when I asked him if he was excited for The Force Awakens and he replied saying he had never seen Star Wars, cut to Yoda having a heart attack. I thought it was funny...
24. Yoda and Obi-Wan fight outside Jedi Temple (Revenge of the Sith) - Any scene that has Yoda using his lightsaber has to be a good one, right? Yoda and Obi-Wan return to the Jedi Temple after the entire order has been all but executed, in an attempt to change the coded retreat message. To do so though, they have to get through the garrison of troopers at the Temple. Easy work for two of the most skilled Jedi in the galaxy. I mean, Yoda throws his lightsaber through a trooper's chest, then jumps on his shoulders to get it back before taking down two more troopers. The only thing he didn't do in this scene is use his lightsaber as a boomerang, which, I'm sure he could if he ever wanted to.
23. Rey finds Luke's lightsaber (Force Awakens) - I'm no literary or cinematic expert, but I'm guessing this is the scene that makes the Skywalker lightsaber a McGuffin. Anyway, it's a cool scene for nostalgia sake and also for confusing the hell out of everyone. Because one, HOW DID MAZ KANATA FIND THAT LIGHTSABER?! And two, as soon as Rey touches the lightsaber she starts having all sorts of flashbacks to, presumably, Luke's new Jedi Academy suggesting that she was training with him before Ben Solo became Kylo Ren and ruined everything. I've watched this scene on slow-mo a few times and it doesn't really tell me anything new, but I'm guessing all of the questions we have will be answered in the next two movies. My guess, is that Rey is either Luke's daughter or, better yet, the daughter of Luke and Obi-Wan's previously unknown daughter. Imagine the Strength of the Force in that kid!? It's pretty cool though, that a lightsaber that was around in the previous movies, several generations earlier, comes back in the latest installment to tie things together. It's obviously an object of some importance.
22. Vader unmasked (Return of the Jedi) - The moment six years and three movies in the making. We have been waiting for this moment for so long! What does Darth Vader look like under the mask? On his death-shuttle ramp, Vader-turned-Anakin asks Luke to take his mask off so he can see him with his own eyes. It's an overly dramatic reveal, but it's worth it. He's all pasty and scared and deformed. I'm not sure how or why Luke doesn't cringe or at the very least ask what happened to him. But hey, why ruin the moment? When you think of Darth Vader, you immediately think of the mask and the breathing. He's so dark, so ominous, so mysterious. Then, just as he's about to die, the mask comes off. It's a full-circle Anakin becomes Vader become Anakin moment and, in a way, a thank you to the fans for sticking with the series for six years.
21. Han Solo's death (Force Awakens) - There's a lot wrong with this scene as well, but, it's a great way for a great hero to go out. Han Solo confronting his estranged son and dying as a result. I can't imagine how hard it must have been for him to walk out onto that bridge and confront
20. Yoda's Death (Return of the Jedi) - How do you kill the galaxy's oldest and most legendary Jedi? You can't have him die in a battle for multiple reasons, a) he's 900 years old, what battles is he fighting and b) who's strong enough to kill him? No, he has to die peacefully and quietly in the comfort of his home. After 900 years it seems like there's no end to Yoda, but anyway, after being in perfect health one movie earlier (about three years) all of a sudden he's sick and dying rather inexplicably, but I guess he's not in his 800s anymore, so it probably makes sense. I was bummed when I first saw it, but still so surprised and and a loss for words when he used his dying words were to tell Luke that "there is another Skywalker." So that's the "another" he mentioned to Obi-Wan in the previous movie! I wonder who it is. Too bad Yoda died before he could tell us. Good thing Obi-Wan learned to become immortal! Also, where'd his body go? I know that Obi-Wan's body disappeared, but he died in battle and he disappeared, but I always just thought that was a product of self-sacrifice. I guess I never really made the connection between both of their bodies disappearing and both of them becoming immortal with the Force. But, this also begs the question, why didn't Anakin/Vader's body disappear since he (somehow) became immortal? Or, did it and Luke just burned the armor. I have a headache now...
19. Vader's revolving door of officers (Empire Strikes Back) - Admiral Ozzel, dead. Captain Piett, promoted. Captain Needa, forgiven, but dead. I probably could or should include this in the funniest moments section later, but it's too good for that. After several officers disappoint him, Vader just force chokes them and kills them. The best is when he kills Ozzel and addresses Captain Piett and as Ozzel's body hits the floor readdresses Piett as Admiral. Lolz. Then, Captain Needa loses the Millennium Falcon on the back of his own ship and tries to apologize to Vader, like he thought that was gonna work. Sucker. In the opening scene of "Return of the Jedi," this scene takes on a whole new meaning and a whole new level of funny when Vader tells Commander Jerjerrod (no really, I had to look it up too) that he better work faster on the second Death Star because "the Emperor is not as forgiving as I am." Dude, you just killed off a whole slew of officers for disappointing you, how much worse can the Emperor be?! But humor aside, this is a great scene because it gives you a great perspective of just how ruthless Vader is, and how determined he is to find the rebel scum that blew up his Death Star. I certainly wouldn't want to be on Vader's bad side.
18. Vader enters the Tantive IV (A New Hope) - What is Star Wars without Darth Vader? I mean, honestly... So, naturally, when your greatest villain, and possibly film's greatest villain makes his initial entrance, it's bound to be awesome. Retroactively there are a few issues, which I'll come back to, but we still just went through this dramatic space battle and an epic firefight with blasters in the hallways of the ship and then out of the smoke comes this huge figure cloaked all in black, and breathing this deep eerie breath. He doesn't even say a word, but he doesn't have to. He's terrifying.
17. "I love you." "I know." (Empire Strikes Back) - I still don't know if this singular moment makes Han amazing or an asshole, or a bit of both. I mean, what kind of smartass says that to the woman they love?! But it's so awesome. There's an obvious amount of sexual tension between the two of them, more so in "Empire" than in "A New Hope," but this is the first time they really express any type of amorous feelings. But, what makes this scene even better is in the next movie when cornered by Stormtroopers, Leia pulls out a hidden blaster and gets to send this, for lack of a better word, jab right back at Han. Life goals - when a girl tells me she loves me and I can respond with "I know," and not get slapped across the face.
16. Han's smugness (Return of the Jedi) -
15. Kylo Ren freezes Poe's blaster blast (Force Awakens) - Random though, if guns shoot bullets, what do blasters shoot? It's got to be blasts, right? But a blaster blast sounds redundant. Anyway. Poe tries to come to the rescue Lars Son Tekka and the Jakku villagers by shooting at Kylo Ren. But, wait a minute, Ren just reaches out and freezes the blast in mid air. Jaw-dropped. He did what?! How?! Damn, this guy's gonna be something else. Then, when the whole scene is over, he just let's it go and it hits the vaporator. So, he's powerful enough to hold that blast in place and do everything else he did in that scene?! Wow.
14. "Chewie, we're home" (Force Awakens) - All the nostalgia, again! Han Solo without the Millennium Falcon is like a hot dog without mustard, it's still doable but it's just not right. Here you have Finn and Rey, who we're still getting used to, caught in the tractor beam of a bigger ship and hiding from who they think is the First Order and then Han and Chewie walk up the ramp and it's a fanboy nerdsplosion. Then, Han opens his mouth and you can't help but smile at what he says. Also, assuming the girl that didn't slap me when I told her "I know" after she says she loves me, I will definitely use this line every time we come home from vacation, and just hope that she doesn't take offense to being called Chewie. She's a lucky gal, isn't she?! Whoever you are, I apologize in advance.
13. Palpatine's master plan (Episodes I-III) - Sheev Palpatine (yes, that's his first name, apparently) is truly an evil mastermind. You get a good idea of just how much by watching the movies, obviously, but you get a much deeper look into just how many strings he pulled if you watch "The Clone Wars" TV series. He corrupts Count Dooku who helps corrupt an already skeptical Sifo-Dyas, who orders the creation of the clone army on Kamino. Palpatine was responsible for the creation of the clone army, possibly the cause of Anakin's conception, was responsible for the blockade on Naboo that forced Queen Amidala to initiate the ouster of Chancellor Valorum thus all but guaranteeing he get the job, manufactured the secession of the Separatists, played both sides of the war as his two personae making sure that all roads led to the Senate voting him more and more power, and using that power to stay in office long enough to eventually organize the end of the war, the end of the Jedi, and the start of the Empire with him as Emperor. In "The Clone Wars," you see more of Darth Sidious talking to Dooku regarding the whole plan, without also telling Dooku that he's not in the picture beyond the end of the war. Very few times did anything ever unfold in a manner other than the way he planned it. It's a historical trend that despite "The Rule of Two," mandating there be just two Sith Lords at a time, a master and apprentice, Siths often break this rule anyway. I can't help but think, according to the timeline, that Darth Maul and Count Dooku were both apprenticed to Sidious at the same time. I have nothing to back this up, but I can't see how it wouldn't be possible or likely. To sum up Palpatine, let me offer you this line from his Wikipedia entry, "Palpatine has become a widely recognized popular culture symbol of evil, sinister deception, dictatorship, tyranny, and the subversion of democracy."
12. "Hope" (Rogue One) - This is the closest video I could find to just showing the closing lines of "Rogue One," but it's a pretty awesome edit nonetheless. Anyway, I'm scoring this so high because of the obvious nostalgia of seeing, not only Leia, but a young Leia again. I know it's CGI technology, but it's a rather impressive use of it. The other reason it's so high on my list is because it's, more or less, the last time Carrie Fisher was in a Star Wars movie while she was still alive, even if it's not really her. Not to make light of her passing, but I was relieved when I heard that she had completed filming her scenes for "The Last Jedi," but I'm bummed about her not being in Episode IX when that comes around, and curious to see how it would have been different if she hadn't left us. The only thing I would change about this scene is, instead of saying "hope," she should have said "A New Hope," but maybe that's too cheesy even for Star Wars.
11. Star Destroyer Attack (A New Hope) - Huh, it's like I planned it that this should follow the last scene of the movie that takes place directly before it. But seriously, how cool is the opening scene of the first movie?! You get the opening crawl, you get the music, you get a fairly big ship coming across the screen firing lasers at.... whoa.... an even bigger, never-ending ship. It's such an impressive shot, not knowing how big the Star Destroyer is, that "Spaceballs" had to exaggerate it to make it even funnier, which admittedly is also a spoof of "2001: A Space Odyssey." I still remember seeing this for the first time and my dad telling me how impressive it was to watch in the theaters, saying something like "we were already wowed by the opening crawl and the music and then you have this ship that just never ends and it was just mind blowing how amazing it was, we knew we were in for a treat."
(HEY! We reached the Top Ten! How excited are you?! How awake are you?!)
10. Han running and retreating (A New Hope) - This scene is just fantastic. Han's reckless. We know this. We're also still trying to decide if he's lucky or good. But here they all are trying to escape the Death Star and they turn a corner and are face-to-face with a handful of Stormtroopers. Han, being the bold type, chargers right at them running, in the most unconventional, and fun to imitate, way possible down the hall way chasing them. Then, he rounds a corner, finds dozens or hundreds more troopers (depending on which version you're watching) and realizes "maybe this was a dumb idea," and then adopts the Monty Python approach. It's just fun to watch and always worth a chuckle. Also, probably inspiration for that scene in "Solo" when Han meets Chewie.
9. Rey meets Luke (Force Awakens) - With "The Last Jedi" coming out shortly and the inevitable conclusion of this scene, this could rise or fall on this list depending on the outcome of that conversation. As it is, the power of silence is, more or less, what makes this scene. You knew that Mark Hamill was in "Force Awakens" because his name was all over the posters and because you can't have Han and Leia without Luke. But we sit through over two hours of a movie and Luke only gets a few passing mentions. Maybe he's in the after credits? Maybe he's not in it at all! FALSE! He's in the last scene! AND just when you think he's going to say something, zoom out and cut to credits. WHAT THE HELL! OH THE SUSPENSE! This scene is also great because it further ties the new trilogy and the originals together. The originals had two heroes and a heroin, as did the prequels, and here we have the same, but different. Rey, Finn, and Poe (although Poe's role was minimal in VII, unfortunately) are the new Luke, Han, and Leia. In this case, Rey is the Luke, Finn the Han (because of their initial outsider status), and Poe the Leia (because of their connection to the Rebellion/Resistance). So, here you have the two force sensitive main characters of their respective trilogies meeting for the first time, and, using the lightsaber that they both clearly have a connection with to bring them together. It's pretty cool. The only thing harder than living up to the expectations of Luke's first words come Christmas time, after two years of building suspense, is if they took the George Lucas approach and waited three years between movies.
8. Darth Vader slaughters rebels (Rogue One) - When I was watching "Rogue One" in theaters last year I was amazed. I really enjoyed the movie. It was a great look into the backstory of how the Rebels got the Death Star plans to set the original trilogy in motion. When the Rebels are trying to make their escape with the plans and, down the dark hallway you hear Darth Vader's signature breathing followed closely by the ignition of his lightsaber illuminating him in the fog, my jaw dropped, my eyes widened, and then my face turned into a grin. This is going to be AWESOME! And yea, it was. He just went to town on those rebels. They didn't stand a chance! That's the Darth Vader we've been wanting to see! Ruthless. Powerful. Oh man. What a scene. Also, it ends with him standing in the launch bay of the Rebel Frigate watching the Tantive IV take off. This is cool because the original reason for Darth Vader's armor was that he would need a suit allowing him to breathe in space if he was going to travel from one ship to another. This is really the only time that he's shown standing exposed to space. How he doesn't get sucked out into the abyss? Eh, details...
7. Jango's seismic charges (Attack of the Clones) - Like Boga, this is among my favorites mostly for the sound. The scene itself is okay, at best, but the seismic charges are amazing. Firstly, visually they're fun to watch explode, the implosion then explosion, secondly, the sound. I don't know why I like it so much. It sounds like the guitarist in a band warming up during the sound check, or better yet, like this. The worst part of this scene is that Jango doesn't release more seismic charges. Who cares if Obi-Wan dodges them, they're too cool not to launch.
6. Mace Windu: "This party's over" (Attack of the Clones) - Samuel L. Jackson is one of the baddest actors out there (not worst actors, but you know what I mean). His role in the Star Wars universe until this point was, well, boring. In "Phantom Menace" he just sat there on the Jedi Council and talked. That's pretty much it. Then in "Attack of the Clones" guess what? Same thing. Great. What a waste of talent. Wait, what's this, a battle? What's this? Mace Windu surprising the bad guys? What's this? A purple lightsaber? SWEET! Now, to clarify, I knew when Episode I came out that Mace Windu had a purple lightsaber. The action figure had a purple lightsaber, the coloring books and whatnot had him with a purple lightsaber (I was 11, it was fun to be a kid). But, you never saw it in the movie. So, to see a lightsaber not blue, green, or red was pretty cool. And the way that he brought it out was as badass as SLJ can do in a movie written by George Lucas. (I'm sorry, maybe that's too mean).
5. "I am your father!" (Empire Strikes Back) - I know, I know, "how can there be four things about Star Wars better than this?!" Bare with me.... This scene is fantastic. It's perhaps one of the best, most iconic scenes in the history of cinema. "I am your father" is right up there with "Toto, I have a feeling we're not in Kansas anymore," "I'm going to make him an offer he can't refuse," and "frankly my dear, I don't give a damn." As I mentioned earlier, this scene alone is the reason why anyone who watches the movies for the first time should start with the original trilogy, then to the prequels, then to the latest Disney installments. This is the biggest surprise in the saga, if not all of film. First time viewers, if adults, may see this coming because of what they know from pop culture, but kids won't have any idea about it. This secret is so much more valuable than the "surprise" that Anakin turns to the Dark Side in the prequels. Besides, if you know Anakin is Darth Vader, then the whole "I am your Father" thing isn't even a surprise. It's a "umm.... yea, no shit," moment and those are no fun. Eight years old, viewing this for the first time, I think I had some kind of knowledge that there was some kind of something dealing with Darth Vader and Luke, but I was still amazed when he said it out loud. How can you not be? The villain of the series being the father or the main hero? That's insane! I think it's really cool, too, how closely guarded the secret was that among the cast only Mark Hamill knew at the time of filming so he could react appropriately, and then James Earl Jones when he had to record his lines.
4. Obi-Wan versus Anakin (Revenge of the Sith) - Spoiler alert, my top four are all from the prequels. Feel free to start hating me now. I'm sorry. But, you have to take into consideration that they came out when I was 11, 14, and 17 years old (or about to turn). That's a big time for movies and scenes to make impacts on a person. I know they're far from perfect, but there are very awesome moments in them. This is definitely one of the best. This is the lightsaber fight we've been waiting 30+ years for, not just for its significance, but for how epic it is. It's a far cry from the first time we saw these two fight, 19 years in their future. That was an old man and a mostly-robot slowly waving sticks around like two kids with umbrellas. This puts Olympic fencing to shame. Master vs. Apprentice, they know each other so well it's tough for either one to get the upper hand. They know all the same moves, all the same tricks. One of my favorite parts is when they lock lightsabers and each try to Force Push the other away, but doing so at the same time you can almost see the Force energy building up between them and reaching a breaking point to launch them apart. The dialogue leading up to the fight is... umm... kinda awful... but I'll admit I had it all memorized (the cut scenes in the "Episode III" video game were impossible to skip). The dialogue in the fight itself is a little better. The dialogue at the end, while clunky, is pretty awesome. You can feel the pain in Obi-Wan's voice after he cut off Anakin's three remaining limbs. He's heartbroken, and why wouldn't he be? His best friend and brother is gone and tried to kill him. I'd be pretty devastated. In hindsight, it makes the set up to "A New Hope" and the story that Obi-Wan tells Luke about his father more interesting, because you know the
3. Darth Vader's first breath (Revenge of the Sith) - As I said before, there are few things more terrifying than Darth Vader's armor. Here you have a whole trilogy that might as well be called "why Anakin wears a mask." It's like watching Smallville for ten years waiting for Superman to fly. 1999 to 2005 of sitting through some weak writing, some weak acting, some decent acting, some cool CGI (that now looks pretty dated), and finally we get to see the famous Vader armor. Watching the droids "assemble" Vader is, honestly, whatever, until the mask comes down onto Anakin's head. The shot of his eyes opening wide is kind of weird, but oh well, it's the eyes of the mask opening up and turning to the red "night vision" and then the helmet lowering down into silence until..... the first breath. I'll put money on it that you're lying if you said you didn't geek out, or get chills, or both the first time you heard that breath in this scene. How could you not? One thing that's also cool about this whole scene is, as the special features pointed out, Hayden Christensen got to wear the suit for real. Now, like him or not, it would be pretty cruel of the production team to put him through all two movies across several years and not let him wear the suit that makes his character famous, which was his argument and the reason they eventually let him. It's almost as cruel as ignoring David Prowse's involvement in the saga.
2. Darth Maul appears on Naboo (Revenge of the Sith) - The awesomeness of this scene can be credited as much to John Williams score as the moment itself. "Ho hum, we're all going to walk from the hangar up to the throne room. Here let's open these doors, what is this black hooded figure?!" Oh man. YES! Darth Maul getting the scene he deserves. How cool is this really though. He doesn't even say a word. He doesn't have to. He just stands there, looks up, sees Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan, lowers the hood, takes off the robe, pulls out the lightsaber, lights one side, waits for the dramatic reveal, and boom, lights the other side. A TWO SIDED LIGHTSABER!!!! How cool is that! I mean, you know he could easily have lit both sides at the same time, but what fun would that have been. He would have done that in Episode II if he had made it that far (more on that later), but no... the first time he lights both sides has to be as dramatic as possible, and it was amazing. The whole fight scene was cool too, I guess...
1. Yoda pulls out his lightsaber (Attack of the Clones) -
Yoda is my favorite character in the saga. I often switch back-and-forth between him and Vader, but it's kind of like having a favorite National League team and a favorite American League team. You can like one more than the other, but that doesn't mean you can't still root for both. If the Mets and Indians play each other I'm rooting for the Mets. If Yoda and Vader ever fought, I'd be rooting for Yoda, but not overly upset if Vader wins. I'd be kind of upset if the Indians won though, especially if it was the World Series. Anyway... Yoda comes to the rescue of Anakin and Obi-Wan and has a Force measuring contest with Count Dooku until Dooku's all like, this is pointless, we have to decide this with lightsabers. At first when I saw this I was like "well, I know Yoda's action figure for this movie comes with a lightsaber, but Yoda doesn't actually have one, so how is this going to go?" Then, the camera cuts to Yoda, he pulls back his cloak, force grabs his lightsaber off his belt, and lights it. I got goosebumps the first time I saw it, not as much every time since. But you know the feeling I'm talking about, in movies or music, it's called piloerection or pilomotor reflex. I also get this feeling the moment Mike Eruzione becomes the captain of the US Olympic Team in "Miracle," or when Simba becomes king. Anyway, Yoda has a lightsaber. Wrap your head around that. I mean, he's a Jedi so he kind of has to, but he's also like the Gandhi of Jedi, so it would makes sense that he didn't. Besides, the dude's pushing 900 years old and walks with a cane, if he had a lightsaber at one time, it has to be long since retired, no? No. Also, it's such a tiny little lightsaber! But it's not the size that matters, it's how you use it. Right? Only Yoda, though, can be badass enough to force grab the lightsaber off his own belt. Manually grabbing it off your belt is too easy and not impressive enough, so why not show off and do it the more fun way. Not only that, but he totally goes berserk on Count Dooku. He's almost 900 years old and he's doing parkour with a lightsaber all over the hangar! He totally would have won the fight too except for that pansy Dooku cheating to find an escape route. I don't want a rematch! I demand it!
Phew. We made it. We're through my favorite moments. I hope you're still with me. I'm not sure I am. But, I'm still enjoying this, although my computer might not be (but that's my burden).
The Star Wars movies are among my favorites, if not at the top of that list. But even your favorite movies can have some pretty terrible scenes. So, let's hop back into it.
The Dark Side - The Worst Moments in the Star Wars Saga
I've tried really hard so far to not comment on the quality of the production value of any of the movies, and I will continue to do so. However, some moments in the saga have t make the worst list because of the writing, costuming, or some other production decision. Also, some moments are on this list because of George Lucas's refusal to leave the movies alone. Luckily, he can no longer alter things. Unfortunately, Disney doesn't seem overly eager to go back and re-correct the things he changed. Here's hoping...
Luckily for you though, there are fewer worst moments than best moments. So ready or not, here we go.
52. No 20th Century Fox logos (Force Awakens) - "The Force Awakens" was the first movie made under Disney rather than by 20th Century Fox, so of course it wouldn't have the famous 20th Century Fox logo sequence. Thankfully it also didn't have the Disney Cinderella castle logo, because that would've just been weird. But still, it was really weird to see a Star Wars movie without that 20th Century Fox fanfare. The two go together so famously that the 20th Century Fox Fanfare is included on the albums for the original trilogy. From my first viewing of the movies, the start of a Star Wars movie requires the THX logo, then the 20th Century Fox fanfare, before the famous "A long time ago..." It's not essential to the story, and not overly important, but this is my blog and I wanted to call attention to the fact that while I wasn't the least bit surprised, I was a little bummed that Disney's first movie didn't have another studios logos at the start (and yes, I know how stupid that sounds).
51. Lando's wearing Han's clothes (Empire Strikes Back) - I don't know what's more upsetting, that Lando just went and raided Han's closet after he was frozen in carbonite or that I didn't notice this for years until Family guy called attention to it. I mean, it's bad enough that Lando betrayed his friend and let Han get frozen in carbonite and sent off with Boba Fett to Jabba the Hut, now he's going through his clothes? Not cool dude. Although, Billy Dee Williams and a panel moderator helped explain this. Personally I like the last answer, and that Lando had to leave Cloud City so quickly he didn't have time to pack any clothes, his were dirty, so he changed into Han's. I can go with that. As long as he cleans them before he puts them back in the drawer. Jerk.
50. Princess Leia and the case of the disappearing accent (A New Hope) - It sounds like it should be a Sherlock Holmes story, no? When talking to Darth Vader in the hallways of the Tantive IV Leia has her normal American accent. Later, when brought before Tarkin on the Death Star all of a sudden she's British. Then, when Han and Luke rescue her she's American again and stays America through the rest of the series. Now, from a practical standpoint, Carrie Fisher was 19 when filming the first Star Wars and going up against the likes of the esteemed Peter Cushing, filming this scene on her first day on set. George Lucas told her she had to take the scene seriously because the fate of her planet was at stake. Looking at the dialogue, Fisher said there was no way she could read those lines and sound serious with an American accent. Yet, at the same time, after speaking with a British accent in this scene, why not stick with it the whole movie? Especially when she has to film scenes that come before this scene which she speaks with an American accent, and then again after. Or, why not, after she has a little more experience, go back and film that scene again, at least the dialogue and have her do it without a British accent? It just doesn't make any sense. I mean, I guess from a character standpoint, she's trying to be proper and posh in front of high ranking government officials? Maybe since the Dawn of the Empire, the Imperial Senate proceedings require all senators to speak with British accents and wear black robes and white powder wigs. I hope that's the case because I would love to see the Kashyyyk delegation speak Wookiee in a British accent.
49. Vader's Arrival (A New Hope) - I know that this scene is listed in my best moments, but it also deserves a spot on this list. Why? "Rogue One," that's why. "Rogue One" and "A New Hope" run right into each other no more than a few hours apart. So, the first Darth Vader appearance in the original saga was awe-inspiring and epic. His final appearance in "Rogue One" was the ultimate in badassery. Yet, now, if you watch them concurrently, his entrance in "A New Hope" is awful. Seriously, watch this video. Darth Vader goes from slaughtering a dozen or more rebels to tracking down the ship that escaped and then letting all of his lackeys do the dirty work when they catch said ship. They don't even have the decency to clean up the bodies when he shows up! (Sorry for the German. Blame YouTube).
48. Geo-Locations (Rogue One) - So, is this really worth getting upset about? No. But why, in seven prior movies are we able to discern which planet the movie by exposition, dialogue, etc, but all of a sudden because this isn't a numbered episode means that we need an on-screen prompt telling us which planet we're on? Why?! It's not nearly as distracting as the movie goes on as it was the first time, but still... the first time made me want to die a little on the inside.47. "Vader, release him" (A New Hope) - It's not that it's not a cool scene, because it is. But here's the thing, why does Tarkin have any control over Darth Vader? Sure, Tarkin was put in charge of the Death Star, but Vader is a Sith Lord. In my mind, the hierarchy in the galaxy goes Emperor Palpatine, Darth Vader, and everyone else. Some might argue that Mas Amedda ranked higher than Vader, and maybe that's the case, but seeing as how he disappears at the end of Palpatine's battle with Yoda and is never mentioned in the movies again, I'm throwing the challenge flag on that one. Yet, Tarkin must have some sort of control over Vader, hell, even Leia knows it. She straight up tells Tarkin "I should have expected to find you holding Vader's leash." Yea, because Vader needs a leash! PSH! You know who needs a leash? That whiny brat Anakin. Wait...
46. Upside Down Death Star (Rogue One) - We all have OCD-like tendencies sometimes and this scene really upset mine. The image of the Death Star is seared into every Star Wars fans' brains. So, when Rogue One comes along and is the story all about the Death Star, they then go and pull this crap. THE DEATH STAR IS UPSIDE DOWN!!! It's about to fire on Jedha and the main laser is on the bottom half of the station. Sure, maybe it's perspective, but then that means the camera is upside down. That makes no sense whatsoever, as to why that would be the case. Which brings me back to the point that THE DEATH STAR IS UPSIDE DOWN!!! Remember when I talked about the physics of the Star Wars universe and how gravity works? Case. In. Point. At least in "Passengers," or "2001: A Space Odyssey" the ships had a spinning curve to them that simulated gravity, no "Star Wars" ship does. Suspension of disbelief, sure. But, don't tell me that the Death Star can just turn 180 degrees on it's vertical access and everyone can still stand upright on each of its floors. I'm not buying it.
45. Captain Phasma gives up (Force Awakens) - I seriously hope Captain Phasma does something in the next two movies. Otherwise, what a freaking waste of a character. I mean, look at all the promotional material for the movie and how heavily featured she was. Everyone wanted to know about the "Chrome Trooper." And then the movie comes out and, whoops, she's useless. If she's supposed to be that powerful and evil and strong, why then would she relent so easily and help Finn, Han, and Chewie lower the shields on Starkiller base? I mean, sure, it was at threat of gunpoint, but someone that came down so hard on Finn for deserting the First Order, she screwed them over even more than he did. So who's really to blame for the destruction of
44. Kylo Ren's voice (Force Awakens) - It got better as the movie went on, but every time I watch this movie, the first time I hear Kylo Ren talk, all I can think is that Christopher Nolan was like "I'm going to have the least understandable bad guy of all time," and J.J. Abrams was like "hold my beer."
43. Lando turns on Han/Leia (Empire Strikes Back) - I get it, Lando's a no good swindler like Han and guys like that always look out for number one. But still, to turn your best friend over to the Empire just to save the business operation you have going? That's shrewd. Sure, once Darth Vader called more and more audibles on the arrangement he realized he had made the wrong decision and changed his mind and started helping Leia and Chewie to try and save Han. Still, not cool bro. Also, why is it that someone so close to Han can't pronounce his friend's name? He's the only one that never pronounces it "Hahn," he even gets Leia to mispronounce it wrong a few times. It must be something about the air in Bespin. But seriously, doubly not cool bro.
42. Everyone dies (Rogue One) - Like Mace Windu's death listed in the best moments, I have a problem putting a good death in the worst section. These are all good deaths, they're powerful, they're meaningful, they're necessary. I mean, we all knew that all the deaths were coming, right? They had to die. They're not in the original trilogy. How do you explain their absence in the next three movies if they don't die at the end of "Rogue One?" About as easily as you explain why Darth Vader didn't kill all the rebels at the start of "A New Hope," I guess (salty much?). It's hard to pick which death hurt more because they were all pretty sad. So while I get it, it still sucks.
41. Chewie's Tarzan yell (Return of the Jedi) - Ha ha ha. Right? Wrong. Yea, I thought it was funny in Revenge of the Sith when the wookiees did it in "Revenge of the Sith." But seriously? To add it into "Return of the Jedi" just for the chance at an extra laugh? No, you had it right the first time. It was probably unnecessary in both movies, but definitely unnecessary in the scene where you didn't have it there in the first place. Leave your movies alone! I'm talking to you George.
40. Rebel Ceremony (A New Hope) - Three words: Where's Chewie's medal. Seriously though, Leia hands out medals to Luke and Han. That's it. No medal to Chewbacca. What. The. Hell. I mean, sure, Luke was the one that blew up the Death Star and Han was the pilot of the ship that helped save Luke so he could blow up the Death Star. But Chewbacca was the co-pilot, and essential to rescuing Princess Leia and returning her to the Rebellion. So, why doesn't he get a medal? I mean, technically speaking, R2-D2 should get a medal too, since he did whatever it is droids do on fighter ships. But, what use does a droid have for medal? I mean, he got all fixed up after getting all blown up, so I guess that's good enough. But seriously, where's Chewie's medal? I think when he roars and "tells everyone to applause" he's actually saying "WHERE THE HELL IS MY MEDAL, JERKS!"
39. Jango Fett's death (Attack of the Clones) - I don't get the fascination with Boba Fett. There I said it. Sure, his armor is pretty badass, but then again he didn't really do anything in the movies and as I said, this post is focused on what happens in the canon (but not the comic books because I haven't read them). So, sure, Boba Fett probably does a lot more cool stuff, and if he gets his own movie, it'll be awesome. Until then, I don't get it. So, Jango Fett's inclusion in the prequels is cool, but so what? He appears in "Attack of the Clones" and within an hour is dead. Great. It's not so much that he dies, but how. I mean really, he's supposed to be this awesome bounty hunter and he just stands there making little attempt to get away from Mace Windu and then his head gets chopped off. Sure, he got trampled by the reek and got pretty banged up, then took it down with one shot. But still. I will give him the benefit of the doubt that right as he's getting beheaded it looks like he's trying to start up the jetpack and fly away, but it was likely damaged when he was run over by the reek. Okay, fine. But still, if he's supposed to be such a great bad guy, find a better way to kill him. His villainy is wasted in his first movie, why not let him survive into the next one and kill him off some other way? I don't know...
38. Boba Fett's death (Return of the Jedi) - What do you know? This is next on the list! Shocker! At least Jango had that cool fight with Obi-Wan on Kamino and launched some really awesome seismic charges. What did Boba Fett do? He walked around Cloud City before finally leaving with Han Solo frozen in carbonite. Then, he flirted with members of the Max Rebo band, nodded at
37. Luke Skywalker's a myth (Force Awakens) - I like this scene for what it is, a chance for Han to reflect back on his time with his good ole buddy Luke. But it was only 30 years ago! How do Rey and Finn think that the whole Jedi and Luke thing was a myth? Thirty years ago was 1987, I was -1 years old, but still I don't think that the Iran-Contra affair was a myth. Maybe if they were debating whether or not The Old Republic existed, sure. I mean, that was at least 3,600 years or more before the movies. It's like any of us questioning if Moses really parted the Red Sea. We want to believe it, but do we have proof? We have faith. Yet, the Star Wars galaxy is bound to have more proof, given their advanced technology. So while it's cool to see Han look back on his past and that past's connection to Luke Skywalker, forgive me if I'm skeptical that Rey and Finn would think that Luke is just some urban legend. Finn it makes sense, he's a stromtrooper, the First Order wouldn't exactly go around telling their troops about the legendary heroics of Luke, Han, and Leia before training. Sure, Rey grew up an more or less an orphan so maybe she's isolated enough to not know history. Still, she would have likely heard all the stories about Han, Luke, and Leia from those passing through Jakku. At some point, you'd think she'd ask enough questions to realize that they're not fictional bedtime stories. I guess it adds to the legend and mystique of Missing Jedi Luke Skywalker. But still, I have a hard time believing it.
36. Starkillerquake ends battle (Force Awakens) - I guess it's technically wrong to call it an earthquake, since it's not Earth. But anyway, it's an unfortunate end to the fight between Rey and Kylo Ren. I mean, Rey was holding her own, but it was clear that she was probably getting by mostly on luck. Kylo Ren was clearly going to win the fight if it had gone on longer, despite him coming out more injured than her. Then all of a sudden the deus ex machina of a Starkillerquake separates the two, conveniently with Finn on the same side of the chasm as Rey so that they could escape and the movie could continue. Not that I want Rey to die, but I kind of wanted to see the natural end of that fight.
35. Obi-Wan vs Darth Vader & Obi-Wan's death (A New Hope) - At the time, this was an awesome fight. It's the first lightsaber fight you ever see. Holy cow! I want a lightsaber. But then you see Luke fight Vader in the next two movies, and then you see how lightsabers were meant to be used in the prequel trilogy and you go back and watch this duel and... yawn! If you watch the special features you hear Alex Guinness talking about how George Lucas instructed them to swing the lightsabers as if they were heavy medieval double handed swords. I mean, it makes sense. His thoughts were that they'd expel so much energy that you would need two hands to control them. Besides, you have a senior citizen dueling with a man who's half robot, it's bound to not be the most exciting. It kind of reminds me of when two kids pick up sticks in the backyard and pretend to sword fight. They're not really trying to hit each other, they're more intent on just smacking the sticks together. Then there's the matter of Obi-Wan's death. Not a fan. I know, I know, he sacrificed himself to become a more powerful mentor to Luke because he had achieved immortality through the Cosmic Force, but still, after seeing how awesome Obi-Wan was through the prequels and even "The Clone Wars," I'm not sure if it was the death he deserved. It was on his own terms, and served a greater good, which is totally in his MO, but it even at the time it seemed premature, and then in hindsight with the prequels in mind, seems like it happened too easily. Also, I want the grudge match. Force ghost Obi-Wan against Force ghost Anakin to break the 1-1 tie. Make it happen.
34. Jar Jar banished because he's clumsy (Phantom Menace) - I get it, Jar Jar's annoying. I don't hate him nearly as much as everyone else does, and for that I also don't apologize. Sure, he's clumsy, he's the comic relief of the movie and in this case that comes in the form of slapstick. But even so, I don't know if it warrants him getting banished. I don't even know how to say boom de gasser let alone what that means, nor do I know what a heyblibber is, or how you crash it, but to then ban Jar Jar with the, apparently, aptly named nocombackie law? That just seems harsh. What's the punishment for murder on Otoh Gunga? Point is, I don't think in Jar Jar's case, that the punishment fits the crime. I mean, think about it. If you crash your parents car, you're going to get grounded. This is like crashing your parents car and the mayor of your city kicking you out and forcing you to move somewhere else and never come back. Ouch.
33. Trade Federation delegates' mouth movements (Phantom Menace) - In a trilogy that is 99.9% CGI why does the mouth movements of the Neimoidians fall into the 0.01% of practical effects? It's like watching an old Japanese film dubbed with English lines. The mouth movements don't match what they're saying. The costumes are impressive, the wardrobes are exquisite, but all of that is ruined by the weird lip movements. I just don't like it.
32. Wampa attack (Empire Strikes Back) - It's a cheap jump scare in the first twenty minutes of the movie. Why? Because, why not I guess. Also, the quick camera cuts, 37 years after the fact just make the whole thing look like cheap effects. You can just picture the crew member off screen whacking Luke with a stuffed Wampa arm and knocking him off the tauntaun.
31. Sarlacc Pit edit (Return of the Jedi) - What exactly is the Sarlacc? I don't know. Well, as of 2011 at least I know what the head of it looks like. But, if I'm being honest, I like the old version better. There's a mystery to it. What's in the pit? Why are there tentacles and teeth(?) coming out of the sand? You don't know. But you don't have to. All you have to know is that if you fall in there, you're dead and will slowly be digested over the course of 1,000 years. Yikes. Then, this scene got Lucased to the max and now you have a smaller version of the asteroid worm poking its head out to swallow everyone. It's just unnecessary and weak and takes away from some of that mystery that made the original so great. Side note: when I was a kid I totally thought that the Sarlacc Pit was a side entrance to Jabba's stomach, as if somehow Jabba was connected to it. Watch the movie, the first time someone falls into it, he starts wiggling like he's eating him and tasting him. It's weird. It makes a lot more sense since I learned the error of my ways, but it gave my dad a good chuckle.
30. Jealous Han (Return of the Jedi) - Leia loves Han. Han knows. Han loves Leia. Leia knows. So, why when Luke and Leia go off to have the whole "hey, you're my sister" talk, does Han get all jealous? I mean, yea, he's a guy, it's going to happen. But still, this is one of those rare moments where I wouldn't fault the movie for having Han know something he shouldn't yet because the audience already does. You can't do that though. Still though, after all Luke, Han, and Leia have been through together, why would it be weird that Luke and Leia are having a conversation without him? I mean, I know it's for the cute reveal at the end of the battle when Han's all like "okay, I'll back off because you have the hots for Luke" and she's all like "eww gross he's my brother," and Han can get all middle school giddy about it, but still... Han's too cool and too suave a character to get that jealous over something so small so quickly.
29. Anakin complains about Obi-Wan (Attack of the Clones) - This happens twice, first on Coruscant, then again on Tatooine. It's just awkward. We get it, Anakin, you're an angsty teenager with a lot of hate in you and you need to vent. But seriously, get over it. Don't you think that the person put in charge of training you has your best interests at heart? At one point or another in all our lives we've thought that we were too smart to be taught the things that older people were trying to teach us only to, more often than not, find out that yea, no, we're not. That's what this is all about. He's stubborn, he's impatient, he's hot-headed. Hmm.... it's almost like he's destined for the Dark Side. How did no one see this coming?! I mean, I guess you have to show Anakin's emotional journey from Jedi to Sith but I'll blame the writing and maybe a little of the acting on this one.
28. Grievous's intro (Revenge of the Sith) - General Grievous is another character in the Star Wars saga that had great potential that was never realized. His on-screen introduction was just the tip of the iceberg. He walks onto the bridge and before he even speaks, he starts hacking up a lung. He's like 98% machine and yet he has enough natural body parts to have a coughing fit. Just the start of an underwhelming appearance by a really cool character.
27. Jedi Rocks (Return of the Jedi) - Here's the original musical number performed by the Max Rebo Band in Jabba's Palace, called Lapti Nek. Now, here's the new edition, added in in 1997 and titled Jedi Rocks. It's not the song that sucks so much as the grotesque amount of CGI used to animate the band, especially the part where the fuzzy Muppet guy's mouth takes up the whole scene and his saliva is dripping from his teeth. In all the realm of unnecessary. If it hadn't been over-animated maybe it would be better, but if it wasn't over-animated it would have been done with practical effects... in 1983... when the movie came out the first time. And, just in case you wanted to learn way more than you ever wanted to know about the Max Rebo Band, here's this.
26. Luke in the Cave (Empire Strikes Back) - I just don't get it. Luke goes into the cave, Darth Vader comes out of nowhere, Luke chops his head off, Vader's head explodes and Luke's face is in the mask. It's a definite jaw dropper, but I don't get it. Is it supposed to say that if Luke tries to fight Vader he'll become Vader? I mean, I know that's Yoda's fear, but it doesn't happen. When I first saw this I was baffled as to a) how Vader got to Dagobah without Yoda or Luke knowing and b) how Vader knew Luke was there in the first place. And what's with the slow motion? And why that cave? How did the Dark Side of the Force manifest itself enough to decide that "hey, this cave would be a great place to settle down and just be here to do things?" I think comic book guy Yoda sums it up best.
24. Obi-Wan gets crunched by walkway (Revenge of the Sith) - In a movie so reliant on CGI, how are you so bad at CGI?! Obi-Wan's legs should be dead and his body should have convulsed a little bit when Dooku dropped the walkway on him. The CGI quality (or lack thereof) is the sole reason why this is on this list. Also, how did Obi-Wan beat Anakin at the end of this movie but Anakin beat Count Dooku and Obi-Wan lost to Count Dooku twice. I mean, Obi-Wan cut Darth Maul in half and completely maimed Anakin. How does he lose to Dooku twice?
23. C-3PO telling Leia the odds of Luke's and Han's survival (Empire Strikes Back) - I know that C-3PO is a droid, but if he's programmed for human-cyborg relations, why is he so bad at knowing what humans are thinking and feeling? Way to go Anakin! I mean, seriously dude, Luke and Han are out in the barren snow desert of Hoth and probably going to die, and you think it's a good idea to tell Leia, the person that cares about them both the most, that the odds of their survival are 725:1?! Dude. Sure, sure, I get that it's R2-D2 that said it, but we can't understand him, so it's 3PO that gets the blame here. And sure, he does try reassuring Leia that "R2 has been known to be wrong... from time to time." Still not helping! Also, what is it with this movie and giving the odds of things? 725:1 to survive outside on Hoth, 3,720:1 of successfully navigating an asteroid field, 1:1 that I think George Lucas just got bored. Oh, wait. Also, I wish I could go back to June of 1977 and beyond and see/hear the reviews of the first Star Wars movies. Based on how unlikably annoying C-3PO becomes in "Empire Strikes Back," I have to imagine that a lot of those reviews went something like "spectacularly innovative, an instant modern classic, annoying golden robot thing." I like C-3PO... in six out of seven movies (because that cameo in "Rogue One" doesn't count)... in "Empire" he's pretty insufferable.
22. Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon first light lightsabers (Phantom Menace) - Lightsabers are, arguably, the coolest thing about Star Wars. They deserve some kind of respect. There's an sense of excitement every time you hear the sound of one igniting. So, with 16 years between movies appearing in theaters, the first time we see a lightsaber is.... because the Jedi got startled when their ship blew up in the hangar? It's purely reactionary, which isn't bad, but then they realize "oh wait, that was premature lightsaberation," and deactivate them so that they can have that great surprise attack on the droids minutes later. If you ask me, you take out that first ignition and the second one would have been a great first look at the saga's signature weapon.
21. Kylo Ren talks to Darth Vader (Force Awakens) - Ok, so here's the thing... DARTH VADER IS A GOOD GUY! THAT WAS THE WHOLE POINT OF "RETURN OF THE JEDI." So why is Kylo Ren asking his dead grandfather's charred mask to help him go back into the darkness?! Luke, who you betrayed, eliminated that darkness from him, dumbass! Sure, it's a cool scene and you get to see a gratuitous nerdgasm shot of Darth Vader's mask post funeral pyre, but still... it's like no one told him growing up that the Light Side is better and even the darkest soul can return to the light. No wonder Luke lost him as a pupil, he's a terrible teacher. That being said, Luke's probably not a terrible teacher. Also, if he's so in tune with his grandfather, where's Anakin's Force ghost? We know he's (somehow) immortal in the Force, from when he appeared with Obi-Wan and Yoda in front of Luke at the end of "Jedi." So, why can't he appear to Kylo Ren and be like "dude, you're on the wrong side. I turned back. Stop trying to follow the part of me I left behind." Unless..... he does say "let me finish what you started." Maybe he really means "let me finish destroying the Dark Side from within, like you did when you killed the Emperor." Spoiler alert:
20. Kylo Ren's tantrums (Force Awakens) - I like these scenes because there's humor in them. But in terms of character development, they're just wrong. There's a difference between fearing someone because they deserve to be feared and fearing someone because they're crazy (and maybe there's real world current events that illustrate that point). Darth Vader was feared as a leader because he's ruthless and powerful. Kylo Ren is feared as a leader because he's mentally and emotionally unstable. The whole emotionally unstable thing is fine, to a point, because he's going to have a prolonged debate with himself about the what side he's really on, but the whole mental stability thing really puts a damper on his character. The Imperial officers were afraid to deliver bad news to Vader because they knew he'd Force choke them and kill them. The First Order officers are afraid to give Kylo Ren bad news because he goes batshit crazy on whatever equipment is around him and they have to awkwardly stand there and deal with it (or sheepishly turn around and walk the other way). A Sith Lord should not need babysitting, but Kylo Ren needs a timeout.
19. Kylo Ren takes off his mask (Force Awakens) - Why was Darth Vader so terrifying? The mask. Even Bane says "no one cared who I was until I put on the mask." Ben Solo obviously has a Darth Vader fetish and wanted to be just like dear old granddad. Well, sorry to break it to you Ben, Vader needed the mask, and a grateful fan base welcomed it. You however, don't. But, at the same time, if you're going to commit to it, commit to it. He takes the mask off at the first provocation from Rey, a girl he hardly knows at this point. He had Poe in the same interrogation room and didn't take the mask off, so why do it for Rey? "Well, he can tell she's powerful with the Force," okay fine, but even that he doesn't find out, really, for minutes later. I was all excited when I saw Kylo Ren in the trailers, his mask was pretty cool. He was no Darth Vader, but who can be? Still, I was optimistic. Watching the movie in the theaters, I was pretty excited when he first started taking off the mask, and then I thought, "wait, why so early? There's two more movies left to get to this point. Don't ruin it now." They did. He immediately became less intimidating when the mask came off. Then it became a bit of a head scratcher when the mask went back on. Clearly he only wears it when he feels like it, so a) why wear it at all, and b) why wear it when you're inside? It's like wearing sunglasses at night. Sure, maybe the eyes are like the infrared cameras Vader had, or whatever, but it just seems pointless. Keep the mask on, keep us guessing why you're wearing it, and have a big reveal in Episode IX. I guess, though, it was inevitable that he'd take it off, if not for Rey, then for Han. Let's be honest, Han's death scene would have been a lot worse if Kylo Ren had kept the mask on. But then again, maybe Han wouldn't have died if the mask never came off.....
18. Obi-Wan finds out Anakin's the father (Revenge of the Sith) - Talk about over-written. Holy cow! This scene should be heart wrenching for the audience instead of gut wrenching. Obi-Wan is telling Padme that Anakin has turned to the Dark Side, killed younglings, and in the process finds out that the two are married and he's the father of her baby(ies). It should be overly emotional and Ewan McGregor and Natalie Portman, both phenomenal actors, do the best with what they're given, which isn't much. Instead of shedding a tear when Obi-Wan tells her that Anakin killed younglings, I just roll my eyes and chuckle at how forced his getting choked up is. This whole scene is written like one of those campy 1940s/1950s serials with jump cuts all over the place every time someone gets hit, or a really bad soap opera. It just doesn't flow, at all.
17. C-3PO after he gets blown up (Empire Strikes Back) - Sure, there are a few laughs in here, like when Chewbacca first turns 3PO back on and he's blabbering in different languages, and then he's all like "wait I can't see," "wait I'm backwards." But that gets old quick. Now Chewie has to carry him on his back because he hasn't had time to finish putting him together. Okay, fine. But all C-3PO does is whine and complain about it. Look dude, you're a droid. You're an important droid, but you're a droid. You went and got yourself blown up and unlike a living creature, you can be brought back. Be grateful someone found you in time to do that. Chewie could have just left you to melt in the incinerator, Han probably would have. But no, the Wookiee saved you and all you do is whine about how he's not moving fast enough, he's not putting you together right, he's not ducking enough through doorways. You're not alive, you can't feel the pain of bumping your head on a doorway. UGH!
16. Anakin says goodbye to his mother (Phantom Menace) - This one I'm putting squarely on Jake Lloyd's shoulders. I understand that acting is hard. I couldn't do it, at least not well. I understand that kids aren't going to be great at it. But you have a kid who's learning how to act in a movie with a clunky-at-best script and it's bound to be a bit rough (I mean, if Liam Neeson, Natalie Portman, Ewan McGregor, and Samuel L. Jackson can't make this script sound good, what's a 9-year-old going to do?). Ironically, Jake Lloyd's best acting comes in scenes where he's not speaking English. Wrap your head around that. That being said, look, I feel for Anakin, he's leaving his mother. He doesn't have a father. He's essentially choosing to become an orphan. It's one thing for us to move out of the house, we're at the very least still on the same planet as our parents. He's halfway across the galaxy. It's also not like a slave like her is going to have access to hologram communications. But still, this scene is so whiny. He can't wait to leave and become a Jedi until he's actually doing it, then he has to get all "no mom, I don't want to." Again, the writing makes this exchange painful.
15. Padme "lost the will to live" - I mean... what?! Ok, I get it, her beloved Anakin went over the Dark Side and Force choked her into unconsciousness, of course she's be ready to give up. But she has no control over what her body wants to do, unless somehow that's a thing in this galaxy. I mean, you can commit suicide, sure, but you can't inform your body to stop working. (P.S. I don't condone suicide). You want to say, and not imply, that she's dying of a broken heart? Sure, I'll buy that. But to say that she just lost the will to live is a stretch, and that's saying something in a storyline about magical powers, speed of light travel, and alien races. Besides, she's clearly struggling through birth and is in pain (I mean, she's delivering twins), so that to me suggests there's something more wrong with her than just being unwilling to live. If Obi-Wan had any sense in him and wasn't numb from mutilating his best friend and watching his close friend dying in childbirth, he should slap that medical robot upside the head and demand to see his medical degree. Just stupid.
14. Yub Nub snub (Return of the Jedi) - What the hell George Lucas?! You want to release a Director's Cut, sure. But there should be a Hollywood law against going back into your movie and repeatedly changing things you think you got wrong the first time, whether there's a timeframe on it, or a limit to the number of changes or number of times you can change it, I don't know. Imagine Victor Fleming going back and changing things in the Wizard of Oz because he thought a blue brick road would look better than a yellow brick road, or that jade green slippers were better than ruby red slippers. NO! That being said, as I mentioned earlier, I like the new ending to "Return of the Jedi," it brings the prequels into the mix with the sequels showing the celebrations on other planets while showing the main heroes celebrating on Endor. However, it's the song that ruins it. I'm not faulting John Williams in the least bit. Everything he writes is gold. The new celebration song is gold too. But, it's no Yub Nub. Here's the scene as it is now with the new song. Here's the original celebration with Yub Nub. I guarantee there's a way to fit the cut scenes to Naboo, Coruscant, Tatooine, and Bespin into the original ending with the same song. Yub Nub is so much better and more fitting because it sounds like that's exactly the song that the Ewoks would be playing and singing in that moment. The new song is film score. Characters aren't supposed to be aware of film score, so why are they dancing? Yub Nub is the Ewoks' song, down to the one Ewok using the trooper helmets as a xylophone which they attempt to recreate in the new ending, but it's not the same. All I'm saying is, give me back my Yub Nub.
13. Obi-Wan's point of view (Return of the Jedi) - I'm with Luke, Obi-Wan lied to him about his father. I'm not buying the whole "what I told you is true, from a certain point of view." The first time I saw that, I was like "oooooh, that's clever. That Obi-Wan is good." Now, I just see it as George Lucas having written himself into a corner with Obi-Wan's explanation of Anakin's fate in "A New Hope," but then deciding that he wanted Vader to be Anakin and therefore Luke's dad in "Empire Strikes Back," and having to rectify the discrepancy three years later when people called him out on it. Maybe he planned it all along though. Either way, I'm throwing the challenge flag. Think about it. Only one of them, Obi-Wan or Darth Vader, can be right. Obi-Wan tells Luke that Darth Vader betrayed and murdered Anakin. But Anakin became Darth Vader. Depending on your point of view, they're both correct. However, if Darth Vader did indeed murder Anakin, then Darth Vader cannot be Luke's father because that person is dead. Sure, a DNA test would prove that Darth Vader is biologically Luke's father, but then Vader has to acknowledge that he is, or at least was, Anakin Skywalker, which he's unwilling to do. In "Return of the Jedi" he even says that name holds no meaning for him anymore, which we know is a lie by the end of the movie, but still. Even the Emperor refers to Luke as the "son of Anakin Skywalker," thus implying that Anakin no longer exists and that Darth Vader killed him. If this is true, then Kylo Ren should not have stopped on the bridge when Han called out "Ben." I mean, sure, he recognizes the voice, and he wants to kill Han Solo, but why is he answering to his old name if he truly did "destroy him?" Why does he talk about the pain he has of being torn apart (presumably by the emotions tied to his father) if he destroyed that part of himself?
12. Obi-Wan leaves Anakin alive (Revenge of the Sith) - Obviously Obi-Wan has to leave Anakin alive because the next
11. Anakin kills younglings (Revenge of the Sith) - I get it. Every Jedi has to die, for the plot of this movie and the plot of the next three, but seriously?! You have to kill the kids? They're like kindergartners. If you were to kill all the teachers of a school and turn the kindergartners loose on the world, what harm could they do? They don't know anything. So, kill all the Jedi adults and let the kids go. There's no one to teach them the ways of the Force, they don't really know enough to do much damage other than maybe make books fly across a room. That being said, I'm glad they didn't actually show Anakin killing the younglings, if they did it probably would have been an R rated movie. Even so, it's still a brutal scene. How cute is that kid that stands there hiding behind, ironically, Mace Windu's Jedi Council chair and asks Anakin what they should do? He's adorable! The one thing I wish they showed is that when Anakin turns on his lightsaber and the kid jumps in surprise, that all the kids would have/should have turned on their lightsabers, so that way at least we know they didn't go down without a fight.
10. Palpatine killing Jedi Masters (Revenge of the Sith) - Darth Sidious/Emperor Palpatine is clearly a force to be reckoned with and, seeing as how none of the four Jedi that came to arrest him are in the original trilogy, you knew Palpatine was going to win that fight and kill all four of the Jedi. But, what was unnecessary was how easily he killed three of them. Agen Kolar and Saesee Tiin are killed within seconds and Kit Fisto doesn't last much longer. Then it's just Mace Windu against Palpatine. What was the point of bringing four Jedi Masters to arrest the chancellor if three of them are going to be useless? You want to show off how powerful Palpatine is as a Sith Lord, have him take on four Jedi Masters by himself for a longer, sustainable amount of time, kill them off slowly, like 30 seconds apart across a two minute fight or so. But it's four lightsabers against one! But, at the same time, Palpatine has two lightsabers seen in the fight with Darth Maul and Savage Opress in "The Clone Wars." So where's his second lightsaber? Why not use both? You're telling me that it wouldn't have been more awesome to see Darth Sidious with two lightsabers taking on four Jedi Masters for several minutes killing them one at a time before taking on Mace Windu with two, or even one (if you show one getting broken), lightsabers for another minute or more? Pad the run time, I don't care. I think it's a dishonor to the rank of Jedi Master that three of the four that came to arrest the Chancellor died so easily. How did they even become Jedi Masters in the first place, if they can't at least somewhat handle a Sith Lord? After all, it was Obi-Wan that said "Sith Lords are our specialty."
9. Mace Windu's Death (Revenge of the Sith) - Which brings me to my next point. Mace Windu's death sucked. It was great. But it sucked. One, because he's such a cool character and it's Samuel L. Jackson, but two, there were things about it that didn't sit well with me. So, the lightsaber duel between him and Palpatine was cool. The lightsabers blowing out the windows, cool. The whole Force lightning/disfiguration thing, cool. What I didn't like was Anakin stepping in and advocating for the Chancellor (which for the plot he had to do) and then cutting off Mace Windu's hand. You want to have Anakin intervene? Fine, he has to turn to the Dark Side sooner or later. But, hear me out, why not have Anakin just use his lightsaber to stop Mace Windu's lightsaber and then have them start dueling for a bit, or just lock lightsabers for a few seconds and then Palpatine blasts him out the window because he's distracted by the lightsabers. But, yea, then Anakin isn't directly responsible for Windu's death, but then again, Palpatine is a master of manipulation, so trust me, he'd find a way to make Anakin believe it was his fault. After all, he made Anakin believe he killed Padme. Part of my point, like I said earlier, when you have such a cool character, especially one played by such a famous actor, it's hard to kill off that character and do it justice. I'm not sure this one was done as much justice as it could have been done, even though it could have been a lot worse. Like those three I mentioned directly above.
8. Qui-Gon's Death (Phantom Menace) - Again, it's Liam Neeson, how are you going to kill him off in the first movie? He certainly has to die by the end of the third, but the end of the first?! I know you have to get to the point where Obi-Wan is training Anakin so that the dialogue in "A New Hope" holds true, but still... one movie?! This one they did him a little bit of justice. Obi-Wan was out of this fight for a good portion of it and Qui-Gon held his own against Darth Maul's double-sided lightsaber before Maul took a cheap shot, using something other than his lightsaber, to disarm Qui-Gon enough to deal a fatal blow. What a jerk. I mean, I guess all's fair in lightsaber duels, but still, isn't there some sort of etiquette? Pretty sure the Olympic judges would disqualify a fencer if they threw something at their opponent. Maybe. Also, minutes later, Obi-Wan cuts Darth Maul's lightsaber in half making it a one blade vs. one blade fight. Maybe I'm wrong, but there's a few times prior where it looks like Qui-Gon's blade hit Maul's hilt and somehow the double-bladed lightsaber remained intact. What gives?!
7. Darth Maul's Death (Phantom Menace) - What do you know? It's like I planned this. Also, disregard the scream at the end of the clip. I figured since you stuck with me this long I would try to keep the clips short and not make you watch the entire fight from the beginning. You're welcome. Anyway... seriously, this sucked. Darth Maul is such a cool bad guy. He's got the horns, he's got the facepaint/tattoos/native markings, he's got a double-sided lightsaber. He's dark and mysterious, you know, the strong and silent type. He's probably the coolest villain the Star Wars saga could ask for after Darth Vader. You can't really top a Vader, but the potential Maul had was close. And what, he dies in a surprise attack by Obi-Wan, who didn't even have the high ground? I don't honestly think that Darth Sidious's whole "start the Clone Wars and become Emperor" plan would have worked if Count Dooku hadn't become his apprentice. Given Count Dooku's Wookieepedia entry, he didn't turn to the Dark Side until after the events of the "Phantom Menace." Yet, given the dialogue in "Attack of the Clones" and "The Clone Wars," I have a hard time believing this. As I mentioned earlier, it seems more likely to me that Darth Sidious had both Dooku and Maul as apprentices at the same time, violating the "Rule of Two," which Dooku did anyway when he had Asajj Ventress, Qunilan Vos, and Savage Opress as his own apprentices at any given time. Anyway, it still seems like a waste to have Darth Maul's time on screen cut so short just to further the story of the prequel saga. And I'm sure there is a way to rework the story to include a bigger role for Darth Maul in "Attack of the Clones" and/or "Revenge of the Sith" while still getting the same point across.
6. Hayden Christensen Force ghost (Return of the Jedi) - Ok, I'll admit, the first time I saw this I was like "oh! Ha! That's kinda cool." I have since realized the errors of my way. Sure, it's cool that they can edit a video 30 years after the fact with transparency and all that. Anyway, the more I see it, the more it bothers me. Firstly, because this scene was the only scene Sebastian Shaw is in with his whole face, and unscarred face seen. Now, you could make the argument that it should be David Prowse instead, but that's a different argument for another day. Now, slighting Sebastian Shaw aside, from a story standpoint this doesn't make sense. Sure, it further ties the two trilogies together and the first explanation anyone gave me for why this change was made is because "now it reflects Anakin as he was when he died and Darth Vader took over." Oh. Ok. But wait, really?! So, I guess that whole battle you just fought with Darth Vader that ended with Vader throwing Palpatine down the chasm in the Death Star, then Vader asking Luke to take his mask off was for nothing? That's the moment that Darth Vader again became Anakin Skywalker, so that argument loses all credibility. Young Anakin doesn't even look like he belongs in that scene. I would imagine that the original scene was filmed with Sebastian Shaw, puppet Yoda and Frank Oz, and Alec Guinness all standing next to each other and using appropriate body movements in relation to the other actors. Then, you go and put Hayden Christensen's head on Sebastian Shaw's body (seriously, that's what they did), and it just doesn't match up. Originally Anakin and Obi-Wan end up looking at each other like "oh hey, look, we're friends again." Now, Obi-Wan looks at Anakin while Anakin is looking down and smiling like "yea, this is a thing now." It's just yet another useless change that no one ask for or wanted (except for maybe Hayden Christensen).
5. All (or most) scenes involving Anakin and Padme's romance (Episodes I-III) - I'm putting this one all on George Lucas. I've said for a while, he's a great idea man, and I'll give him a solid rating on directing, but his screenwriting and dialogue leaves a lot to be desired. If I ever meet him, maybe I'll be apologetic and have a decent explanation, until then, that's my opinion. Sorry, George. I mean, Natalie Portman is an Oscar winning actress and Hayden Christensen is.... Hayden Christensen? It takes talent to make Natalie Portman look and sound like a bad actress. These scenes are so clunky and awkward, I don't think even a real life couple that are the most in love with each other could read some of these lines and pull them off. This love story is essential to the story. The whole reason Anakin becomes Darth Vader is to save Padme from dying in child birth (though, you could argue that she wouldn't have been in danger of dying from childbirth if Anakin hadn't turned to the Dark Side or force choked her, so it's like a Terminator-esque paradox). Anyway, Anakin and Padme should and could have been one of the iconic and best on-screen movie couples and their story one of the sweetest ones out there. A Jedi, forbidden to find love and commit to someone, and a Senator too focused on her career both fall victim to love and can't resist the lure of romance. It's almost as improbable a love story as Romeo and Juliet. The difference is that George Lucas is no Shakespeare, but Shakespeare... is Shakespeare. As I pointed out, Carrie Fisher didn't think she could say "I thought I recognized your foul stench when I was brought on board" with an American accent, so she went British. So clearly the Star Wars galaxy has a different way of talking. But the audience watching the movie is still earthbound. So, having Padme tell young Anakin "things will change when we reach the capital but my caring for you will remain?" Who talks like that! Don't even get me started on this scene. The problem with this scene, and really all of these scenes is that normal couples don't talk like this, no matter how in love they are! I mean, sure, maybe you sit your significant other down and say "what three things do you like most about me" and it becomes a cute thirty minute exchange that may or may not lead to extracurriculars. I don't hate the Anakin and Padme romance. Like I said it's essential. There are times where it's actually kind of cute. But the majority of the time it's just awkward and uncomfortable. It's much more tolerable in "The Clone Wars," for what that's worth. Also, in my YouTube expeditions for clips, I came across this deleted scene, which is fun and interesting, but I can see why they cut it. I mean, there are points where this movie drags enough, and this really would have slowed things down. But it's cool insight into Padme's life, and might have been better than some other scenes that actually made the final cut.
3. "If you're not with me, you're my enemy" (Revenge of the Sith) - George, George, George. If you're going to use cliche dialogue, at least get it right. The line is "if you're not with me, you're against me." But really, of all the possible lines you could have put here, this is the one you go with?! I mean, Anakin wants Obi-Wan to join him and together they can defeat the Emperor and rule the galaxy (why is that always everyone's option?). Logically, Obi-Wan says no. So, why not have him say something like "well, if you won't join me, then I'm sorry, my friend, but I have to eliminate you," or "well, I can't have you standing in my way, so prepare to die." I mean, I'm not a screenwriter, but part of my daily job responsibilities involve writing. Those two lines probably aren't even the best I could come up with. Give me more time, dedicated to solely writing the movie script for this movie and I could probably come up with something better than those two lines. But the point I'm making is, those two lines, I think, are possibly better than the line in the movie, which is a cliche line that is WRONG! I have no problem with movie cliches, but all I can ask is if you're going to use one, at least get it right.
2. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! (Revenge of the Sith) - Ok, I get it,
1. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! (Return of the Jedi) - Why George Lucas? Why? The first time I watched "Return of the Jedi" (pre-Special Edition and Blu Ray re-edit) I LOVED this scene. Luke's dying, the Emperor's killing him, Vader's standing there badly injured and watching his boss kill his son. What's he going to do? He's looking back and forth and back and forth and then lunges for the Emperor, picks him up, and tosses him down the chasm to his death. I mean, I was eight years old, but I honestly did not see that coming. I was sitting in my living room starting at the TV with my jaw dropped and a dorky smile on my face, turning to look at my dad saying "what just happened?!" It was so cool! Then, I hear that there are big changes coming to the Blu Ray edition and I think "uh oh, what else could happen to this trilogy?!" I had heard that there was talk of Vader's "NOOOO" from "Revenge of the Sith" would make an appearance in this scene and I just cringed. Then, when I watched it I wanted to cry. Not really, but kind of. It totally ruins the scene. Completely and utterly ruins it. The whole point of the scene isn't even to have the element of surprise for the eight-year-olds like me watching Star Wars for the first time, but it's most the storytelling element of having the internal struggle of good vs evil, right vs wrong, family vs friends/mentor that is going on inside Vader's head. At it's core, it's Anakin vs Darth Vader. This is the defining moment that Vader reclaims his identity as Anakin Skywalker. It's one of, if not the most powerful moments in the entire saga. But yea, the element of surprise makes it even better. Now, they whole "No. No. NOOO" tells you exactly what Vader's going to do before he does it, ruins the surprise of what he does, and eliminated that whole internal struggle. I mean, nothing is perfect, but this scene was as close to perfect as you can get the first time around, and then wham. Not perfect. Every time I watch the Blu Ray edition, I come dangerously close to hitting the mute button when this scene comes around, but unfortunately you then lose John Williams's awesome score and the sound effects of the lightning. Not a fair trade. Plus, I'm too lazy to find the remote, which at that point has probably fallen between the cushions or on the floor. This Lucas change alone is the reason why I want Disney to re-release the saga on Blu Ray or whatever format comes in the next generation of home movies, and put the movies back to the way they were, at least in the changes that dramatically effect the storyline. Those cutaway scenes of Bespin or Mos Eisley, I don't mind those, but something like this is just egregious.
See that wasn't so bad. I'm sorry if one of my worst moments was one of your best moments, but maybe my insight at least made a little sense to you, and I'm sorry if I ruined it for you and changed your opinion (not that I'm that arrogant to think I have that ability). No one moment on that list though will prevent me from watching any of the movies.
But what about those moments in the movie that aren't necessarily bad or good, they're just there. Now, there's a lot of those moments, but these moments I'm talking about are those that are trying to be important or monumental moments that just fall short and don't really land with me.
"Do or do not, there is no try" - Moments in Star Wars that just fall flat
This isn't really anything I can rank, so rather than apply any sort of ranking to them, random or otherwise, I'll just run through them chronologically. And, just to throw a wrench in this whole post, chronologically according to story, not viewing order. Oh the mayhem.
Episode I: The Phantom Menace
"You were right about one thing, the negotiations were short" - Haha, Obi-Wan's got jokes. It's nice to know that after almost being gassed and killed by destroyer droids, that he can use his master's words against him to make a joke. At the time I thought it was funny, as I've rewatched it several times, it just comes off as Obi-Wan being an insubordinate smartass. I guess being in the moment, knowing you're close to escape and survival, it's a good kind of "we can laugh at it now" moment, but can they? They still have to stowaway aboard an enemy ship to the planet's surface, and then avoid all the troops deployed by the time they land. If you ask me, this line would have been more fitting later, on Naboo, after Qui-Gon saves Jar Jar. But, by then the original line would have already been forgotten.
The descent to Otoh Gunga - Ok, so this is kind of cool still. I mean, you have this crazy frog dinosaur looking guy that talks funny just go and jump into a swamp that doesn't look all that deep, the Jedi swim in after him with cool underwater breathing things and then out of nowhere, BOOM, underwater city. The reason why I'm putting this down here on the "it tried" list is because it's cool... until you realize it's 100% CGI. I'm not unrealistic, I know that it would be impractical to have created this shot with practical effects, but it's kind of the first "big shot" of the movie that tries to wow you with the "awe factor," and it did... in 1999.
Invasion of Naboo - Here and here. Part of the awesomeness of these shots rely on the score of John Williams. Other than that, I'm putting this on the list for the same reasons as listed above. The CGI doesn't look quite as good in 2017 as it did in 1999.
Darth Maul's introduction - Much like Darth Maul's death, I don't think this way of introducing him does his character credit. I mean, sure, it's dramatic and he appears literally out of nowhere, but you introduce the coolest character in a hologram. Really? I honestly don't know how else you could have done it, but it just seems like he deserves a little more. Am I crazy? (says the guy writing a pages long analysis of Star Wars). Also, what's the range on a hologram? How far behind Darth Sidious does Darth Maul have to stand to not be in the hologram until the dramatic moment? I mean, we see in "Revenge of the Sith" that Yoda is teleconferencing in to the Jedi Council from Kashyyyk and Tarful and Chewbacca are standing right behind him, but aren't in the hologram? I demand answers! Also, why are two random Wookiees allowed to listen in on a Jedi Council meeting?
Anakin and Padme meet - Oddly enough, one of the cutest moments in the Anakin/Padme romance. I mean, the adorable little bowl cut kid asks if she's an Angel? Awwww! But, here's the thing, they live on the moons of Iego, I think? Angels exist in the Star Wars galaxy?! What? Also, when she finds out he's a slave he responds with "I'm a person and my name is Anakin." Aren't all slaves people, or at least sentient beings? Stop being an idiot Anakin! For two characters so important to the plot, this first meeting is a little underwhelming. Also, the age difference. He's 9, she's 14 (and somehow the Queen of a planet). I know that's only five years, but they're going to get married and at this moment in their lives that seems ridiculous. Age is all about perspective, 14 and 9 are miles apart, but 30 and 25 are around the same age, and 100 and 95 are basically the same age. So, hold off a few years before you go tying the knot. Oh, you did? Good. Also, Anakin, yes, Natalie Portman is an angel.
The Virgince in the Force - Qui-Gon is lamenting that Anakin was not born inside the Republic because otherwise the Jedi would have looked for him, found him, and killed him. Wait, wrong Liam Neeson movie. What I meant to say was, the Jedi would have discovered him and started training him earlier. Then he asks Shmi who his father was and she says there was no father and that she can't explain it. It's kind of a cool moment, but I'm putting it here because I was ten going on eleven when "Phantom Menace" came out and I thought Shmi's whole "there was no father" just meant that like, he left them after she got pregnant and that he's not worth talking about and might as well not exist. Then, later when Qui-Gon tells the Council that he may have discovered a virgance in the Force, I didn't know what that word meant. I thought it was just maybe like, a kid that has Jedi potential but wasn't born in the Republic so we didn't know about him and he's older than he should be to start the training, but we should train him anyway. But then again, I grew up loving Hocus Pocus and didn't know why it was such a big deal or the joke about Max lighting the candle because he was a virgin. Now, it's funny and I get it.
Jabba the Hutt - Probably one of the longest Easter Eggs in film history. Does Jabba's inclusion in this movie add anything? Not really. He, or some other Hutt, already got referenced when they were trying to find a place to land their ship and determined that Tatooine was controlled by the Hutts. Then, Anakin mentions how he and his mom were lost in a bet by Gardulla the Hutt. This movie is some 30-40 years before Return of the Jedi and yet Jabba the Hutt is old enough to be powerful enough to lord over a podrace? Also, Jabba's married? I know he has a son, who's Hutt-napping becomes the subject a few episodes of "The Clone Wars," but without showing Jabba in Episode I or having another Hutt, appearing to be his wife, behind him, then you don't need to invent a son for the cartoon. Honestly, I don't like seeing Jabba being in control and "out in the open." His role in "Jedi" was of a crime lord on the outskirts, and presumably an outlaw. Much like the mob on Earth, they operate outside the law, but still have enough pull and power to avoid getting arrested. Now, he's just the guy in charge of the biggest podrace in the galaxy. It just doesn't make sense. When did Tatooine become part of the Republic/Empire and force Jabba into relative exile? So many questions.
Darth Maul's first fight with Qui-Gon - As I've pointed out, Darth Maul is awesome. But the first time he lights up his lightsaber, he only uses one side and it's pointless. The only reason, plot relative, to have Darth Maul fight Qui-Gon on Tatooine is so that Qui-Gon can tell the council that he thinks the Sith are back. Realistically, this is also the only reason that Ki-Adi Mundi has any lines in Episode I. But, think about it, it's a useless lightsaber fight, after all, Darth Maul only uses one of his two blades which makes for an awkwardly long hilt. It doesn't last that long, because Ric Olie flies over to rescue Qui-Gon and he escapes before the good part of the fight comes around. If you're going to make the case that "well, the Jedi Council needs to know that the Sith are back," then I say, yea, sure... but doesn't that happen anyway when Darth Maul fights Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon, killing the latter? Mace Windu and Yoda then talk at Qui-Gon's funeral about how there's no doubt that the identity of their attacker was a Sith Lord. Ok, so take away the first fight and maybe they're less likely to come to this conclusion since they haven't been thinking about it for the last few... hours? days? what's the exact time frame of this movie anyway? It's like two or three days, at most, and yet a lot happens. Anyway, so, the Jedi Council don't have those few days to debate the legitimacy of the claim of the Sith's return. But, you're telling me that Obi-Wan won't get a debriefing and tell the Council all about the duel? Surely they would come to the same conclusion that Darth Maul was a Sith Lord. So, basically what I'm saying is, Darth Maul's first lightsaber fight pales in comparison to his last and didn't really need to happen.
Padme reveals herself to be Queen Amidala - I actually really like the whole Padme is actually the Queen and using the decoys. Did you know that the decoy featured in this movie is Keira Knightley? It's true. Talk about soon-to-be-starpower! Anyway, the big reveal of Padme being the Queen is cool, but at the same time not. I knew going into the theaters that Natalie Portman was playing Queen Amidala. I forget if I had read that in a preview article or online or wherever, but point is, I knew it. So, yea, I was perhaps more confused than surprised when all of a sudden Natalie Portman is a handmaiden and not the queen. But still kinda figured, oh she must be pretending to not be the queen. Sure enough, I was right. But here's why this scene also doesn't make sense. Boss Nass doesn't think highly of the Naboo, clearly, but he still just takes Padme's word on the fact that she's actually the Queen?! No presentation of identification, or any kind of sign? If he didn't trust them before, why is he going to trust them now that they either a) brought a fake queen before him, or b) have a handmaiden pretending to be the queen. For that matter, when they're retaking the palace and get captured and brought before the viceroy, why does Nute Gunray talk to Padme like she's the queen? We know she's the queen, but he's never seen her sans makeup. So what reason does he have to assume that this plain Jane of a girl is the queen. Then, Keira Knightley and crew show up and Gunray sends the droids after them because "oh, she's the real queen." The Naboo Queen wears fancy clothes and traditional makeup. Padme is in neither. He has no basis for thinking she's the queen, and no reason again to relent to signing a new treaty when they surprise him with the blasters hidden in the throne. What should have followed is "I don't negotiate with servants," and then she shoots him.
Episode II: Attack of the Clones
Padme's Decoy - Based on the opening crawl, we know or assume that the ship being shown escorted by two Naboo starfighters is that of now-Senator Amidala. When the ship blows up on the landing platform as Padme is descending the ramp it's supposed to be a suspenseful moment. It's not. By 2002 Natalie Portman in on her way to stardom, if not already there. You're not going to kill her off in the first minute. Also, she's the mother of Anakin's children, who, if you're unaware, are fairly important to the plot of the movies that come after this one. Maybe, though they're going to pull a 180 on us and have Anakin's love interest actually be someone other than Padme, in which case you could kill her off but... yea... no... So, nice try. Not buying that she's dead, and kind of upset that you thought I could be fooled by the whole "I use decoys/loyal bodyguards" thing.
"We do have R2 with us" - Anakin is assigned to protect Padme and the two are sent to Naboo to hide away safely. They're instructed to travel as refugees so as to not draw attention. The two are discussing the seriousness of the situation and whatnot and in an attempt to lighten the mood Anakin says if the get into trouble, "don't worry. We have R2 with us." Hardy har har. Ok, so it's kind of funny. But at the same time, it's not. Look at all the things R2 has done. He bails out almost every character that he's with at the time in every sticky situation they're in. R2 repaired the shields on queen's cruiser, helped Anakin blow up the trade federation ship, his heroics in the droid factory, reassembling C-3PO on Geonosis, his work with the elevators on Grievous's ship, THE TRASH COMPACTOR, need I go on?! So yea, Anakin, while you think you're making a joke, I hope you do get into trouble because you will be glad you have R2 with you because he will save the day (and yes, I just officially declared that R2 is a male astromech droid).
Jar Jar is to blame for... everything - To say that people hated Jar Jar after Episode I is probably an understatement. I don't get it. I liked him. I thought he was funny. I was eleven. Sure, in hindsight, he probably could have been toned down a bit, but hey, he was comic relief. He did his job. But, people hated him. So, to make up for, George Lucas and the creative team said, let's make him directly responsible for the fall of the Republic. Ok, so he didn't manipulate every level of government and pulls strings for over a decade to eventually accomplish his goal of taking over the galaxy. That was Palpatine's job. But, to set all of that in motion, from the legality standpoint, someone had to call for a vote to give the Chancellor emergency powers to address the Separatist's mounting numbers. That person was Jar Jar. Those emergency powers led to more emergency powers, led to constitutional amendments, led to Palpatine staying in office longer than his term, led to the end of the war and the formation of the Empire. It's all Jar Jar's fault. He gets banished from his hometown for crashing a heyblibber and then gets saddled with the darkest period in galactic history because the audience didn't find him funny? What a rub!
"This is such a drag." "I'm quite beside myself." - C-3PO's got jokes? Since when? He's a protocol droid, he has no beside manner, but apparently has a sense of humor. I guarantee you he didn't understand that he even made those jokes. Is intentionally funny actually funny? I once entered nine good jokes and one bad joke into a contest hoping at least one would win, but no pun in ten did. See? Not funny. C-3PO is not funny. Stop trying to make that happen. He's supposed to be the smart, grounded, stoic, slightly annoying one. Leave the comedy to.... Jar Jar? Look, they're clever, if not the most literal, jokes. But it is not in C-3PO's character to make jokes! Also, given the dialogue that all of these characters have spewed out in the 40 year existence of Star Wars, I find it real hard to believe that anyone in that universe would call anything "a drag."
Episode III: Revenge of the Sith
Grievous fights with four lightsabers - You thought Darth Maul's double bladed lightsaber was cool? Well, George Lucas says "hold my beer." Here's a half-droid, half-human, half-dog thing that's fighting with four lightsabers at once. What?! So cool, right! Yea, not really. I mean, yea it is cool... for the ten seconds it lasts. General Grievous's arms have the same fight tactic as any group of bad guys in any movie ever. Fight the good guy one at a time while the others stand around and watch so that the good guy can beat everybody. Instead, how about taking the good guy down by all attacking him at the same time! Not once does Grievous swing all four lightsabers at Obi-Wan at once. Realistically, I don't care how skilled Obi-Wan is, there's no way he's surviving this. When Grievous is doing the whole windmill thing with the two lightsabers and Obi-Wan thrusts into the middle of it to disrupt him, Grievous's other two arms don't immediately swing in and cut him in half. Why?! Oh.... the plot... Obi-Wan has to make to "A New Hope." Right. I forgot. Prequels are frustrating. Almost as frustrating as Grievous's coolest moment being cut short (pun intended) by Obi-Wan severing off limbs and thus decreasing the number of lightsabers he has to defend against until it's a manageable two. I mean, good for Obi-Wan for defending himself well, but what's up with him and cutting off limbs and appendages? It's like a fetish for him! Anyway, you want to prove how awesome a fighter Obi-Wan is, have him (somehow) successfully defend himself against four lightsabers at once for longer than the ten seconds it lasts.
Anakin turns to the Dark Side - This is a monumental moment in the saga. It's the moment that bridges the two trilogies together, really, and yet I don't think I'm alone in thinking it was rather underwhelming. Emotionally, it's the right time for Anakin to turn, but it just doesn't seem right. I don't know what the process was for Darth Maul or Count Dooku to officially join the Dark Side, but I always kind of envisioned some kind of knighting ceremony, or some kind of ritual with some ancient Sith artifacts to officially declare yourself a Sith Lord. Apparently not. All you have to do is tell your new Sith Master that you want to be a Sith and he gives you a new Sith name. It's like when Michael declared bankruptcy, and Oscar tells him "you can't just say it and make it happen," (I didn't say it, I declared it). Just because Anakin says he's now a Sith doesn't mean he actually is a Sith. I mean, sure, he became very Sithish (that's a word, right?) when he killed all the Jedi in the Temple including the (force back Obi-Wan tears) younglings. But is that enough? Imagine how many horcruxes that created (whoops, wrong story). I guess I just wanted to see something more substantial than him turning to the Dark Side in a moment of weakness, and some more legitimate process of him doing so. Also, does it bother anyone else that Palpatine had to pause for a second and think about what Anakin's Sith name will be? He straight up told Grievous after Dooku's death that Anakin will be his next apprentice. You're telling me in the, presumably, weeks between Dooku's death and Anakin's turn that Palpatine didn't once think about what Sith name he would give to Anakin? It's not like Anakin's turn to the Dark Side was the equivalent of walking to the fridge and saying "Umm.... I think I'll have...... hmmm.... eggs for breakfast." This is something he could have had decided well in advance, especially if he's gifted with foresight.
Order 66 - I don't want to take away the tragedy of the scene. It's tough to watch if you're fully immersed in the movie and the storyline. It's sad. But... it left a lot to be desired. For one, some explanation as to how the clones went from that cute moment of Cody giving Obi-Wan his lightsaber back, to gunning him down in a manner of minutes. You're telling me there's not one clone that didn't go all Billy Bob in "Armageddon?" It just seems unlikely to me that a truly free thinking clone would be okay with this. Sure, they have orders, and the easy excuse is "their loyalty to the Republic and the Chancellor supersedes their loyalty to the Jedi." But, push comes to shove, who is a US soldier going to obey in a crisis, their level headed general, or a President issuing questionable orders? It's a tough decision and a no-win situation, for sure. Now, if you watch "The Clone Wars," there's a several episode arc centering around the discovery of an inhibitor switch in the clones that essentially make "Order 66" like turning Bucky into the Winter Soldier. But never is that explained in the movies. So we're left wondering. Also, like Kit Fisto,
Yoda vs. Sidious - I'm not saying this isn't a great fight, but compared to the Obi-Wan vs. Anakin fight that it's spliced together with, this one isn't nearly as cool. Despite there actually being more at stake in this one, there seems to be less at stake because there's not nearly as much emotion involved. It's a CGI Yoda (although, admittedly great CGI) against a deformed Ian McDiarmid, who's fighting style in both of his scenes just appears awkward. I honestly don't see how Yoda loses this fight, other than that he can't kill the Emperor because, you know, the next movies. I know that Palpatine is a powerful Sith Lord, the likes of which the galaxy hasn't seen for, apparently, a millennium, but the fact that Yoda, who's been around for almost a millennium himself isn't better than Palpatine? Sure, it's a fairly evenly matched fight, but Yoda's the one that flees! But, "you don't know the power of the dark side." I get it. But... if the Dark Side really is more powerful, which Yoda tells Luke it isn't, but if it were, wouldn't everyone tap into the Dark Side for the powers but still stay on the Light Side? Which also begs the question, are Jedi capable of learning how to use Force Lightning, they just choose not to? And why not? Perhaps it's seen as too violent or strictly an offensive power and the Jedi only use defensive powers, but even that's a stretch. Anyway, Yoda is better than Palpatine and everyone knows it.
Tarkin and the Death Star - I'll admit, it is a cool scene. To see Darth Vader and the Emperor as we know them, on a Star Destroyer overseeing the construction of the Death Star with a younger Grand Moff Tarkin hits all the fanboy nostalgia nerve centers. I understand the process of aging and whatnot, but the Revenge of the Sith Tarkin does not look like I think Peter Cushing Tarkin would look 19 years prior. It's also 19 years, plus any of that weird time warp aging stuff that happens with travelling at lightspeed or around different stars (and now my head hurts thinking about it). Also, how long has the Death Star been under construction already? They look like they're pretty far along considering that the next scene is Obi-Wan handing Luke over to his aunt and uncle and Luke is maybe a few days old. So, the only way that they could be that far along is if construction had started well before the whole "Imperial Reconstruction" thing. Which, knowing Palpatine, is pretty likely. What would have happened, though, if he started building the Death Star and then Mace Windu had beaten him and arrested and/or killed him? The Senate just somehow finds out that he had secretly been building a planet destroying space station? Then what? And... how long does it take to build a Death Star? I have to ask, because it takes 19 years for them to finish building this one before it's fully operational in "A New Hope," yet, in the six years between "A New Hope" and "Return of the Jedi" they build a whole new, bigger Death Star in less than half the time. How?! Also, when did the opening scene of "Rogue One" take place? Galen Erso, from what the movie says, was part of the Death Star planning from the start, left, and then went back in that first scene when Krennic hunted him down. So, did he start planning the Death Star and leave before they started construction? Or did that scene happen in the span of the few days between Anakin putting on the Darth Vader armor and Luke going to his aunt and uncle on Tatooine. Someone map this out for me.
Closing shot of Owen and Beru - In case you wanted to see the Tarkin and Death Star scene, before skipping ahead to the end of the linked video to see the scene I'll now be railing on. I like backstory, as I've said. So it's cool to see exactly how the events of "A New Hope" were set up with this handing off of Luke from Obi-Wan to his aunt and uncle. It's also artistic and symbolic (of something) to have Owen standing in the same pose in the same place as Luke so famously did in "A New Hope." It's cool. But, why? Why is Owen doing that? Why did Luke do it? Well, Luke was frustrated with his uncle and just went outside to brood. Owen's doing it for symmetry. But, inside the universe, I can only picture Owen taking a young Luke outside and telling him "now Luke, this is my favorite place on the whole farm. Sometimes I just stand here with one foot on this little hill here and stare off into the horizon and brood. Go ahead, give it a try." So, Luke did, and he liked it. We've had enough Easter Eggs in three prequel movies, and more than enough in the last ten minutes of this movie to last us a lifetime, this one is just overkill and tried way too hard.
Rogue One
Saw Guerrera's Death - Who is Saw Guerrera? Seriously. I have no idea. It's Forest Whitaker in a life support suit. But I know nothing about him. He's in "The Clone Wars," but as a young kid who's sister is a much better and cooler character than he is. He's a hot head that acts before he thinks and causes a lot of problems. I know that he's featured more prominently in "Rebels," but as I said, I haven't watched that yet. So, I don't care much about him. The Death Star destroys Jedha City and in the wake of that destruction is Saw Guerrera's lair. We have this shot of him standing in the doorway bracing for impact and his imminent death and we're meant to feel sad and a sense of dread. Instead, I'm left thinking "oh, well that sucks for him, but so what?"
Darth Vader's tower - Sure, it's a great transition shot that leads to a pretty cool scene with a lot of Darth Vader badassery. But, I have a hard time believing that Anakin/Vader would build a tower on the same planet where he was maimed and burned to within an inch of death. It doesn't make sense. He hates his home planet of Tatooine because of the sand, and I'm sure he has zero desire to return a third time after his mom died, so why is he willing to go back to Mustafar? Why would he want to live there?! Here's some explanation from the production team, but personally I like the idea of him living on Coruscant, or any one of the various Star Destroyers or Death Stars. This whole "Darth Vader's permanent home/lair" thing just doesn't feel right. Also, is Darth Vader creating one ring to rule them all?
"Be careful not to choke on your aspirations" - Haha. Darth Vader's got jokes. No. Darth Vader does not have jokes. Maybe Anakin had jokes. But Darth Vader does not have jokes. Remember this? Look at that Darth Vader. Does that look like a guy that has a sense of humor? No. I don't care how comfortable that suit is, and how much it helps with pain relief, Darth Vader does not have jokes. The next funniest thing he says is when he kills Captain Needa and says "apology accepted." But, that's funny to us, but not meant to be funny. This is meant to be funny. Unless of course he's so ignorant to humor that he doesn't know he's being funny. But I don't see how that's possible. He's Force choking a guy and telling him not to choke on his aspirations. Sure, it's funny, but it's too out of character to land with me.
R2-D2 and C-3PO cameo - C-3PO asks R2 why no one tells him anything. Dude, you're a protocol droid. You're a glorified servant and this whole "going to Scarif" thing literally happened in the last two minutes. You're probably not high on the priority list for the Rebel Alliance of people to tell. I'm perfectly okay with having R2-D2 and C-3PO making an appearance in this movie, but if you're going to do it, do it right. This was just a "oh hey, remember these guys?" It was in the Stan Lee school of cameos (which I love), you do it because you have to. At least with Stan Lee's, some of them actually fit into the movie and help tell the part of the story as opposed to just being an "oh look, Stan Lee" moment. In the case of R2 and 3PO, here's two ways I would have done it that would have felt more natural. 1) Same scene, but change the dialogue. Instead, show both of them walking through the Rebel base with C-3PO saying something like "hurry up R2, they're going to take off without us." or 2) the end scene where the rebel soldiers hand the Death Star plans over to Princess Leia, have C-3PO and R2 roaming the halls and not saying anything. They're famous enough in appearance that everyone knows who they are. The first option, I think is better because it doesn't change the end scene which was all about the Vader badassery, and the Leia reveal. Here's why this is better than the scene as it is in the movie. It feels less forced, and if the Tantive IV is in the Battle of Scarif then so too are R2-D2 and C-3PO which means that if they're standing around in the Rebel Base questioning why everyone is going to Scarif, they're not getting on the ship to be where they need to be by the start of "A New Hope."
Episode IV: A New Hope
R2-D2 reunites with C-3PO - Maybe I don't have proper perspective to feel underwhelmed by this scene. But, here you have, really, the only two characters we've seen much of so far in this movie separated and reunited within ten minutes. To me, there was never any doubt that these two would be reconnected after going opposite directions on Tatooine, so to have C-3PO freak out with joy that "oh R2-D2 it is you! It is you!" just seems a little forced. Perhaps, if I were in the theaters in 1977 I would feel a little more sense of joy that these two apparent close companions are so relieved to be back together again because I, as a viewer, was genuinely concerned at how poorly they parted ways. But, I doubt it because at this point I'd probably still be trying to wrap my head around that opening scene and what exactly I'm watching.
Jabba confronts Han - Is this scene unnecessary? Yes. Do I hate it as much as I know I should? No. It does it's part as far as adding a little more urgency to Han's desire to get money to pay Jabba back and get the bounty off his head, which ultimately doesn't really happen and leads to his being frozen in carbonite. However, this scene doesn't work with the movie itself for multiple reasons. The first, the bad CGI. The second, the repetition of dialogue. How many times does Han need to say "look, even I get boarded sometimes," in the same movie just minutes apart. Three, Greedo's in the background. Greedo's dead. Unless that's another Rhodian bounty hunter that happens to be dressed in Greedo's clothes. Four, gratuitous Boba Fett shot that does nothing but get fans giddy. Five, Jabba the Hutt was supposed to be a human when this scene was shot. Which makes Han's line of "Jabba you're a wonderful human being," seem like a legitimate line and not an awkward attempt at a joke. But, once you realize this, you can't help but see how awful the edit job is of making Han step up and on Jabba's tail, making him squeal, in the version in the movie. I appreciate what this scene is trying to do, but remember what Yoda said.
Luke and Leia mad at Han over money - Luke and Han (and Chewie (give him a medal damnit)) just successfully rescued Princess Leia and returned her to the Rebellion. Han gets his reward and is packing up to leave.... LIKE HE SAID HE WOULD. Luke gets all mad and whiny at him "where are you going? Why aren't you staying?! Wahhhh." The man has a bounty on his head. You know this. Leia knows this. Everyone knows this. Why is it a surprise that he's using the cash he earned to pay that off.... LIKE HE SAID HE WOULD?! Besides, yea, you've been through a lot in a short period of time, but you still don't really even know this guy. You've been acquaintances for, what, three days? He's a contracted pilot. He fulfilled that contract and then some and now he's going about his business. The General at Hoth's Echo Base understood this, why can't Luke?! I mean, I get it. Han Solo is a hero of the film and he's bailing when the goings getting tough. I'd rather him have his change of heart and stay for the Death Star fight because it's a higher calling, a greater good, whatever you want to call it. But, I can't fault the guy because he's doing exactly what he said he would do all along. Luckily for all involved, he had a change of heart and came back when it mattered most because "I knew there was more to you than money."
Episode V: Empire Strikes Back
Han and Leia's early romance - Where did this come from?! Watching "A New Hope" you can't help but notice that Han thinks Leia's attractive. After all, he asked Luke if he thought "I guy like me and a girl like her..." "No," Luke responds before Han can finish the question. It's also apparent that Luke likes Leia too. At the time, I thought Luke and Leia made a better couple too (I know, right?!) So, when Empire starts and all of a sudden there's this whole sexual tension thing between Leia and Han it's kind of out of nowhere. There's three years of stories between these two movies and obviously a lot that has happened since then between these characters. But we don't see any of that, nor do we find out what any of that is. It ends up being one of the best and most famous love stories in science fiction, if not all of cinema, but still, it snuck up on me, and that's why I'm putting it in the section of "well, it tried."
Leia kisses Luke - As I just mentioned, I always thought Luke and Leia would have made a better couple than Han and Leia. So, I was perfectly okay with this scene. Had that been the end of it, I probably would have had it in the "best moments" list. But then we find out that... well.... But here's the thing, it's really not a seen about Luke and Leia, it's a scene about Leia and Han. Han's being, well, Han and Leia, in an effort to make him jealous, decides to kiss another guy right in front of him, Unfortunately the only other guy in the room (not metal or covered in fur) is her brother. Not that she knows that, even though, as she says in "Return of the Jedi," "I've always known," (which just adds another whole layer of confusion). Luke's reaction is priceless too, the cocky smug "oh yea, I got some" look. A).... B) You didn't do anything to deserve feeling cocky. Your kiss with Leia was a product of circumstance. She only kissed you because Han was being a jerk and she wanted to prove a point. Get over yourself, you just made out with your sister. I hope you get mono! (But the bacta tank will cure that).
Han and Leia kiss - This is a great scene. Should probably be in the best moments list. 1) I'm too lazy to go back and add it in there and 2) I trust my guy to put it here for a few reasons. Everything we know about Han leads me to believe that when Leia, in all seriousness, asks him to stop calling her "your worship," he would come back with some kind of "oh relax" or "I'm just kidding" or some snide remark. Instead he just gives up and is all like "sure, Leia," like this is the first time he's calling her by her name. It just feels weird. Then the whole, "don't touch me my hands are dirty" and "I happen to like nice men" are funny lines, but still just seem awkward. I know it's probably meant to, first kisses and the moments leading up to them often are, but for a first kiss as legendary as this, I expected less awkward. As I said, this whole Han and Leia thing being a legitimate romance kind of took me by surprise. Then again, I was eight. Also, the old tired movie cliche of a romantic moment being interrupted by a character that doesn't know better. Ha ha. Then, Leia just slinks off away from Han without saying anything because... regret? I don't get it. If you're looking for a good laugh, go to YouTube and search for this scene, there's some pretty creative results. I'm not going to link the search though, because you may get too caught up in that and not come back to my ramblings.
Lando's Greeting - I enjoy this scene. You know nothing about Lando other than that he's an old acquaintance of Han's and has no love for the Empire. That's it. Then they show up on Cloud City, almost get shot out of the sky, and Lando meets them on the landing platform and plays this whole game of "you shouldn't have come here, jerks! Just kidding! Nice to see you." Did anyone really think that our heroes were in trouble? I didn't. Nice try.
Episode VI: Return of the Jedi
Chewbacca falls for the Ewok trap - From our human point-of-view Chewbacca is an animal, right? I mean, he growls and roars and he's covered in fur. But, he's not really an animal, in his action and personality he's more person than animal. Yet, here we are making a joke about him always thinking with his stomach and falling for the old "meat stuck on a rope" trick that gets him and everyone else caught in the Ewok's net. I'm not saying it's not funny. I chuckle a little bit every time, I just think it's unfair to him as a character to all of a sudden make him an animal. Nice try.
Luke and Leia talk family - I'll blame the clunky writing for parts of this scene. It's an epic scene that reveals to Leia what everyone else already knows, that they're related. At the time this scene was weird because you had that look of realization on Leia's face that she
Palpatine makes Luke watch the Death Star space battle - The whole scene with Palpatine talking to Luke is awkward. Perhaps George Lucas hadn't come up with the Sith Rule of Two yet, but Palpatine is sitting there telling Luke to join the Dark Side and become his apprentice, and doing that right in front of his current apprentice. So following the Sith Rule of Two, Luke would have to kill the Emperor or Vader in order to truly join the Dark Side. If Luke is to become Palpatine's new apprentice, how is Vader supposed to just stand there and be like "yea, ok, that's cool?" Given what we know about Palpatine, he's not going down quietly either. His whole "strike me down," is just taunting. But, here's where this scene falls short from me, and it's all basic production stuff. When we see the scenes involving the space battle, the ships are all spread out and the Rebel ships are trapped between the Death Star and the Imperial Fleet, yet, in the window, the two sides are left and right not front and back. Also, in the space battle all of the ships are much closer to the Death Star but in the window they're miles away. That might be a perspective thing, but then again, a Star Destroyer crashed into the Death Star. That's not happening from miles away. Finally, none of the ships move in the window. None. There's a line or two that moves to make it look like a ship going down, and there's blinking that represents explosions, but none of the ships move. So, don't try to play up the cruelty of Palpatine making Luke watch his friends die when a) his friends are down on the moon, and b) he's clearly not watching the same battle that we are.
Han's perceived love triangle - Harrison Ford is amazing in this scene. The way he's able to communicate so many different emotions in just facial expressions is incredible. But this scene is written specifically to get that moment of "aha" from Han. Han reassures Leia that Luke's ok, Leia using her new found Force powers (that she's had zero training on how to use) can sense that Luke is alive. Han calls attention to the fact that Leia loves Luke, which she acknowledges but doesn't immediately say "of course I do, he's my brother." No, we need to drag it on a little longer and have Han be "the good guy" that's going to stay out of the way. First off, no, Han wouldn't do that no matter how much he's changed. Second, we all know that Leia loves Han and that Luke and Leia are related, so this just makes Han look stupid, which isn't cool either. Then you have that fantastic slew of facial expressions when Leia tells Han that she and Luke are siblings and he realizes that she
Episode VII: The Force Awakens
Supreme Leader Snoke - I'm not here to guess who Snoke really is, whether that's Palpatine or Vader or Obi-Wan or etc etc etc. That will all be answered either soon, or in a few years. But, here's why Snoke didn't really do much for me. I don't care about him. I don't know anything about him. Hell, I don't really even know what the First Order is. Because they're the new bad guys in the wake of the Empire, I kind of assumed they were in charge, but then you have everyone talking about the Republic. So, the First Order is really the new Rebellion (by definition not ideology). So, Snoke is like General Nadine or Mon Mothma, the leader of the group seeking to bring down the establishment. But a) what is he? A disfigured man or some kind of alien race that just looks that way b) who is he? Other than Kylo Ren's mentor and, by title, the Supreme Leader of the First Order, we don't know. c) where is he? No clue. I will admit, I honestly thought he was just a huge giant being that we've never seen before, because apparently hologram technology has come a long, long way in the time since we last saw it in the original trilogy, because Snoke looked like he was actually in that room in front of Kylo Ren and Hux. Then the hologram shut off and he disappeared and yea, I was momentarily impressed. But threw all of this, where is he? Don't you think he could have been some kind of help to stop the Resistance from destroying Starkiller Base. I guess the same could be said about the Emperor and the first Death Star, but at that point the Emperor had only been referenced and not actually appeared on screen. I can only imagine that my opinion of Snoke and his inclusion in this movie will change once "The Last Jedi" comes out.
Kylo Ren revealed to be Han Solo's son - Here's back to back try hard moments in the same scene. Can you believe it? Here's why this didn't work for me. Like I said about Vader not really being Luke's father if Vader killed Anakin, Kylo Ren later when talking to Han straight up says Ben Solo was weak so "I destroyed him." So, if Ben Solo no longer exists, then Han can't be Kylo Ren's father (aside from the whole DNA test thing (which probably doesn't exist in the Star Wars galaxy)). But I didn't like that it was Snoke that came out and revealed this relationship. Aside from the whole "normal people don't talk like this argument," I think the reveal would have meant more if it was left to Han and Leia's conversation about "I saw our son." Then it's more powerful. It's put in the hands of two characters we know and love, and two characters who are strongly affected by this revelation. That's all.
Maz Kanata's Cantina Scene - So let's see, you have an orphan on a desert planet that flies away on the Millennium Falcon, you have the Dark Side bad guys and the Light Side good guys and the good guys trying to destroy a version of the Death Star, you have two male heroes and one female hero, you have a bad guy in a mask, and you have a mentor to the young heroes that dies by way of lightsaber. This movie, as much as I love it, is "A New Hope." So, do we really need to recreate the Mos Eisley Cantina scene too? No, no we do not.
C-3PO interrupts Han and Leia's reunion - We're about to get the long awaited reunion of Han and Leia after how many years? But no, first we have to sit through a funny scene involving the ever oblivious C-3PO. You know, for a droid that claims to be programmed to understand human emotion, he's really bad at human-ing. As I said earlier, I like this character, but God can he be annoying. This is one of those times. It's supposed to be funny, and maybe the first time you see it, it is. But after that first time, no. Not so much. And yes, 3PO, Han knew who you were even with your new red arm.
BB-8 finds R2-D2 - If you keep watching the scene I linked to just above, you'll see this scene too. It's supposed to be a dramatic reveal of "oh look R2" but it falls flat when C-3PO explains that he just shut down when Luke left and "I don't know if he'll ever be the same." This makes no sense. If Luke told R2 to shut down because he's leaving, how does R2 know when to wake up at the end of the movie (which is another scene that I wrote down in my notes to include in this section here to save time, like that's an issue)? There are all sorts of theories that are just that, fan theories. I'll wait to see if they explain it in the next few movies before I start believing other people's guesses. But R2's role in this whole movie is confusing. "Stand there and collect dust because I'm hiding this map in you, but only wake up and show it when it becomes both convenient to the plot and necessary to wrap up this movie," is what I believe Luke told R2 before leaving for Lonely Island (the name I believe belongs to the planet he's on. His neighbor is Andy Samberg). It just seems like a forced way to get R2 in the movie and be relevant and leaves more questions than it helps answers. As long as those questions are answered in the next movie or two, I'll change my mind. Until then....
Kylo Ren's almost turn back to the light - I'll admit, I thought he was going to break. He's standing on a bridge, helmet off, talking to his dad, and on the verge of tears. He's talking about how he's conflicted and in so much pain and asks his dad for help, and goes to hand over his lightsaber. But come on... really? Did you really think the main bad guy would turn to a good guy in the first movie?! No, and neither did I. Part of me wanted to think he might, because that'd be a ballsy move for J.J. Abrams, but that same part of me would have been the most upset because, like killing Darth Maul in his first movie, you can't have your main bad guy turn to a good guy in the first movie of the trilogy and have us fear him and be impressed by his power, because then he's just weak and lacks conviction. We don't know him well enough for his redemption to matter.
So there you go, another section down. We're cruising at... not quite lightspeed. If you need a break, now's the time. But hurry back because we've still got so much ground to cover. Luckily (for you and maybe my keyboard) this next section won't need every point dissected nearly as much. It's just straight up for the laughs.
Despite it's, at times, dark nature and it's serious religious undertones, Star Wars movies are funny. Sometimes the jokes fall kind of flat. Other times they resort to cheap slapstick humor. Sometimes the jokes are cleverly crafted, and even those moments that are purely physical comedy are worth a chuckle. So, get ready to giggle....
Laugh it up, Fuzzball - The funniest moments of the Star Wars saga
Again, there's really no way to rank these moments from least funny to most funny, because even the least funny is worth a chuckle, and there's no "best funny moment" that makes me literally roll on the floor laughing. So, I'll once again go chronologically.
Episode I: The Phantom Menace
Boss Nass Cheek Shake - I would love to sit in Gungan legislative meetings if this is how all decisions were made final
There's always a bigger fish - Get it? Because twice they were saved from the scary monster fish by an even bigger fish? But, can there really always be a bigger fish? Eventually you're going to run out of water to accommodate the bigger, biggest fish. Also, is this an allegory for Darth Sidious being a bigger fish to Darth Maul? Also, also, Ewan McGregor was later in Big Fish. HAHA!
Droid legs walking - Not sure how this works, since the whole "chicken with it's head cut off" I would think only works with organic beings, but then look at Grievous's magnaguards. Anyway, there's a pair of battle droid legs walking on their own for two steps. It's funny. I was ten when this movie came out, cut me some slack.
Jar Jar steps in poop - Since I don't want to make you sit through a ten minute video of the "best or worst of Jar Jar," here's a kid laughing at Jar Jar stepping in poop, which is really all you need to know.
Watto Jedi Mind Trick - First of all, if there's a whole race of beings that aren't susceptible to Jedi mind tricks, wouldn't you think Qui-Gon would know this? Instead he just gives it another shot like "wait, is my Force broken?" But I love Watto's reaction where he just openly mocks Qui-Gon for trying to be a Jedi. HAHA.
C-3PO is naked - It's funny that he thinks the ground isn't stable because he has no outer casings which help in support, but then R2's just like "dude, you're naked." Haha. Naked jokes. Juvenile humor. Classic.
Jar Jar's tongue goes numb - I'm sorry, I don't hate Jar Jar as much as I should. But again, I was ten going on eleven, stupid humor still worked on me. Usually still does. So, after Anakin tells Jar Jar to be careful because your hand will go numb for hours, Jar Jar goes and sticks his head in there. "I mean, he didn't say anything about my tongue!" But fortunately for you, I'm still too nice to make you sit a full Jar Jar montage, and there's no clip of this scene.
Poodoo - Contrary to what this video says, this is the Star Wars word for poop or fodder, and it's just giggle-worthy the few times it's said.
Jabba's boredom during Podrace - Again, I can't find a clip exactly of what I want, so oh well. But I think it's funny that they shoehorned Jabba into this movie and he was disinterested at best with the race he was lording over. He's sitting there flicking his live snack frog things off the ledge and then falls asleep. Keep in mind that they didn't even race the whole race, it's just that Anakin was the last man standing, so why bother racing the last lap?!
"Why do I sense we've picked up another pathetic lifeform?" - Not only is Obi-Wan calling Anakin, his future padawan, a pathetic lifeform, but he's also expressing his true feelings for Jar Jar. To take matters further, he's also kind of calling the queen and her entourage pathetic lifeforms too, because they kind of picked them up along the way as well. Funny, but also not really in Obi-Wan's character past the end of this movie.
"It's ouch time" - I'm not apologizing for thinking, on some level, that gungans are funny. Sure, Jar Jar gets annoying, but this is Captain Tarpals, and he's talking just the way he normally talks. And this is funny because he knows he might die, but it's the most lighthearted way of saying "oh shit (or poodoo)!"
Jar Jar's luck in battle - What that video doesn't show is when Jar Jar gets his foot tangled on the wires of the battle droid and manages to shoot down other battle droids by being a coward and trying to hide. Nothing Jar Jar does here is right, but it's effective and that makes it funny. He's kinda like Forrest Gump in that he does the right thing without really trying to or really meaning to. And now I'll go shame myself in the corner for that comparison.
Episode II: Attack of the Clones
Obi-Wan's Jedi mullet - I'm making this a funny moment because of the bonus features on "Revenge of the Sith." There's a behind the scenes moment where Ewan McGregor sees Hayden Christensen on set for the first time and he's all celebratory because Hayden has to have the Jedi Knight mullet now and he can have normal Jedi Master hair. He's so happy and complains about his hair in "Attack of the Clones" and now I can't watch this without thinking of that moment.
"How many times have I told you, stay away from power couplings" - There actually is a lot of witty banter in this scene. Probably too much for what the moment is, but whatever. This cracks me up though, because how often are they in a ship or speeder and Anakin drives through power couplings? What a jerk! That can't be good for your health. And he's just there laughing.
"You wanna buy some death sticks?" - I love how casually Obi-Wan can Jedi mind trick someone. He doesn't even look up or look at the guy and stays focused on finding Zam Wessel. Also, the guy that gets Jedi mind tricked, it's like he knows what's happening and yet has no idea. Like "no, you're right, I don't want to sell you these so I'll put them away. I'll just take a drink instead. Nope, don't want to do that either. I'm going to leave." Ha.
Dexter Jettster pulls up his pants - Stupid teenage butt crack humor. But seriously, if you had four arms, imagine all you could do, and this guy just pulls up his pants while hugging a friend.
"Lost a planet Master Obi-Wan has" - I know that Yoda is using Obi-Wan's conundrum as a teaching lesson for the younglings, but in the meantime, he's making fun of him for something that isn't his fault. Anytime the kids get a chuckle, it's funny. Also, in a galaxy full of ridiculous names, how does a Jedi youngling get an Earth name like Liam?
"Scramble Code 5 to Coruscant care of the Old Folks Home" - Seriously, that's the line. I finally watched this scene with closed captioning and this is the line. I looked it up and apparently "Old Folks Home" is a code name for the Jedi Temple for the purpose of not having messages intercepted, which just opens up so many hilarious questions.
"Oh, not good" - Jango wraps Obi-Wan up in his wrist cable and tumbles off the edge of the platform and Obi-Wan has this Wile E. Coyote like moment where he knows something bad is going to happen and has just enough time to say something before he gets pulled off the platform.
"Dellow Fellegates" - Remember when Jar Jar proposes the vote to give Palpatine emergency powers? Listen closely as Mace Windu walks in, and Jar Jar addresses the Senate as "dellow felegates." Haha. Gungans talk funny.
Aggressive negotiations - This actually is a cute moment between Anakin and Padme, the call back of diplomacy vs aggressive negotiations, or "negotiations with a lightsaber." I don't know, I chuckle a little bit.
Obi-Wan: "Good Job" - I keep talking about how Obi-Wan's character isn't one that is prone to jokes. Yet, here we are again. Obi-Wan, cuffed to a pillar sees his would-be rescuers joining him on the execution battlefield. When Anakin says "we're here to rescue you" Obi-Wan looks up and notices his state of still being held captive and says "good job" before eye rolling the biggest eye roll ever. It's pretty funny.
"She seems to be on top of things" - Like the C-3PO jokes that come soon after this "this is such a drag" and "I'm beside myself" it's a case of being too literal to be funny. Unlike C-3PO, Obi-Wan has better comedic delivery. He's not trying to be funny, he's trying to point of that Padme is ahead of them on the whole "escape plan" thing. But, because she's literally on top of the pillar, it's accidentally funny. Clarification, it's accidentally funny in the story, but definitely a case of George Lucas trying to be funny in the writing of the script.
Episode III: Revenge of the Sith
"Hands up Jedi" - In an effort to rescue the Chancellor, Obi-Wan and Anakin come face-to-face with a small group of battle droids who tell them to put their hands up. Yea, like that's going to work. Dorks! (Also, not giving credit to the "no loose wire jokes" about R2, because we don't get to hear the loose wire jokes.
R2-D2's oil trick - This is funny because of how awesome it is. But I can't put it as an awesome moment because here's yet another thing that we invented to make R2 cooler in the prequels, but ends up backfiring in the originals because he never again does this.
"We're still flying half a ship" - Again, Obi-Wan probably not trying to be funny, considering the high tension/low survival rate of the moment. But, this is pretty funny. I mean, look, they're trying to land a crashing ship on the planet well below them and half of it falls off. I like Anakin's "we lost something" line too, ummm.... duh!
Wookiee's Tarzan yell - Unlike the re-edited Return of the Jedi to include a Chewbacca Tarzan yell, I actually find this one funny. It's stupid, it's unnecessary, but I find it amusing. Seeing it in the theaters for the first time it made me smile.
"So uncivilized" - Obi-Wan finally kills Grievous who's fatal blow is... a sneeze? He kills him with a blaster because he (temporarily) lost his lightsaber. After climbing back up onto the landing platform, he tosses the blaster aside in disgust with a "so uncivilized" as if he's ashamed to have had to resort to such a weapon. I also love that this ties into Obi-Wan handing Luke his father's lightsaber in "A New Hope" saying that it's "not as clumsy or random as a blaster. An elegant weapon... for a more civilized age." We come full circle.
Obi-Wan passes Grievous's body - After surviving the attack from his clone troopers, Obi-Wan heads back to the landing platform where he killed Grievous because he knew there was a ship there and, what do you know, Grievous's body is still there. I don't know why it's funny, but you would think that given his level of importance, someone would have followed the two of them down to the landing platform while they were battling and have "cleaned up the mess" as it were, despite it only being a few minutes. I love though how he's just unceremoniously lying there like a pile of garbage and Obi-Wan just doesn't care. Also, the only reason Grievous died on that landing platform, instead of somewhere else, is because they needed to show a ship somewhere for Obi-Wan to have an escape route off the planet after Order 66.
Yoda Force slams guards - This makes me both laugh and cheer every time. Here you have the most serious part of the darkest movie of the prequels about to happen: Obi-Wan confronting Anakin/Vader and Yoda confronting Sidious/Emperor. Yoda comes in all business like and as the Imperial Guards go to stop him he's just like "no way dude." Yoda don't take no shit.
"Ooba. Ooba." - I know I shouldn't be laughing from what is otherwise a heartbreaking scene of Natalie Portman, I mean Padme dying. But really? We had to make the midwife robot sound like this? I don't know what "ooba" means, but I'm guessing "push." Imagine going into the delivery room to have your own baby and have the doctor saying "ooba, ooba." Mom would be pissed and dad would be cracking up in hysterics.
"Have the protocol droid's mind wiped" - This is so funny that you can actually see C-3PO's expression change. Obviously it doesn't, but you know what I mean. It's really just an explanation as to why C-3PO has no recollection of Obi-Wan or the name Skywalker in "A New Hope," and a little forced of an explanation because what reason would Bail Organa have to wipe C-3PO's memory and not also R2's? I don't know. Another question for another movie, I guess.
Rogue One
K-2SO clotheslines Jyn - Is there a better way to introduce K-2SO? Jyn's getting rescued by the Rebels, who she doesn't know and when leaving the ship, gets caught, picked up, and slammed to the ground by K-2SO who doesn't even flinch like it took any effort. Definitely worth a chortle.
K-2SO tosses grenade - He's so nonchalant at the most chalantest of times. (Yea, that's a word now). Right after Jyn shoots another droid just like him and freaking out on Jyn that she might not have known it wasn't him, Stormtroopers toss a grenade his way which he catches and just tosses back over his shoulder at the troopers like it's no big deal.
Bagging Chirrut - After getting captured by Saw Guerrera's men, everyone has a bag placed over their head in the old movie cliche of not wanting them to know where they're going. But, they bag the blind man. It's so ridiculous even he calls them out on it. Good stuff.
"Cassian said I had to" - Leave it to droids to not mix words. Jyn and K-2SO clearly have a strained relationship, but there's an emotional moment when, at Jyn's lowest after getting rejected by the Rebel leaders, Cassian and his guys come out in support of her. K-2SO then expresses his support of Jyn and, just as you're about to say "awww" he ruins it with "Cassian said I had to." HAHAHA!
"I can survive in space" - When approaching Scarif, the crew of Rogue One is talking about how, if the Empire doesn't open the shield then they'll all be sucked out into space and die. Ever the sensitive type, K-2SO (the obvious comic relief) says "not me, I can survive in space." What a jerk! I love it!
"I've got a bad feeling..." - One of the best Star Wars in-jokes and they make fun of themselves by cutting K-2SO off in the middle of the line. Lolz.
Star Destroyer crashes Rebel ship - Best link I could find. Sorry about that. Anyway, this is funny because you never expect this to happen. Why do you think everyone always has to punch in coordinates? It's so stuff like this doesn't happen. But bam, out of nowhere this Star Destroyer comes out of hyperspace and crashes into a Rebel ship trying to go into hyperspace. It's one of these kind of moments where the kid in the middle is the Star Destroyer and everyone else is just laughing their heads, yea, heads off at what they just saw.
Episode IV: A New Hope
Darth Vader talks to Leia - I always thought, while epic, this scene was a little funny. One, because of Darth Vader's finger wagging that doesn't seem to go quite with what he's saying, which is a product of the ADR. But what's even funnier about this is, in hindsight, this is the first time that (we see) father and daughter talk to each other, even if they don't know. Also, Vader's impatience with her resiliency and the "ok fine, just get her out of here, we'll deal with you later."
Jawas talking - How is this not funny? All I have to do is say or hear someone say "ooteenee" and it makes me giggle.
R5-D4 dies - So, Owen and Luke are looking for new droids for the moisture farm and the Jawas are selling. I'm not sure why a moisture farm needs and astromech droid, but I'm not a moisture farmer. The only reason why Owen picks R5-D4 is so that he can break down and C-3PO can have that cute moment of "hey, pick my friend." But it's still funny, especially when Luke says "this R2 unit has a bad motivator." What?! Much like Padme dying, a droid needs a motivator? In that case, my motivator is bad every morning when I wake up!
"These blast points, too accurate for sand people. Only Imperial Stormtroopers are so precise" - HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Dr. Evazan and Ponda Baba - Yes, I had to look up their names. Otherwise I'd just go with this. But, it's a great scene. Luke's just trying to mind his own business and out of nowhere these jerks just come up to him to pick a fight. What's great though is that Luke's like, "yea ok" and Dr. Evazan is like no, I'm not done with you yet. Then he gets his arm cut off. Remind me not to talk to the girl at the end of the bar next weekend...
The Holochess scene - First, I think it's funny to see the pieces literally kill the other pieces when the move is made. That's a straight up body slam, John Cena style! But the real laughs come with the whole "let the Wookiee win" exchange. The best part being Chewbacca sitting back and brushing his hair back like "yea, that's right, who's your daddy now droid?"
"Boring Conversation Anyway" - Casual Han is casual. He's like a kid trying to convince his mom that the dog knocked over the priceless antique vase, but the family doesn't have a dog. He does what he can and when he realizes it's not working he just shoots the damn thing. Yea, that'll work. But... if we're being honest with ourselves, it bothers me that when he shoots the console only a small little flame pops up. Shouldn't the whole thing, I don't know, explode?
"Aren't you a little short for a Stormtrooper?" - We've so far gotten the impression that Leia doesn't take any guff from anyone. But, when a Stormtrooper comes into her detention cell, what does she think she'll accomplish by insulting him? Either way, it's kind of funny how she insults him, but Luke's reaction is weird. Like, did he forget that he's wearing Stormtrooper armor? Also, why does Leia automatically know who "Ben" Kenobi is when the message she sent was for "Obi-Wan" and he didn't start using "Ben" until after his exile. If anything she should've said "great kid, you brought the wrong Kenobi." But then again, Luke should've fought harder against the short remark.
Stormtrooper bumps his head - It's something you don't notice until you know to look for it and once you notice it, you can't unsee it. Here's more on the famous, or infamous, gaffe.
"Close the blast doors. Open the blast doors" - Haha, inept Stormtroopers are inept. "Help! Don't let them escape! Wait, you didn't help fast enough! Get out of our way!" That's more or less what happens here. But, bottom line is, we see all sorts of doors closing almost instantly on the Death Star, wouldn't you think the blast doors would be among them?
Porkins - Really? Isn't this a little on the nose? Imagine if Robert Zemeckis had decided to name him Dumbo Gump instead of Forrest (I know the book was written by Winston Groom, but I can't count on everyone knowing that)? You're going to stuff an overweight guy into a cramped X-Wing cockpit and pilots uniform and then add insult to injury and name him Porkins? Why not Smith or Jones or Williams? I mean, it's funny, but only because it's mean.
Episode V: Empire Strikes Back
"I thought they smelled bad... on the outside" - You can't not say this line with the same elongated pause as Harrison Ford. That's what makes this line even funnier than it would be in the first place. So much so that Family Guy hit it spot on.
"Laugh it up Fuzzball"/"Who's scruffy looking?" - This scene is pure Han Solo gold. He's cocky, he's arrogant, he's confident, he's somewhat delusional. Leia calls him "laser brain" and, rightfully so, Chewbacca thinks its funny, so the offended Han insults his friend with some name calling of his own and then defends his honor. To which, Leia calls him a "stuck-up, half-witted, scruffy looking Nerf Herder." And naturally, the only part of that that Han finds offensive is "scruffy looking." I don't know exactly what a Nerf herder is, but I imagine it's something like this. (I also just realized that in my notes I had this also marked down as an iconic moment in the series, but I hope you'll forgive me for saying that this deep in, it's not worth going back and fixing. Yea? Thanks.)
"Someday you're going to be wrong and I hope I'm around to see it" - The witty back-and-forth between Han and Leia continues. But, sorry Leia, Han is the
R2-D2 spit out by swamp monster - R2-D2 is in danger! Just kidding, he's going for an impromptu swim. But wait he really is in danger. Oh wait, he's getting spit out a mile away by the swamp thing. Ha! Although, this was funnier before this scene got Lucased all over.
Luke meets Yoda - First, Yoda talks funny and at first, because it's unexpected, it's humorous. But, you also don't know that he's the Jedi Master Yoda and so you think he's just this crazy little green thing that wreaks havoc on Luke's camp. Then you find out, wait that is Yoda and that just makes it all the more funny. Here he is, a Jedi Grand Master and he's just going nuts on Luke's things. I mean, can you blame him? He probably hasn't talked to a real person since he moved to Dagobah, so of course he'll be a little eccentric. But, it's likely more just of an act to mess with Luke. Mission: Accomplished.
Han hates C-3PO - Droids are machines, not people. So, it's no surprise that many characters don't value droids the way we, as fans, do. But man, does Han really hate C-3PO in "Empire." It's funny for a while, to hear Han tossing insults at him for a while, then it almost gets to be too much. I said almost.
Vader force chokes officers - I won't link this again, but I get a chuckle out of this every time. Darth Vader's revolving door of Imperial Officers. It's like the Empire's hottest new game show "Who wants to disappoint Darth Vader next?"
R2-D2 tiptoes outside Yoda's hut - It's not a big moment, but it's cute and makes me grin. R2, for some reason, gets left outside, the only one of the three that can rust gets left in the rain. What the hell! But he wants to see what's going on, so he goes to the window, which is too high for him, and like a little kid, goes up on his tiptoes. HEHE.
C-3PO's bad luck on Cloud City - Starting with C-3PO getting insulted by another protocol droid, it's funny because I have no idea what "eechutah" means (of if I spelled it right), but 3PO knows and says "how rude." Then, he goes into that room and gets blown apart. HA HA! Then, Chewie tries to put him back together and he starts freaking out about different things, in different languages and Chewie shuts him off like "ok, knock it off." Then, 3PO starts complaining to Chewie that he's not doing a good enough job putting him back together. Why is this so funny? Because 3PO is kind of annoying in this movie and it's entertaining to see him put in such a predicament. Plus, better him than me.
"You know better than to trust a strange computer" - Do droids have to worry about "stranger danger?" It's funnier now than it was back when I first watched it, mostly because of this.
Episode VI: Return of the Jedi
"The Emperor is not as forgiving as I am" - Says the guy that Force choked three officers to death in the previous movie.
Salacious Crumb - Don't know what he is. Don't care. His laugh is ridiculous and makes you giggle, a little bit. Or cringe and wish you were dead. It's a toss up.
Malakili cries over Pateesa's death - Who does what over what? Exactly. This I had to look up, in order to not just write "fat guy cries over rancor's death" (which is how I had it written in my notes). Now you know what I mean? Good. I just find this funny, because here's this gigantic bug-like dinosaur thing trying to eat Luke and he outsmarts it and kills it, and this guy comes out of nowhere crying that it's dead like Luke killed a part of his soul. But, then again, anyone that doesn't feel for Hagrid when Aragog dies is a heartless shrew. So maybe there's a double standard.
Han and Luke talk on skiff - Considering Harrison Ford is such a beloved action hero and currently plays a lot of "mean old man" type characters, he has great comedic timing. His facial expressions and reaction when he says he grew up on Tatooine and he replies "you're gonna die here you know," and then just for the sake of being more of a pessimistic asshole adds, "convenient." Doesn't get much better than that.
Yoda's humble brag - Anyone that has had to watch parents or grandparents age knows that getting old isn't fun. So, I can't imagine what it's been like for Yoda to live to be 900. That's insane! And.... dude looks good. Best part is, he knows it. In your face human Luke!
"I don't know. Fly casual" - Harrison Ford strikes again. File this under the "thanks for nothing" column. Poor Chewie... hey, at least it was good for a laugh. How exactly does one "fly casual?" Also, it's casually. Maybe this is what he meant....
Ewoks worship C-3PO - HAHAHAHA dumb natives! Still though, makes more sense than the Pelogostos worshipping Jack Sparrow. Also, anyone else think that the one Ewok breaks character and speaks English and says "that guy's wise," in reference to what C-3PO says? Here, listen and decide for yourself.
"It's against my programming to impersonate a deity" - Han's frustration combined with Luke holding in laughter kind of says it all. Also made funnier when you picture nine-year-old Anakin programming C-3PO and thinking "hmm... maybe I should put a prohibitor in here that prevents him from pretending to be a god. That could be crucial somewhere down the road."
R2-D2 zaps Ewoks - Here you have the gold droid being revered as a god and the round white and blue one tied up for dinner. As Luke used to note, R2's lucky he doesn't taste very good. Still, Luke's little trick with 3PO fixed the situation and made the Ewoks free everyone, including R2. But he's holding grudges and starts zapping the Ewoks not once, not twice, but several times and chasing them around. It's like the Ewoks who are the big brothers that have their squirt guns and gang up on the little sister (R2), only to have her pull out the big-ass super soaker and send her brothers fleeing.
Han tricks Scout Trooper - Dude... you fell for that?! Come on! Also, given that "Star Wars" takes place "A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away," I think that makes this the oldest trick in the book, no matter what Geico says.
Han realizes Luke and Leia are siblings - Probably more cute than funny, but when Harrison Ford (genius) sells it so well with his facial expressions that it's kind of funny that you can almost physically see the gears turning in his head as he's realizing what exactly it is Leia is telling him. Also, the chance that he's realizing "wait a minute, you made out with your brother!"
Episode VII: The Force Awakens
"To me she's royalty" - You know you're young when you hear "General Organa" and don't think that's weird. It's "Princess Leia," who are we kidding? So, this nice little moment with Lor San Tekka (who?) and Poe talking about Leia, is cute and funny. Poe, the young one, knows her as General Organa, but Lor is all like "ha, that's funny. You're cute. Go do your Resistance things."
"You talk first? I talk first?" - Poe tried to shoot Kylo Ren. It didn't work out the way anyone would have expected, other than the fact that Ren didn't get shot. Poe gets dragged in front of Ren and forced to his knees. There's no reason why Poe shouldn't, ahem, soil himself. Instead, he tells us what kind of character he is: bold, daring, funny. Is it corny? Yes. Does it break the tension? Yes. Is this a scene where the tension needed to be broken? No not really. Does it make me snicker? Yep.
"The garbage will do" - First off, shame on you for calling the Millennium Falcon garbage. How dare you. But hey, it's pretty funny. I mean, if Rey and Finn honestly just thought that the whole "Luke Skywalker, Jedi, Empire" thing was all a myth, why wouldn't they think that an old ship that has been covered up for years is garbage? It hasn't flown in a while. I get it. But, hey, it's the ship that made the Kessel Run in
BB-8's "hammock" - It's pretty funny to see the droid shaped like a ball rolling around because a) he's a ball, b) he has no arms or feet to hold onto anything. I mean, sure, he probably has some kind of magnetic capabilities, but where's the fun in that. Instead, he says, "ugh, this is getting old," and just starts shooting cables out at the wall to suspend himself in a kind of hammock. Good on you BB-8.
BB-8 thumbs up - I don't get the same sense of internal conflict when BB-8 is trying to determined to help Finn lie to Rey, or be truthful with Rey as I do when Darth Vader is debating between siding with his son or with the Emperor. But, it is funny to see BB-8 not sure what to do, then ultimately decide to side with Finn and return the "thumbs up" to him. Not sure why BB-8 has a cigarette lighter, or why he thought that was the closest thing he has to a thumb, but I'm not complaining. It's humorous and adorable. Also, how did thumbs up make it from the Star Wars galaxy to ours? (And why?)
Millennium Falcon made the Kessel Run in 14 parsecs - Han's favorite bragging point of the Falcon is that it made the Kessel Run in 12 parsecs. Rey remembers it as 14 parsecs. Excuse me! That's two more parsecs! HAHA! The look of offense on Han's face is priceless. Side note, parsecs are a unit of distance, not time. So, many think this means it's like Han bragging about running a marathon in less than 26.2 miles. But, fun fact, in writing of this article, I have discovered the truth behind this almost-mistake. In case you don't want to read that, it basically says that the Kessel Run is a smugglers route, and Han could do it in less distance through hyperspace because the Millennium Falcon could take a straighter more hazardous route through hyperspace without failing as other ships would. So, yes, he did do it in shorter distances (and likely less time) than anyone else. Maybe this is a way of making excuses to justify a mistake made in the original script? Or maybe, George Lucas is a secret science genius? Hmm......
"Yes I do. Every time" - What have I been saying all along? Han is more lucky than good. This is proof of that. Han's getting confronted by two groups he owes money or goods to because some things never change. As Rey and Finn go to hide, Han says he's going to talk his way out of it. Chewie, I can only imagine, says something like "I call bullshit on that one," and Han verbally slaps him in the face. Hey Han, if you talk your way out of it every time, mind explaining to me how you got frozen in carbonite for three years?
"Women always figure out the truth" - Is that why you and Leia split? Oh, too soon? Han knows Finn is lying about, well, everything. Somehow Rey doesn't... yet. Not sure what that says about her, but that's not the point. It's funny to see suave, ladies-man Han saying giving this much credit to women. I'm not saying they don't deserve the credit, by any means. But it's just a little humor to throw in there to make Finn feel guilty for lying.
Han likes Chewie's bowcaster - Han shoots a Stormtrooper and blows him up with Chewie's bowcaster and upon handing it back to his long time friend and sidekick says "I like this thing." That's funny. Only problem is, he used it earlier. I guess that moment was still tense enough that a quick little quip was inappropriate? Or, it took a second use to really solidify his love of the weapon. The only problem here is, in the thirty plus years of smuggling across the galaxy Han has never before used Chewie's bowcaster? I find that hard to believe.
Troopers walk away from Kylo Ren's tantrum - I've already mentioned this earlier in the "worst moments" section. (Can you remember back that far?) But while the tantrum is off-putting, the troopers walking away and avoiding the mess is definitely hilarious.
Finn worked sanitation - So, we know that Finn turned from the First Order. We know that on his first mission he froze. We don't really know if the mission to Jakku was his first, but we're led to assume that. But then we find out, after the Resistance puts their faith in his knowledge of Starkiller Base, that he used to work sanitation. So, the fate of the galaxy relies in the hands of a janitor. Great. Funny, but greaaaaat. Also, what's the promotion process for Stormtroopers? How easily can you go from being a janitor to a mission ready soldier? I mean, if they're taken from their families at a young age wouldn't you think they'd be trained for one thing and one thing only, and not really have any say in the matter?
"That's not how the Force works" - Maybe Finn meant to say "we'll use force," like of the brute variety. I mean, they did bring blasters... and a Wookiee. But it's funny that in the matter of a few hours or days, depending on your perception of the timeframe of them movie, Finn went from knowing nothing about the Force to... well... knowing nothing, but thinking he knows everything. Han, not by any stretch of the imagination a Force expert, corrects him like a parent corrects their son when he's being an idiot (been there... on the son end...)
HAHAHAHAHA. I'm still laughing. I hope you are too. Okay, I'm lol'ing like the kids lol when they're not really lol'ing. But enough fun and frivolity, because if you've lasted this long you're braver than volunteering to dive head first into the Sarlacc Pit. But I appreciate your loyalty.
Now, let's move on to the Easter Eggs section of the saga.
Those analysis droids only focus on symbols: Easter Eggs in the Star Wars saga
For those that aren't aware, an Easter Egg is a hidden element in the movie either as a reference to another movie or as in inside joke. Most, if not all movies have an Easter Egg or several. I'll admit that I'm not the best at finding Easter Eggs, except for the blatantly obvious ones. Either I'm not versed enough in the wider universe (like the Marvel Cinematic Universe and comic books) or, I'm too focused on the action in the movie to notice the out of focus-maybe important sign of the business in the background. But, after watching the "Star Wars" movies so many times, and taking notes, there are more and more things I notice that are Easter Egg in nature. Here they are:
Episode I: The Phantom Menace
"You'll never get me on one of those dreadful starships" - It's maybe not really an Easter Egg, but it's kind of an ironic foreshadowing and inside joke, but that to me makes it an Easter Egg. When C-3PO and R2-D2 recant R2's adventures in space, C-3PO says he'll never get involved in that. Little does he know.....
"No one can kill a Jedi" - says the kid that will grow up to kill all of the Jedi.....
Aurra Sing - Blink and you miss it. The bounty hunter, who plays a much bigger role in "The Clone Wars" makes her first appearance on a ridge overlooking the Boonta Eve podrace. Was she put in here because they had a story to tell about her in "The Clone Wars?" Was she added into this scene after appearing the "The Clone Wars?" Did they make her an important character in "The Clone Wars" because she happened to be in this scene? I know the answer to none of those questions.
Tusken Raiders - Sure, they actually play a role in the movie, in shooting down pod racers (and we have to walk through metal detectors and get nail files taken away at baseball games) but, if we're being honest with ourselves, this scene loses nothing without them. Thus, Easter Egg.
Jawas - The only defense for putting Jawas in this scene is to remind you where you are, in case you forgot you were on Tatooine. Therefore, Easter Egg.
E.T. - Did you know that E.T. officially has a race? I didn't. I wish I still didn't. Kinda ruins the magic of the movie "E.T." no? Anyway, I think this is a cool George Lucas nod to his friend Steven Spielberg. But it opens up so many questions, starting with but not limited to, "what was going through E.T.'s head when he saw the kid dressed as Yoda on Halloween?"
Wookiees - (Sorry for the terrible picture) We don't really know much about Wookiees except for what we know about Chewbacca, which is still very little. So, I'm going to count it as an Easter Egg to see a Wookiee delegation in the Senate during "Episode I." Until now, I wouldn't have thought that Wookiees were considered intelligent enough creatures to have a voice in intergalactic government. Maybe we should start electing animals to our own Congress. How about starting with a turtle?
Chancellor watching Anakin's career with great interest - Get it? Because Palpatine is Sidious and Anakin is Vader! OH MY GOD! It was right under everyone's noses the whole time. Honestly though, did Palpatine know that Anakin would become his star apprentice in this moment? I want to say no, but if I say yes then I'm all the more impressed with his powers and ability to manipulate literally everything.
Episode II: Attack of the Clones
"The Chancellor doesn't appear to be corrupt" - Epic foreshadowing! Get it? Because the Chancellor is actually a Sith Lord. Spoiler alert, the guy that doesn't think he's corrupt also becomes a Sith Lord.
Obi-Wan predicts his death - I mean, they just got done with a death defying speeder chase through Coruscant night life traffic. (Talk about a city that never sleeps!) But, what he's really doing is
Dooku statue in Jedi archives - Can you Easter Egg the movie that you're in? When Obi-Wan is looking for Kamino in the Jedi archives, he spends a portion of time staring at Count Dooku's statue as part of the Lost Twenty. We don't really know who Dooku is at this point in the movie, and we don't get an overly clear look at the statue, or any acknowledgement that it is in fact Dooku (thanks to the scene getting deleted). But, the second time you watch this movie you think "hey! That's Dooku!" And you're right. Also.... does the Lost Twenty become the Lost Twenty-One? And does Ahsoka Tano get a statute?
Anakin and Padme discuss government - This is a cute scene between the soon-to-be spouses. But, it's also an Easter Egg, in that Anakin, still a Jedi, is all but advocating for the creation of the Empire. Then Padme's like "you're going to be the one in charge?" And he's like "no, but someone powerful, like the one I'll call 'boss.'"
Boba Fett - I touched on this earlier, but if we're being honest with ourselves, the only reason that Jango Fett was chosen as the template for the Clone Troopers was so that we could shoehorn some sort of Boba Fett backstory into the movie. Does really add anything to this film? No. Therefore, Easter Egg.
Death Star Plans - Did the Death Star really need to be designed by
Jango hits his head - This is a great, fun, "blink and you miss it" explanation of why the Stormtrooper bumped his head on the doorway of "A New Hope." It's because Jango is clumsy and bumps his own head on things! Oh genetics!
Anakin talks to Jawas near Sandcrawlers - Like including Jawas in the podrace scene, this is really only put their to be like "oh yea, they live on this planet too!" I'm surprised Anakin didn't swing by Jabba's palace as well.
Anakin whines - There's a lot of Easter Eggy stuff here. 1) Anakin promising someday he'll be all powerful. I mean, I know Vader isn't ALL powerful, but he's pretty close. 2) He pledges to be the most powerful Jedi ever. Technically speaking this comes true as he was a Jedi and turned to the Sith, but once a Jedi always a Jedi. Obi-Wan dies, Yoda dies, Anakin is the last Jedi (spoiler alert). 3) Someday he'll stop people from dying. Ironic that this is what makes him turn to the Dark Side, and then he fails to save Padme anyway.
Episode III: Revenge of the Sith
Chewbacca - Like Boba Fett in the previous film, this movie would not have been any different if instead of Chewbacca being featured as a prominent Wookiee it had been anyone of the other thousands of Wookiees. This was really put in only to make people say "aww! Chewie!" It worked.
George Lucas cameo - Didn't see it? Neither did anyone else. That's probably the point. But he's there, standing outside the Chancellor's box at the opera. And he has a whole character backstory.
Harry Potter Theme - Listen closely! Hear it! John Williams pulling one over on us! as Obi-Wan hands Luke to Beru Lars, that sounds an awful lot like "The Arrival of Baby Harry" from "Harry Potter," not coincidentally scored by Williams.
Tarkin and the Death Star - I like this scene from the standpoint of having it showing Darth Vader and Emperor Palpatine "working" together. But, did they have to show the Death Star and a younger Governor Tarkin? No, not really. But they did. So, it's an Easter Egg.
Rogue One
Mon Mothma - Mon Mothma originally didn't pop up until "Return of the Jedi," so now that we know she was a leading member of the Rebellion, where was she during the Death Star briefing during "A New Hope?" Her inclusion in "Rogue One" was welcome, but not exactly necessary, and as a result it raises a lot of other questions.
Bail Organa - Meanwhile, it wasn't really necessary to have Bail Organa in this movie either, other than to tie the two trilogies together. I'm glad they did, because long live Jimmy Smits. But, still... Then, the conversation between Bail Organa and Mon Mothma about his "friend" that can help and that he can trust "her" to deliver the message because he trusts her with his life, and that he's returning to Alderaan. Simply put, this scene is why Jimmy Smits, retroactively isn't in the original trilogy, because he went back to Alderaan and, well... boom. But his "friend the Jedi," obviously Obi-Wan, and the "her that he would trust with his life is clearly Leia. Ironically, his life was in her hands, and he died anyway. To be fair, she gave up the location of a Rebel Base, but not the Rebel Base that the Empire wanted to know about. So, still kind of tragically ironic.
Dr. Evazan and Ponda Baba - Really just there for the "hey look, it's those guys that Obi-Wan killed or maimed in the cantina." Not sure how they escaped Jedha City in time to not get blown up by the Death Star in order to get to the cantina to tell Luke they don't like him. But, whatever.
Non-Holochess - I'm sure Dejarik (the real name for space chess) is a popular game across the galaxy. So, it shouldn't be a surprise that guys are playing it in Saw Guerrera's hideout. BUT, you're telling me that there isn't a small chance that they could be playing Space Checkers or Space Backgammon instead of the chess equivalent we saw on the Millennium Falcon?
T-15 - A pair of Stormtroopers on the beach of Scarif talking about how the T-15 Skyhoppers have been getting phased out ever since the T-16s were introduced. It just so happens that a certain Luke Skywalker used to "T-16 womp rats back home." Interesting...
Red 5 - Everyone knows that Luke's call sign in "A New Hope" was Red 5. But, how did he get it? Was it random? No, turns out that the previous Red 5 was shot down during the Battle of Scarif. Now, call me crazy, but it seems a little insensitive to the memory of unnamed Red 5 to reissue his call sign so soon after his death. If you're not going to retire the call sign, at least wait a little while longer, right? (I know that Lucas probably had no basis for this when he wrote the original, so another case of prequels causing problems and questions - no matter how cool it is).
Episode IV: A New Hope
"We'll be sent to the Spice Mines of Kessel" - C-3PO, not too happy with R2-D2 says as punishment for... whatever, they'll be sent to the Spice Mines of Kessel, which doesn't mean a whole lot at the time, until Han Solo starts talking about making the Kessel Run in 12 parsecs. So, it's not exactly an Easter Egg, but it's something that catches your ear after rewatching the movie a few times.
"Thank the maker" - Upon first viewing, it seems as though C-3PO is thanking God. But, is there a God or gods in the Star Wars Universe? But then the prequels come out, and it can be construed that in reality, C-3PO is thanking Anakin, who made him, as he's sitting in the presence of Anakin's son. So, this is a retroactive Easter Egg, as it were. It wasn't, then new movies happened, and now it is.
Beru tells Owen Luke is too much like his father - Remember when I said that Obi-Wan's whole "point of view" thing was a clever cover up for oversight by Lucas upon deciding that Vader is Luke's dad? I take it back. This line is evidence that that was the plan all along. Owen and Beru know that, at the very least, Anakin had anger issues. Whether or not they knew he became Darth Vader is unknown, but I find it highly unlikely that they were unaware. So, Owen being afraid that Luke is too much like his father is a legitimate concern.
Luke says he's never coming back to Tatooine - Wah wah.... Sorry Luke, you did come back, and you almost died upon coming back (not that there was any doubt that you wouldn't).
Cell Block 1138 - George Lucas loves the number 1138, starting with one his first films "THX-1138." So, is there any doubt that he'd put Leia in Cell Block 1138? Also, if you read that link, I didn't catch the other 1138s in the other movies, so they won't be on this list (I told you I was bad at Easter Eggs).
Episode V: Empire Strikes Back
John Ratzenberger - This movie came out in the midst of "Cheers," and yet he sounds nothing like America's favorite mailman in these scenes. Not sure why, not sure how, but that's him. Even more ironic is that he appears in every Pixar movie and both "Star Wars" and Pixar are now owned by Disney.
Rogue 2 - All Rebel Pilots have call signs, and I envision that one pilots call sign may change depending on the craft their flying. In the case of the rescue of Han Solo and Luke Skywalker on Hoth, the pilot that first made contact is "Rogue 2." But, here's the thing, there's now a "Rogue One" movie. In that movie, when Bodhi Rook is asked for his call sign and answers he makes up "Rogue One" off the top of his head, to which they respond "there is no Rogue One." But, now three-ish years later there's a whole group with Rogue call signs. Did the Rebels just decide that it sounded cool? Or maybe after the success of the Rogue One mission they decided to pay homage to those lost in that mission? Or, did Gareth Edwards (director of "Rogue One") or writers Tony Gilroy and Chris Weitz just not realize that there was a Rogue Two later, chronologically, in the saga? If it's the former, did they "retire" Rogue One in honor of the crew lost or is there still a Rogue One? SO MANY QUESTIONS!
Episode VI: Return of the Jedi
Yoda calls Luke "the last Jedi" - On his death bed, Yoda confirms the biggest debate leading up to Episode VIII, that Luke is "The Last Jedi."
Episode VII: The Force Awakens
Last Jedi spoiler - In case you still aren't sure who "The Last Jedi" is, it was spelled
Rey lives in AT-AT - Okay, so I could also count the downed Star Destroyer and crashed X-Wing from the Battle of Jakku, but that seemed too easy and I already talked about it. So, I'll use this, because you only get a quick look at the full AT-AT and if you somehow miss it, you'd have to know/remember the shape of the feet to realize that this is one.
Kylo Ren references a Clone Army - Clearly
Jedi training remote on Millennium Falcon - "That darn Luke Skywalker, always leaving his stuff where it doesn't belong! I'm not his mother! I shouldn't have to keep cleaning up after him" - Han Solo (probably).
Holochess - Not only did Finn turn on the game, but to take it one step further, it's the exact same game that Chewie and R2-D2 were playing in "A New Hope" and never got to finish. Somehow no one, in the 30+ years between "A New Hope" and "Force Awakens" no one decided to start a new game? It's really cool how they did that, but I'm not buying it. Also, I love Chewie perking up as if to say "oh yea, I was winning that game!"
Banners at Maz Kanata's castle - There are so many flags and nearly all of them are an Easter Egg, not that I can tell you half of them, but I do see Boba Fett's Mythosaur Skull front and center.
Daniel Craig - FN-007 (I have to assume) is the Stormtrooper sent to guard Rey, whom she fools with her new found
Han Solo wants to put Phasma in the Trash Compactor - Could've/should've probably been in the funniest moments section above, but instead we'll count it as an Easter Egg, Han Solo wanting to put another person in Stormtrooper armor down a garbage chute into a trash compactor. Because he knows all too well how that feels.
And there you have it. I know I'm missing plus-or-minus a billion more Easter Eggs across all eight movies, but those were the ones I knew about or noticed. I know of others, but don't have the knowledge or background to understand them, and therefore usually miss them despite knowing they're there. Oh well.
Impossible to see, the future is: Continuity pros and cons in the Star Wars saga
Look, I get it, "Star Wars" has been around for 40 years, and anytime something has been around for that long, not every detail can match up with what has come before it. Just ask those involved with the X-Men series. But still, every time something new comes out it raises further questions to something old. Plus, then you factor into account "The Clone Wars" which feature so many crucial characters to the movies and a lot of things don't make sense. So here we go, again in chronological order, some good and bad things about the chronology of the "Star Wars" films.
Special Note: Tip of the cap to all eight movies starting with an opening shot that includes a ship flying somewhere. I guess with the opening crawl there's really no other way to do it, but even Rogue One kept up this tradition. Bravo.
Episode I: The Phantom Menace
Boss Nass - Boss Nass is the leader of the Gungans in Episode I. He's then seen in Padme's funeral procession in Episode III. But, in "The Clone Wars" Boss Lyonie is in charge of the Gungans. So, why is Boss Nass in Padme's funeral procession if he's no longer in charge? How long of a term does one serve as Gungan Boss? Sure, reading Boss Nass's Wookieepedia page clears some of this up, but again, I shouldn't have to read in depth stuff online to understand such things.
"Now there are two of them" - In reference to the Trade Federation leaders finding out that Darth Sidious has an apprentice, Darth Maul, who will be joining the action. But here's the thing, do the Neimoidians not know that Sidious is a Sith Lord? Do they not know the Sith "Rule of Two?" That's probably likely, but still... "always two there are; no more, no less. A master, and an apprentice."
Discovering Anakin - Is it just a coincidence that the Naboo cruiser carrying two highly skilled Jedi needs to land on Tatooine for repairs? If this one event hadn't happened Anakin would never have been discovered by the Jedi, and I don't need to tell you what the implications of that are. Was it the will of the Force? I'll buy that. Was it part of the plan manipulated by Darth Sidious? Possibly. But, Sidious seemed pretty upset that the Naboo cruiser had made it past the Trade Federation blockade. He's a good actor, but I don't know if he's that good.
Who knows about Padme? - Padme switches in and out of her Queen outfits and into her handmaiden decoy dress without anyone taking notice. I know that's the point, but who knows about it? Obviously Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan don't. Her handmaidens do, because... duh. But does Captain Panaka? Sio Bibble? I would guess that as head of security, Panaka would have to, but still this seems like the fewer that know, the better.
Saesee Tiin's seat on the Jedi Council - I'll go into more debate about the council later, but for now, I'll settle with asking why Saesee Tiin's seat moves? Here he is, in Episode I, sitting next to Ki-Adi Mundi. But here, in Episode III, Obi-Wan is sitting in that position and Tiin is seen in the foreground sitting next to Kit Fisto (who isn't even on the council in Episode I). Why the change? Does Ki Adi Mundi smell? Did Yaddle suddenly disappearing without a trace make in too hard for Tiin to remain on that side of the room? I feel like your position on the Jedi Council is a point of pride, and being that Yoda is (essentially) the one in charge, your proximity to him is an indication of your level. So, does this mean Tiin got demoted a few spots? I know that they sit in the round, like the Knights of Camelot, so that everyone has an equal share, but anyone that comes before the council faces Yoda and Mace Windu, not Yarael Poof and Oppo Rancisis.
Bail Antilles or Bail Organa - The leader of Alderaan that adopts Leia is Bail Organa. There is a Captain Antilles that is ordered to wipe C-3PO's memory and got choked out by Darth Vader. There is also a Wedge Antilles who is a Rebel Pilot and has nothing to do with Alderaan. So who is Bail Antilles? According to Captain Panaka he was one of the senators nominated to succeed Chancellor Valorum, and he represents Alderaan. Now, one would assume this is actually Bail Organa, but he pops up in the next movie. There's really no answer for this when even Wookieepedia can't really figure it out.
Episode II: Attack of the Clones
Who erased Kamino? - We learn from "adorable little Jedi Youngling #2," or so I'm calling him, that Kamino was erased from the archive memory. The why is obvious. But the who is harder to determine. Sifo-Dyas ordered the creation of the Clone Army, but why would he erase the planet from the archive? Does he not want the Republic to discover and use the army? Did Count Dooku erase it? He left the Jedi Order before he turned to the Dark Side and became a Sith Lord, so that seems unlikely. I guess we just have to guess.
Who is Sifo-Dyas? - Now, after watching "The Clone Wars" you get a better understanding of who Sifo-Dyas is and more of his backstory. But, if you don't watch "The Clone Wars" you really have no idea who he is. Even in watching "The Clone Wars" you don't get the full story. Thankfully there's Wookieepedia for all your Sifo-Dyas needs.
Why Jango Fett? - I've covered this already, but was Jango Fett essential to the plan of creating a Clone Army?
Banking Clan allegiance - At the Separatists meeting on Geonosis it's made pretty clear that the Banking Clan is joining the movement. Yet, in "The Clone Wars" there's a whole story arc about how Banking Clan is neutral in order to assure that both sides are getting accurate access to funds. Which all seems backward, but is also grossly inconsistent. Either the banks are Swiss, or they're not.
Qui-Gon communes with the living - When Anakin slaughters the Sand People for, essentially, killing his mom, you can hear Qui-Gon saying "Anakin, Anakin, Noooo!" (I'm not sure why the "Noooo" is so gravelly). This is important because Yoda later tells Obi-Wan that Qui-Gon has learned the path to immortality. The only problem is, in my favorite story arc of "The Clone Wars," Yoda is surprised to learn this despite having heard it here first.
Proposal of Emergency Powers - Jar Jar is responsible for proposing granting emergency powers to Chancellor Palpatine. But they way that happens is Mas Amedda trying to guilt Jar Jar into doing it. When the Chancellor asks "but who would be able to propose such a thing?" Amedda answers "if only Senator Amidala were here." Only problem is, the whole reason Padme protested going into exile was that she wanted to be there to help decide the fate of the Military Creation Act, which she had been fighting. So, would she really be the one that would propose giving powers to the Chancellor who was very open about using those powers to create an army that she doesn't want created? If only Jar Jar was smart enough to realize this.
Darth Tyranus - This isn't so much a continuity error as it is a general question. How does no one know that Count Dooku is Darth Tyranus? Jango mentions that he was recruited by "a man named Tyranus," Darth Sidious calls him "Lord Tyranus," yet Obi-Wan and Anakin don't find out he's Tyranus until season six of "The Clone Wars." I know the Sith deal in deception, but some type of explanation here would be nice. I mean, Dooku is clearly a member of the Lost Twenty, and has a statute erected of him in the archives, but somehow also managed to hide the fact that he's a Sith Lord?
Padme hugs Anakin in front of Obi-Wan and Yoda - After the duel with Count Dooku in the hangar, Padme finally arrives and rushes right to Anakin and hugs him... right in front of Obi-Wan and Yoda. So much for that attachments and relationships forbidden thing, huh? I mean, how did Obi-Wan and Yoda not realize right then and there that there was something else going on between Anakin and Padme. Sure, they had just spent a long time together in exile and then survived the whole Geonosis thing, so clearly they're close, but ummm, hello! Red Flag!
Episode III: Revenge of the Sith
"My powers have doubled since the last time we met, Count" - Anakin's line to Count Dooku in the Throne Room(?) of Grievous's ship, meant to taunt Dooku about his chances during the upcoming duel. But here's the thing, at the time Episode III came out, you're left to assume that the last time Anakin and Dooku met was on Geonosis, and it didn't end too well for Mr. Skywalker. It's plausible that in the three years and several Clone War battles since that meeting that Anakin's powers have doubled. But, then "The Clone Wars" comes along. This battle takes place in the final season of the series, presumably no more than a few weeks from the start of Episode III. So tell me how Anakin's powers are supposed to have doubled in that short period of time. Go on... I'll wait.
Why doesn't R2 use jets ever again? - I touched on this earlier, but you would think that R2-D2 would use his handy gadgets he shows off in the prequels in the original trilogy. Production wise, I get it. They didn't plan on having R2 be able to fly or spray oil when they made the original trilogy. But then they go and give him handy gadgets in the prequels and it makes you question why he didn't use them in the originals? Certainly when he fell off the X-Wing into the Dagobah swamp or fell off Jabba's sail barge and was face down in the sand would have been good times to use the jets and fly off to safety. Maybe the jets were removed? But we're not told that.
"So uncivilized" - Like I talked about earlier, when Obi-Wan kills Grievous with a blaster he tosses it aside in disgust and calls the weapon uncivilized. This is a nice piece of continuity with "A New Hope" when Obi-Wan talks about the civility of the lightsaber.
WHO IS ON THE JEDI COUNCIL?! - I'm typing that all in caps because it really bugs me. Being ten years old, going on eleven, when Episode I came out, I wanted to own everything to do with that movie, which included "The Phantom Menace Scrapbook." To this day I have the names of the Jedi Council members memorized because of that book. So, imagine my confusion three years later when half of the council members are different and another three later they're different again. How do Jedi Masters keep dying so often? Or are they voluntarily leaving the council? Maybe they're getting kicked off? Answers people! To illustrate just how wacky the Jedi Council (and seating positions) is in the waning years of the Republic, here's a handy little infographic (that I didn't make).
Anakin claims there's never been a non-Master on the Council - Perhaps we can give Anakin the benefit of the doubt that he didn't know that this is just flat out wrong. But, movie makers aren't supposed to make these types of errors. Ki-Adi-Mundi was a Jedi Knight and on the Council in Episode I. I actually dug out the scrapbook to prove it:
Darth Plagueis is Anakin's "dad" - Palpatine teaches Anakin about "the tragedy of Darth Plagueis the Wise," and says that he learned how to influence the midichlorians to create life. We don't know if Palpatine/Sidious was the apprentice that killed Plagueis, at least as far as the movies reveal, but I kind of assumed that before I learned it officially online. So, therefore, the timeframe fits Anakin to have been born probably around the time that Palpatine killed Plagueis which either means that Plagueis influenced the midichlorians to create life or his apprentice who he taught everything he knew did. That would mean that Palpatine is Anakin's dad! Oh wow!
Order 66 trigger - At the risk of repeating myself (again), I always found it hard to believe that the clones would turn so quickly on their Jedi leaders. Fortunately though, as I mentioned, "The Clone Wars" cleared up exactly why that happened. I feel sorry for those that didn't watch the show though, because they're left in the dark.
Obi-Wan beard tug - A standing ovation to Ewan McGregor. Bravo, sir! Several times in this movie (more so than Episode II) we see Ewan McGregor tugging on his beard in much the same way that Alec Guinness does in "A New Hope." What attention to detail!
Grievous explains his lightsabers - Yet another issue created by "The Clone Wars." When Obi-Wan confronts Grievous on Utapau, it's supposed to come as a surprise that Grievous knows how to wield not just one, but four lightsabers. He even tells Obi-Wan how he came about said skills. One problem, Obi-Wan and Grievous have had dueled with lightsabers before during the Clone Wars.
Yoda loses his lightsaber - Why doesn't Yoda ever use his lightsaber while training Luke? Because he dropped it in the Senate Chamber while fighting Emperor Palpatine and was unable to retrieve it. I would assume that, because his exile was rushed after this, he was unable to build a new one. I can't imagine there's an abundance of kyber crystals on Dagobah.
Learn to commune with the Force - As I mentioned just a moment ago, Yoda's journey to learn the path to immortality is one of my favorite story arcs in "The Clone Wars." But, in that arc, Yoda is hearing the voice of Qui-Gon and none of the other Jedi Masters believe him, including Obi-Wan. He goes on this long Native American-esque spirit walk to uncover the truth which, ultimately, teaches him the path to immortality. But, bottom line is, the other Jedi still don't believe him and he just kind of brushes it off as "oh nevermind, it was nothing." Then at the end of Episode III, he says that he has training for Obi-Wan, to learn the path to immortality like Qui-Gon did. Obi-Wan then, all of a sudden, is like "OH! OK! Yea! That's cool!" I don't care how hectic the last few months were (or however long it took for "Revenge of the Sith" to play out), I'm not sure I'd forget Yoda's whole "going crazy and hearing voices" thing and just that easily accept that maybe he was right.
Evolution of the troopers' helmets - This really can go across the entire saga, but is perhaps most notable in Episode III. In 2005 we knew what the Stormtrooper helmets looked like during the Empire's reign. We then saw the Clones helmets in Episode II and then three years later we see a hybrid of the two. I thought, and still think, that this is just awesome. The attention to detail to bridge the gap between the two trilogies and show the evolution of armor. Then, to have the First Order Troopers evolve the same basic design one step further is fantastic as well.
Rogue One
Yavin 4 Tower Guy - Who is he? What exactly is his job? You don't know. But he stood out enough in "A New Hope" that they worked him into "Rogue One." Well done. Well done. Perhaps this might come to pass after all.
Dr. Evazan and Ponda Baba - My only complaint, as previously stated, is that we see them in Jedha City maybe fifteen minutes before the city blows up, and somehow they managed to escape the planet in time? Not sure I buy that.
Council to discuss Rebellion - I like that they showed this scene and all the arguing and bickering it includes. In "A New Hope" I was always under the impression that the Rebellion was a well oiled machine and everybody was on the same page as to how best defeat the Empire. This scene proved otherwise. There's some sort of comfort to know that the Rebels are a disheveled bunch or people that happen to share a common goal.
Red Alert Horn - You would think this would be a no-brainer but I noticed it right away that even 39 years after the original movie, the production crew remembered and opted to use the same emergency signal as the original movies. It seems silly, but you definitely would have noticed if they used a different horn.
U-Wing - The attack on the Death Star featured two types of ships, X-Wings and Y-Wings. The Battle of Scarif took place, at most, a few weeks before the Battle of Yavin. So, where were the U-Wings then? Did they all get shot down? I don't remember that being the case? Perhaps they determined that the U-Wing wouldn't have been useful in the Death Star battle? This is the problem that arises when making prequel movies and having cool ideas for new things, you come up with things that aren't in the source material that, in hindsight, would have been helpful.
Blue Squadron - We've seen Red, Gold, and Rogue squadrons in the original trilogy and now all of a sudden we get Blue Squadron. Okay, fine. But, where'd they all go for the attack on the Death Star? Sure, they all got through the Scarif air lock and, presumably, all died in the battle. So, there goes Blue Squadron. But, as we found out with Luke taking over the call sign "Red 5," how is it that the Rebels are okay replacing one member of Red Squadron but not all of Blue Squadron? If it's a numbers thing then sure. You don't yet have enough pilots to replace all of Blue Squadron? Okay. But, by "ROTJ" you'd think that they'd have rounded up enough pilots to do so. If you want to retire the whole Blue Squadron in honor of those lost, then I'd get that too, but that makes me feel bad for the Red 5 that died during "Rogue One."
Hammerhead Corvette - Again, there was never a time in the original trilogy that this could have come in handy? Great idea, great execution, but creates continuity problems....
Technology - The scene in "A New Hope" where the Rebels discuss the Death Star's weakness looked high-tech for 1977 but not so much for modern day. Yet, "Rogue One" used a lot of that same imagery and technology to keep in continuity with the source material. So, I'll give that a touch of applause.
Episode IV: A New Hope
Owen doesn't remember C-3PO - Now there are a lot of reasons why this is plausible. Firstly, C-3PO was a rusty brown color when he left the Lars homestead in "Attack of the Clones" and now he's all gold. Secondly, it's never shown on screen that C-3PO ever introduces himself to Owen. Based on those two facts, there's no reason why Owen should remember him. That, and people don't have the same regard for droids as we do as fans. But, I find it hard to believe that in the moments not shown on screen that Owen didn't learn the droids call letters, but we can't assume that. So, I'll give this half a pass.
Obi-Wan doesn't remember droids - Here's another issue that arises, Obi-Wan spending time in the company of C-3PO and R2-D2. Why doesn't he remember them? To be fair, he only ever says he doesn't remember owning any droids, which is true. R2-D2 was Anakin's (somehow) and C-3PO was Padme's (somehow). It always bothered me, since the prequels came out, that R2-D2 claims to be the property of "an Obi-Wan Kenobi," even though he should remember that this was never the case. Back to Obi-Wan though, he didn't lie about remembering not owning droids, and probably did, in fact, remember them. But, think about how he handled his early teaching of Luke, lying or varying the truth to a high degree. So, perhaps this is just one thing that he deliberately decided to not divulge.
"Haven't gone by the name of Obi-Wan since before you were born" - LIAR! Sorry, but he is lying. Sure, he started going by Ben instead of Obi-Wan in order to keep hidden in exile from the Empire. But, in "Revenge of the Sith," Padme calls him "Obi-Wan" just before she dies, which is after Luke is born. Here's proof. That's Luke in Obi-Wan's hands! Now, moments later when Yoda, Obi-Wan, and Bail Organa are discussing what to do with the twins, Yoda only calls him "Master Kenobi," so, presumably, Padme is the last person to call him "Obi-Wan" before he changed his name to "Ben."
Imperial Senate dissolved - A line that was more or less of the throw away variety in 1977, but after the prequels and their heavy reliance on the Republic Senate, this line now holds new meaning. I like it.
Stormtroopers talking about the T-16 - I sincerely hope these are the same two Stormtroopers from Scarif that were talking about the T-15. But, they probably died, so I can't see that being likely.
Obi-Wan's body disappears - For that matter, so does Yoda's. They both end up as Force ghosts because they've discovered the path to immortality. Qui-Gon was instrumental in teaching them that, but he didn't disappear when he died. That could be explained as easily as "he more or less stumbled upon the path to immortality instead of knowing how to get there in the first place." But here's the other problem, Anakin/Vader doesn't disappear despite becoming a Force ghost as well. Granted, this can also be explained by saying that Luke burned Vader's armor but that Anakin's actual body had disappeared from inside it. After all, Obi-Wan's robes were left behind, although Yoda's weren't... unless they were hiding underneath the blanket when he died. So many issues!
Who fired the guns on the Millennium Falcon? - Han returns to save Luke from Darth Vader just in time to blow up the Death Star. But, who's firing the Falcon's guns? Han is shown sitting in the Falcon with the headset that he wore in the earlier scene when they were getting pursued by TIE Fighters, but all the lights around him are blue, when the lights in the gun turrets are red and yellow. See for yourself. The blue lights are in the cockpit which means that Han is flying the Falcon. But, to my/our knowledge the Falcon has no blaster controls from the cockpit. Now, the logical explanation is that Chewie is manning (or... Wookieeing?) the guns. But, if that's the case then he deserves the god damned medal at the end more than Han does!
Episode V: Empire Strikes Back
AT-ATs blow up on the ground - I touched on this earlier, but it's worth mentioning again. The snow speeders have to use harpoons and tow cables because the armor on the AT-ATs is too thick to be affected by the blasters. Yet, once they're on the ground they blow up quite easily. How? I guess it's because they fire the blasters at the weak spot on the neck, like Anakin told them to do with the Federation ships on Geonosis? But if that's the case, why couldn't they fire on that part while they're walking? Do you see how this is problematic?
Adding Ian McDiarmid into the movie - This is how Emperor Palpatine looks in his hologram with Darth Vader now. This is how he originally looked in 1980 before showing up actually on screen in 1983 looking like this. George Lucas has done a lot of wrong in his retroactive edits to the original trilogy, but this is one that he definitely got right. Also, kudos to casting a 39-year-old McDiarmid to play the much older Emperor in "Return of the Jedi." This alone makes me think that Lucas knew all along that we would be able to make the prequels. If the Emperor is supposed to be in his 70s in "ROTJ" and you cast someone age appropriate, it's unlikely that 20-30 years later that person would be alive, willing, or able to act in three more movies as a younger version of that character. So, to dress up a 39-year-old as an old man, and then 30 years later have him play that same character as a younger version is much easier. Thank God nothing tragic happened to McDiarmid in-between trilogies, right? Long live Ian McDiarmid!
Emperor acts like Anakin is dead - The Emperor refers to Luke as "the son of Anakin Skywalker." At this point in the movie we're still under the impression that Vader killed Anakin. This line from the Emperor reinforces that. Now, I know for all intents and purposes Anakin is dead. But, so is Ben Solo and Supreme Leader Snoke still refers to Han Solo as Kylo Ren's dad. Maybe it's just a different strokes for different folks kind of thing, but it just seems like an intentional misdirection to save the "I am your father" reveal for later and have it make maximum impact. I'm not saying I'm against that, but I also have to point out that it causes issues.
Temeura Morrison re-voicing Boba Fett - Again, I like this change. It keeps up continuity. If Boba Fett is an exact replica of a clone of Jango Fett then his voice should sound exactly like Jango's did, which means that it sounds like Temeura Morrison. Although, I feel bad for Jason Wingreen, the original voice of Boba Fett, who had any evidence of his part in "Star Wars" erased. Oops.
Episode VI: Return of the Jedi
How is Luke going to convert while obeying the Rule of Two? - Like I said earlier, and sorry for repeating myself again. There can only be two Sith Lords at a time, a master and an apprentice. There was Sidious and Maul, then Sidious and Dooku, then Sidious and Vader. So, if Luke turns to the Dark Side then he has to kill either Vader or the Emperor. Neither the Emperor nor Vader want to die, yet they try to make this happen anyway. Although, maybe they each want Luke to turn and become their own apprentice because deep down they don't care about the other? Then again, there was always that time in "The Clone Wars" where Dooku had Asajj Ventress and Savage Opress as his apprentices, in direct violation of the Rule of Two. And also Darth Maul taking on Savage Opress as his apprentice and introducing himself as a Sith Lord. So, in reality, Luke probably could have turned and been like an "honorary Sith" or something like that, since it was Vader that said in "Empire" "he will join us or die."
C-3PO tells Ewoks stories - I don't speak Ewok, so I don't know exactly what C-3PO is telling the Ewoks, but it's a nice little stroll down memory lane for us recapping the previous two films. Luckily though, it doesn't last very long. But it's a cool little touch, I think. Except, one problem, when C-3PO is heading into the oil bath on Tatooine, Luke asks him about some of his adventures, to which Threepio says he's not very good at telling stories. Yea, okay goldenrod!
Luke's lightsaber looks like Obi-Wan's - It was tradition in the Jedi Order for padawans to model their lightsabers after their master's. Anakin didn't though. What a jerk. So, it's only fitting that after losing his father's lightsaber, when Luke built a new one, he made it look like Obi-Wan's.
Episode VII: The Force Awakens
Millennium Falcon's satellite dish - The Millennium Falcon used to have a round satellite dish on top. Then Lando flew it and violated his promise to Han of "not a scratch." So, in order to make note of this in the latest episodic installment, the Falcon has a new, rectangular satellite dish. Hats off to that level of attention to detail.
Stormtroopers recruited like Jedi - It's an interesting parallel to hear Finn talk about how he became a Stormtrooper, like he was taken from his parents at a real young age and trained up to be a Stormtrooper. If you ask me, it almost directly parallels the way the Jedi recruited, discovering Force sensitive beings at birth and take them from their parents. The only difference is the perspective. You want to believe the Jedi parents had a choice in the matter while the Stormtroopers parents do not.
Same red alert signal - Whereas in "Rogue One" it was essential to have the Empire use the same emergency tone, but thirty years after the fact, it would be very likely that the First Order would have, or could have implemented a different horn. But they didn't and I like that.
And there we go. The biggest, most obvious continuity issues in the saga, that stood out to me at least. Luckily for you, that just about wraps up all of my lists of things to talk about. It's been fun, right? Well, at least for me it has. I hope you too have enjoyed this journey (assuming you've lasted this long.
But wait, what's this? There's still things in my notes I haven't talked about?! Ok, fine, I'll give you a feel more random thoughts that come to mind upon watching, probably, my favorite movies. And... lucky you, this part is much more just random ramblings than everything else you've sat through already. But, like you, my focus is starting to waver.
I have a bad feeling about this - Random final thoughts about the Star Wars saga
Am I really to believe that Qui-Gon, Obi-Wan, and Jar Jar took a bongo through the planet core or Naboo to get to Theed? Like the actual core of the planet? I mean, Earth's core is molten on the outer layer, and solid on the inner layer. Plus, they weren't exactly travelling for a long time, and from the "exterior shots" or the planet (from space), it's a pretty big planet. So, to get from Otoh Gunga to Theed they'd have to be travelling much longer and probably have a more durable ship to survive more than just travelling underwater, you know, like Aaron Eckhart did in "The Core."
Some random miscellaneous thoughts about Episode I, it's both awesome and a shame that Darth Maul has so few speaking lines. I mean, think about it, if he is the Phantom Menace then it certainly plays up the "phantom" part to not have a big speaking part. Plus, it really hammers home the impact of the few lines he had. However, in the toy line, each action figure came with a chip that, when placed up against the Jedi comlink (sold separately) would play a few of that character's lines, or in Darth Maul's case, all of his lines. For that I always felt bad for him.
Which also raises the question who exactly is "The Phantom Menace?" It could be Darth Maul. It could be Darth Sidious. It would make more sense for it to be Darth Sidious because he was the one pulling all of the strings from the shadows and manipulating the entire galaxy in order to become Emperor. However, how can it not be Darth Maul after seeing this?
Remember that scene where Qui-Gon explains midichlorians to Anakin, and a thousand Star Wars fans groans can be heard across the galaxy? Remember earlier when Qui-Gon sent Anakin's blood sample to Obi-Wan to get a midichlorian count. Obi-Wan plugs it into the computer on the Naboo cruiser to get said midichlorian count. How is it that the Naboo cruiser can read midichlorian counts? Considering that the only group that concerns itself with midichlorians is the Jedi, I find this really hard to believe.
What exactly is the ticketing policy for seats at the Boonta Eve Classic? Shmi Skywalker is a slave, so she clearly has no or little money. Qui-Gon and Padme are refugees with only Republic credits that are no good on Tatooine. Yet, they get this private skybox tower thing overlooking the whole home stretch and a personal handheld monitor to watch the race when it's out of view of the grandstand. Which also begs the question, where are the cameras and cameramen set up? Anyway... Watto is the one that fronted the entry fee for Anakin to race, and he's stuck in the general audience with his fellow gamblers, while everyone else is in this private suite. Do all of the families and friends of the racers have private boxes?
Another question I have is whatever happened to Yaddle?!?! Seriously though, we don't what species Yoda is, or what planet he comes from, and then all of a sudden there's a female Yoda on the Jedi Council! I know Jedi are forbidden from having relationships, but assuming, as I do, that Yoda is of an endangered species, wouldn't it be imperative that Yoda and Yaddle mate to save the species? Also, imagine the Force power in the offspring of two Jedi masters? Anyway, trying to erase that image from my head, I want to know where Yaddle went, and I'm not buying the Wookieepedia's explanation of "she took a less active role in the Jedi Order." Once a Jedi, always a Jedi, right Anakin?
Jar Jar Binks. He's funny. He's annoying. He's almost unanimously hated by "Star Wars" fans across all galaxies. So how on... Coruscant or Naboo did he become a Republic Representative?! He was under qualified to be "bombad" general, and is most certainly under qualified to be a legislative member of the government. I guess this is a good thing because it more or less takes him out of the narrative of Episodes II and III.
In trying to avoid execution on Geonosis, was Anakin wearing a cup? Because otherwise, this probably hurt a lot. He probably wasn't wearing a cup, which would explain why the offspring he created have a propensity to makeout.
While we're on the topic of destroying things, what was the estimated damage both in infrastructure and loss of life in trying to rescue the Chancellor and doing so by way of crash landing? I mean, first of all, the entire back half of the ship falls to the planet's surface on it's own. Who knows what damage that did? The, the half that Anakin, Obi-Wan, and the Chancellor not only leaves a trail of debris, each piece of which likely caused damage, but then takes out a control tower that could, conceivably, have hundreds of people working in it, and probably costs a few million credits. Just think, if they had let the Chancellor die they would have spared both the population and infrastructure of Coruscant from devastation, and prevented the Empire altogether!
The entire series, but more specifically the prequels, what a tremendous waste of talent. If I told you I had a movie starring Liam Neeson, Natalie Portman, Ewan McGregor, Samuel L. Jackson, Christopher Lee, Harrison Ford, Mark Hamill, Carrie Fisher, Warwick Davis, Alec Guinness, Oscar Isaacs, and the talents of James Earl Jones and Frank Oz, I'd say OSCAR! The first "Star Wars" did win seven Academy Awards, in ten nominations, but all were for smaller production categories, failing to win Best Picture, Script, or Supporting Actor (Alec Guinness). And sure, not all of the above mentioned names are in the same movie. But still, none of the "Star Wars" movies are exactly "Best Picture" material, no matter how much I enjoy them. Not every movie an actor makes can be a "Best Picture" quality film, but still, to have this much star power in a film, and have it be... for lack of a better term.... prequel quality is, in my opinion, a waste of talent.
Speaking of a waster of talent, in the form of a planet. Can I get a movie involving the history of Jedha? The whole Temple of the Whills thing with the statues of the Jedi fallen down to the ground and the temple containing the kyber crystals is all really cool. I know nothing about Jedha other than what's featured in "Rogue One" and I want more.
Why don't ships collide in hyperspace? I mean, I know that that one ship trying to make the jump to light speed collided with the Star Destroyer coming out of hyperspace, but how does this not happen more often. I get that ships don't fly in a straight line while in hyperspace, but from the sounds of things, when Han tells Chewie to punch in the coordinates, it sounds like he "sets it and forgets it." What happens if one ship sets its coordinates and then another ship sets its coordinates a little later and then somewhere along the way those two paths intersect and kaboom?! Seems likely, and tragic, and I'm sure there's an explanation as to why it won't happen. I'll go with autopilot.
Where do the waterfalls on Scarif go? They built this big tower in the middle of a tropical oasis and to avoid flooding issues, diverted the waters around the tower causing waterfalls to...... where? The planet core? Or does it go into, like the basement? Then where? The water has to go somewhere!
Speaking of Scarif. It has an energy shield around the entire planet. The Rebels can't get in. Did they try the password combination to get into the air lock, I mean, energy shield?
So, Luke is whining about wanting to go join "The Academy." To be clear, this was the academy to join the Empire. Luke was going to be an Imperial Officer! Imagine that that world would have been like! Also, how does Luke go from having his heart set on joining the Imperial Academy to signing up with the Rebels just because? Talk about a flip-flopper.
Speaking of Luke not being too sure about things, in order to entice Han to help rescue Leia he tells Han that "she's rich." How does he know? Just because she's a princess doesn't mean she's rich. What if the Alderaan economy is in the toilet? Leia could very well be broke. Luke's doesn't know. I mean, sure he just wants Han to help, so he's trying everything he can to make that happen. But, he says it so convincingly and matter-of-factly that he believes it's true. This is getting nitpicky, I'm just going to move on, after I say that Luke lucked out.
But while we're on the topic of Luke stretching the truth... When the Rebel Engineers asked Luke if he wanted a new droid because R2 "seems a little beat up" and Luke responds "not on your life. That little droid and I have been through a lot," remember? Exactly what does Luke think is "a lot?" He's had R2 for, what, a few weeks at most? Sure, they both went through the Death Star escape, but they didn't exactly do it together, since they were on different levels at different times. They both managed to not be at home when the Stormtroopers charred Owen and Beru. Other than that, what have they done together? I get that he has loyalty to R2, and I appreciate that, but don't lie about your adventures.
Now let's travel to Hoth, shall we? An ice planet where, as everyone says multiple times "there's no sign of life." Excuse me! What do you call tauntauns and the wampa? They're lifeforms native to that planet! You want to go with sentient beings or intelligent life, sure, but don't insult their worth by calling them lifeless.
Speaking of tauntauns, why did Han's tauntaun die? I get that it's absolutely freezing outside, but if the tauntaun is genetically designed to withstand the hostile Hoth cold how did it die that quickly when neither Han nor Luke did? Sure, that (or any tauntaun) is not a primary hero of the saga, but it seems unlikely that Luke and Han wouldn't have died first, I don't care how warm their clothes are.
You know where it's not cold? In hell, which apparently the "Star Wars" universe has. Moments before Han's tauntaun dies, he tells an anonymous Rebel soldier that his tauntaun will in fact freeze, to which Han tells him where he'll see him next. But, when Jedi die (or presumably anyone dies) they become part of the Cosmic Force. So, is the Cosmic Force heaven? Then there's a hell, like every other religion's hell? Can you have a hell if you don't have a god?
Maybe Rey was right to call the Millennium Falcon "garbage." After all, how much time was spent in "Empire" trying to fix the old bucket of bolts? One scene in particular, though, is troubling. When the Falcon is flying out of Hoth and before they meet up with the Imperial Fleet, Chewie and Han are fixing things on the ship. Who's flying? I think by know we've established that Leia doesn't seem to be much of a pilot. I can't remember really ever seeing her fly anything. Plus, I don't think Han would trust her to fly it. Sure, autopilot. But wouldn't autopilot have avoided the asteroid field?
Can we all acknowledge that Yoda doesn't blink in "Empire" and "ROTJ?" I mean, neither does Kermit the Frog or Miss Piggy, but the Muppets are supposed to be cartoon-y. Yoda's supposed to be real. He kind of blinks, but his eyelids don't go all the way down, so he kind of ends up looking drunk. At least when he tries to blink he does so with both eyes at once, unlike the "Toy Story" characters. (Read #2, and now you can never watch the movie the same way again).
Something I noticed for the first time watching "Empire" this time around is that when Luke and Vader are about to start fighting, you can totally see the prop lightsaber in Vader's hands, with the non-glowy blade. Look closely. It's there.
Why does "delusions of grandeur" almost become the new "I have a bad feeling about this." How often does anyone use the term "delusions of grandeur?" C-3PO uses it in reference to R2-D2 in "Empire" and Han uses it in "ROTJ" when he finds out Luke is a Jedi Knight. It just kind of makes it look like lazy writing.
Also, what is or who is Lobot? Is he human? Is he robot? Is he droid? I don't know. Maybe we can get "Lobot: A Star Wars Story." Because isn't that tops on everybody's list.
How cool does the Second Death Star look, right? I mean, it's all jagged and incomplete and scary looking. But, where are the air seals? Think about that for a second... Engineers/architects/contractors have to build this thing in space. Yet, people are actively working inside it. It's not like an office building where you can just tarp off the floors under construction. If it's not sealed off you get sucked into the vacuum of space and die. So where are they? Does the energy shield from Endor also serve as an air lock? I just don't want some independent contractor from, let's say, Corellia have to get sucked out into space and have all the fluids evaporate from his body because he's working on one of the walls on the bottom right side of the Death Star where it's unfinished. That's all.
I'm also not sure I'm buying the size difference between the two Death Stars. I mean, this seems a bit much, no? It's tough to have a frame of reference compared to planet size or ship size, but I guess it has to be significantly bigger when the Super Star Destroyer crashes into it and looks tiny by comparison. But here's the thing, my whole argument about the timeframe of when they started building the Second Death Star really holds up here. Because if this one is bigger than the first then they would have had to started building it while they were already building the first one. And if this one is bigger but both can destroy planets, why do you need both? It's not like it's a cruise line where you need different size ships to navigate different depths of water or ports that vary in width. Why spend the $419 quintrillion for a space station that can destroy a planet when you can just spend $193 quintrillion to destroy that same planet. Now, if you were to tell me that the Second Death Star could destroy multiple planets at once, once it was finished being built (despite the claims of it being fully operational), maybe I could buy into that. But to that I'd say that the First Order really over compensated.
And while we're on the topic of Death Stars, wouldn't you think for all that time and money the Empire is spending on a second Death Star that they would have made sure to not have a fatal flaw that could result in the (relative easily) blowing up of the whole station? I mean, sure, the first one had a flaw that was hidden by Galen Erso because he didn't really want to be involved in the project, but was forced to, so rebelled (get it?) and made sure the station could be easily crippled. But why does the Second Death Star suffer the same, or similar, fate? Might we get "Rogue Two: A Star Wars Story?" Or, maybe it'll be "The Many Bothans That Died: A Star Wars Story."
When did Luke become a Jedi Knight? He introduces himself, by hologram, to Jabba as "Jedi Knight." But then Yoda tells him he's not a Jedi Knight until he confronts Vader. So, is Luke really just a compulsive liar? Or does he lie only when it benefits him, which would make him a compulsive liar. I love Luke, but he's the worst!
Speaking of lies. Obi-Wan not telling Luke about his sister... What a jerk, right? The issue I have here is, Obi-Wan says that Luke's sister was kept safely anonymous. Instantly then Luke knows his sister is Leia. Safely anonymous, my ass!
Han, Leia, Chewie, C-3PO, and R2-D2 are the only ones on the shuttle that gets past the shield and onto Endor. So, where do all the other rebels come from? Maybe it's a bigger shuttle than just the cockpit, but then why don't the other rebels get captured and almost eaten by the Ewoks? Was there a second shuttle? Were there Rebels already on the surface? So many questions.
Who is Lor San Tekka? Max von Sydow is too big of a name to have a five minute part of a nobody in a Star Wars movie. Lor San Tekka has to be a bigger deal, right? But he dies five minutes into the movie! Again, a lot of the questions I have could and probably would be answered by reading the books or the comics or whatnot. I'm not a casual "Star Wars" fan, but I also don't dedicate 100% of my free time to the saga (contrary to how long this blog post is). But, for the casual fans, it's baffling that Max von Sydow would be in a Star Wars movie and have such a little part with no explanation as to who he is. Maybe there's more coming in the next few years, so we'll see.
Speaking of more to be revealed, clearly Rey has a complicated backstory. Even so, how does she understand BB-8? He's a droid that speaks in beeps, whirs, and whizzes. She's a scrapper. Does she often come across BB units? I mean, she's so isolated that she thought the story of Luke Skywalker and the Jedi was a myth, so how did she have time to learn to speak droid? I guess it's easier than having her not understand him, from a storytelling perspective, but that idea wasn't without it's faults.
And my final random thought is that Kylo Ren clearly knows Rey. Not just like knows who she is, but that he actually knows her. Am I wrong? His reactions give it away. I guarantee this will all be answered on December 15th, and until then I will just have to wait and speculate. I'm saying they're cousins. But it's almost too obvious to have Rey be Luke's daughter. One of the best theories I've heard though is that she's Luke's daughter and her mom is Obi-Wan's daughter (which I mentioned earlier). But that opens up the whole can of worms of when did Obi-Wan have a daughter, and with who? Because we know it isn't Satine, because she died (and thankfully. That whole love story was unpleasant). I heard one theory that she's Leia and Han's daughter, but that seems terribly unlikely because the way Leia and Han act around her, refusing to acknowledge the possibility of that relationship would make them literally the worst parents ever (one kid that they abandoned and refuse to acknowledge and one that turned to the Dark Side. Parenting 101, right?). Maybe she's Lor San Tekka's daughter! That would make sense, and give Max von Sydow flashback opportunities! So many possibilities and the future is so bright!
So there we have it, one guys rantings, ravings, and ramblings of his thoughts and opinions on "Star Wars." Consider this your after-credits scene (which is the least "Star Wars" like thing about this post). I don't know what my life would be like without having watched and fallen in love with "Star Wars." Maybe better, maybe worse? I know that being a "Star Wars" fan often comes with a "nerd" or "geek" type stigma, which growing up I tried to fight (not about Star Wars, just in general), but now I fully embrace it. I like who I am and if that's nerdy and dorky while also being a guy who loves sports, music, and other more "normal" things, then I'm okay with that.
There will always be things I could learn about the "Star Wars" universe that I don't already know. Would I like to have enough free time (and money) to read all of the books and comics? Yea, sure. But I like doing other things too. Eventually, maybe someday, I can catch up. But until then, I remain confident in my knowledge of the goings on a long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away...
Thank you for sticking with me through this. I really did enjoy this product, and I'm curious to see how it will affect the way I watch these movies again in the future. I hope some of this was enlightening to you, and that hopefully you didn't disagree with too many of my opinions. Even if you did, I don't really care, but I'd welcome the discussion. So, until next time... that's what's going on in Bronto's Brain.
May the Force be with you.
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